Need better discipline techniques other than saying “stop” 1000 times a day
I need discipline techniques that actually work. Time outs, restriction, yelling, etc does not work and I’m at a loss. I have two daughters who are 9 and 6. My 9 year old is so sweet, smart, silly, and caring. But I think she just has so much energy she (or I) doesn’t know what to do with. For an example, yesterday after school I made them a snack and had them sit at the table and have some screen time while they ate. Every 2 minutes she’s randomly screaming (for no reason) or making loud and obnoxious noises. Just while she’s watching a show and eating. I keep saying “please stop” like five times before I just went up and took the tablet away. I went back to sit down on the couch and she followed me over and just keeps being obnoxious to me. I can’t tell if she feels bad she got the tablet taken away so she’s trying to get my attention or if she thinks she’s going to be so annoying that I’ll give in and give her tablet back. She’s just starting pointless conversations about buttcracks and trying to be silly and purposely doing things she knows I don’t like. But WHY?? She is so smart, in the gifted and talented program, behaves perfectly at school. At home she’s like a different person.
Dinner time is a whole other story. My daughters are constantly being silly to get a reaction out of each other. Their dad and I have to say over and over to behave, stop doing this, knock it off. We made spaghetti the other night and my daughter takes a handful and starts eating out of her hand, she thinks it’s funny and it makes my other daughter laugh. I have to tell her “come on, don’t do that.” And it’s things like this every single night.
They do inappropriate things because they think it’s funny. Like talk about private parts, say bad words, purposely make each other mad, scream for no reason. They do it because they want a reaction, or think it’s funny, or I don’t know. I just feel like they’re so misbehaved that if I were to punish them, they’d be punished all day every day.
Im at a loss. I feel like all day I’m saying “stop doing xyz.” My husband says I need to facilitate more activities but they’re in school now and home from 4-8. They have dance class once a week, play dates once a week, and other activities like restaurants, random outings we do for fun. I feel like they’re old enough to find things to do, like play Barbie’s, play with the many toys they have, color, make bracelets, watch tv. Maybe I’m wrong though. I need some advice. I feel like I’m going crazy. And I feel like I’ve done something wrong raising my kids.