u/Rich_Perception_53

First off, words of appreciation for the people of this subReddit, the best crowd of people online from the Indian Reddit scene.

The Comma: By comma, I don’t mean the medical coma but the English literature’s metaphorical comma, a pause, because I believe this chapter of mine doesn’t have a full stop to it yet. The past week I was so lost that I have been an unreliable business partner to my father and a profitable credit cardholder to Amex (I missed out on a bill due date). All this happened as I was being ghosted by a fabulous woman (alias Sahiba) that I matched on Reddit about five odd weeks ago. The night when she and I first connected, it wasn’t something too magical as we were just breaking the ice but we started vibing for real as we hit it off from the Day 2. The feelings were mutual, the playfulness, the honesty, the longing, every word that was exchanged felt like we were going somewhere. And I wouldn’t hide it, it felt a little too perfect that there was a sense of doubt of the other person to be an imposter so we talked about meeting in real life. This blissfulness or my delusiveness continued then came the act where she disappeared. I waited (not for too long though) to convey her how I felt about her not talking to me but the ghoster wouldn’t speak up. I locked myself in my room and started talking to my best friend, the best listener in the world; the Notes app on my phone. And I have figured, I am a lunatic who gets too attached too soon to the first good thing that comes his way and no matter how much I try I will always remain this way.

The Dilemma: Seeing how gloomy I was acting, my parents who I had told about Sahiba in the Week 2 wanted to cheer me up and insisted that I come with them to a sundowner at Avadh. (Context: Avadh Utopia is Surat’s answer to Soho House Juhu except only without the celebrities and a sea view) We are not big on eating out and we seldom eat outside food and seeing my parents putting in efforts to make me happy, I decided that I will behave for a few hours and then go back to sulking when I get back home. So, at one of the restaurants in Utopia, my parents and I were chit chatting and eating our food and I had made some Surat specific joke. A man and a girl from the next table overheard us (since the club is members only it is pretty uncrowded and quiet) and started laughing with us. The girl from the next table was this man’s daughter. Then my father and the girl’s father started talking. Then they both vibed on their political opinions so they talked even more. Then her father asked the servers to merge our dining tables. She sat on the chair parallel to me and we started talking. Our likes and humours matched as we both religiously listen to the same podcast. Then after the sundowner our fathers went to the poker room while Harshi and I walked on the lawn by the pool area, she and I walked for a few minutes then we sat on the grass and we talked. Afore this, whilst we were getting off the elevator, the back of our palms brushed as the both of us reached to turn off the fan on the elevator as we stepped out. This is when I saw her eyes twinkle, the same twinkle that I saw in my eyes for Sahiba. At the lawn, she asked me if I am seeing anyone and I said no but I mentioned about Sahiba and that it’s a blind matching and dating kind of a scene. She said, “nice but these things don’t result to anything” it was as if she did not want Sahiba and I to workout and I disliked this about her. So I tried to change the topic through a joke. I asked her, “What are your pronouns, are they her and she?” Because her name is Harshi. She laughed and thought I was hitting on her. Then she went on to tell me that she will turn 26 next month and her dad will soon start looking for rishtas to marry her off by the end of 2027. She asked me if I find her pretty. I nodded because she was wearing a off-white summer dress and her hair styled like a low messy bun with two front tendrils. She pulled off that look really well. I had never seen a baniya chic do that before. She then took my phone and gave me her iMessage ID and said we should do this again sometime (She did not ask for my iMessage and said that the decision was mine). Then whilst leaving, at the valet her father indicated that Harshi and I should go on a proper date next week. Everyone awkwardly laughed and left.
And then during the ride back home, my over enthusiastic mother started making hashtags for Harshi and I #Kushi. Later on, I got to know from them that this meet was a set-up by both our parents arranged by a common socialite that we know. Harshi and I were unaware of this. My father said to at least try out my chances with Harshi beta as it would save both the families a lot of time and energy.

The question: I ask the good people of this subReddit to help me navigate through this with their experience in being in relationships and having gone through the arranged marriage scene themselves, I ask you to point me to the right direction. Am I silly to hold on and not move on? Or silly to not see the “pinch me moment” that happened to me with Harshi? But how do I explain in words to you guys what I feel about Sahiba? Only if Sahiba had told me if it’s a comma or a full stop between her and I!