my parents want me to pay back school loans under their name! what should I do?
Hi All -
I’ve been writing under this thread for a while now about my narcissistic parents. We’ve had a rocky relationship, and just over the past year. I’ve decided to part ways with them because of the detriment they have caused my spouse and I. On occasion I will keep in contact with my mother, but I haven’t spoken to my father in a little over 6 months.
Just recently (today lol), my mother reach out to me with a message from my father. Saying that mine and my sister’s student loans deferment was coming to an end and that I will need to be making payments. I was aware they pulled loans out on my behalf but I always thought it was under my name, and social. Which, the ones that are under my name, I have been paying directly to the GOV to this day. Little did I know, I WOULD BE HAVING TO MAKE NEW PAYMENTS DIRECTLY THEM FOR THESE LOANS COMING DUE (Parental Loans). I was absolutely unaware that they pulled out loans under their name nor did I ask them to do that. If I did, I would have told them no. My mother said that it was the only way I was going to finish school. They tend to hang “things they have done for me” over my head quite a bit. Which is why I have worked so hard to be financially independent from them.
To say the least I was completely blindsided. My parents have always kept me out of the loop when it comes to independent financial knowledge And it looks like I owe them $40,000 for the remainder of my schooling. They say that I have to make payments to until my grandparents pass, and they will use their condo to pay off the remainder when they sell it.
Am I in the wrong for being angry? Now they want me to pay them back for loans they took out without my knowledge! They have written me out of their will, harassed me and asked me to return all sentimental items that were given to me as gifts, from them and my grandparents. All because I decided to marry someone they don’t deem worthy. There are never gifts without strings attached I have learned, and I feel like this is just them trying to have little more control then that do. Plus it is joint with my sisters loans, so I will have no confirmation that my $ will be only going towards my loans! Any Advice Please!!