AITH: For getting mad that my little cousins eat my fruit?
I know the title makes me sound like an AH right off the bat, but please hear me out. This is more of a rant post because I obviously would never tell my cousins they can’t eat food. As my mom always says, you never deny anyone food. My issue is more with the principle of their parents allowing them to grab things without asking.
I (24F) live with my parents and 2 siblings, and I’m the main person who buys groceries for the week. I especially like having fruit around because we snack on them throughout the day. For the past couple of weeks, my paternal aunt has been bringing her family over unannounced so we can “play” with her kids, who are 11, 5, and 2.
At first, when they came over, they would ask if they could have some fruit because the kids were hungry. We would happily give them fruit and other snacks. Recently, it has started to feel expected. Instead of asking they now just grab fruit and other snacks on their own. One time before they even came inside our home, I overheard the 11 year old telling the 5 year old that they wanted to see if we had mangoes so they could take some home.
Every single time they come over, they ask to take fruit home with them. I know they are not struggling for food because their parents always talk about how much food and fruit they already have at home, to the point where some of it goes bad and gets thrown out.
What really bothered me was the 11 year old taking a mango without asking first. Whenever this happens their mom either says nothing or laughs it off by saying the kids just love eating fruit at our house. She even jokes that they should be called the “ransackers” because they eat up all of our fruit and snacks whenever they visit and they sometimes come over twice a week.
I’ve also started to feel some resentment toward my aunt’s family because it feels like they now expect our house to be a pantry where they can just choose whatever they want to eat or take home. I don’t mind sharing food with family and would never deny them food, but it’s becoming frustrating that this behavior has turned into a normal expectation.
The problem is that when they come over, they end up eating most of the fruit we bought for the entire week. It’s started to get frustrating because I’m the one spending money on groceries that my own household barely even gets to eat since they finish so much of it when they visit. What makes it even more frustrating is that sometimes they don’t even finish what they take. They’ll leave food half-eaten and immediately move on to the next snack.
Am I valid in feeling frustrated that they eat our food? I’ve talked to my parents about it, but they say that sharing food among family is normal and I’m not arguing that it isn’t. However, I feel like I am now providing for an additional household because now I have to buy more groceries so that we have enough food.