Was i in the wrong for not telling my ex about a pregnancy and miscarriage right away
So back in Augest my ex partner and I got into it really badly. There was abus from both us and we both ended up in a week long psychiatric stay at seperate locations. After that he ended things with me saying maybe we can work it out but for now we should just work on ourselves. I have abandonment issues so I was really going through it and asked to speak to him in person and he said he wasnt ready yet. I said okay.
After I got released from the hospital I started noticing nausea, extreme fatigue but I chalked it up to side effects from the anti depressant and anxiety meds i was put on.
Well my period was late. I took a test and it did come out positive. I set up an appointment with my nurse to confirm with blood tests and I was indeed pregnant. She sent a referral out to obgyn and while waiting for my appointment and figuring out a way to tell the ex over text cause he wouldnt see me in person, I had started bleeding so I went in and was told that I was starting a miscarriage. The tissue didnt pass on its own so I was given meds.
I was completely broken after that.
And during that time when I was consumed with my own grief I never did the father right away.
A week later when I finally did tell him, he told me he was sorry that happened and how i went through it alone and that was the end of that conversation. He didnt ask how I was or anything about the pregnancy. He did ask why I never told him anything and I replied with "would it have made a difference because you made it clear you didnt want to see me yet" and he avoided the answer.
I tried asking for his support but he said he's still not ready to see me.
Im gonna add that this man's place of work is a minute walk around the corner from my place so he goes by my house every day several times a day so its been harder to heal when im seeing him go by so often. Im not out there waiting for him to go by, in fact I actively try to avoid the times I know he goes in and for lunch and when hes done for the day but the nature of his job requires him to be in and out of the office several times a day sometimes.
Its been a month now and I tried revisitng the topic and asked him whats so wrong about supporting the woman who lost your baby but his answer this time was "I will help you when the time comes" and he has since blocked me a social media. I have apologized and stated that I should have told him right away but im getting nothing but silence.
I can own up and admit that I should have told him right away but based on his words, he wouldnt have shown up anyways, am I really the asshole here?