u/RustyTrephine

Long story short: early last Sunday morning around 2am, I was assaulted while leaving a pub. A man splashed me on my back with a cup of coffee, and since then, my life has been upended dramatically.

My entire upper back and neck is covered in blistering 2nd degree burns, and each time I turn my head, or bend over, or reach for something, I am put in excruciating pain. It's been 4 days and I have spiraled into a pit of despair that has left me feeling so violated, so disrespected, and so unworthy of love. The fact that a total stranger can just disfigure and incapacitate me so severely in such a quick fell swoop, with an item as ubiquitous as coffee, I've never experienced anything like it. I'm 30 and I haven't been in a fight since middle school, I never thought in a million years something like this would happen to me. I can't shower, I can barely go to work, and when I do I let my team down with my slow pace (I'm a line cook at a busy restaurant), I can't hike, swim, or enjoy any of my normal outdoor activities. I am more or less completely bedridden, but even sleep is a major challenge only achievable through painkillers. Just an hour ago I woke up in a puddle of my own urine; I've never wet the bed before, I have no idea what's happening to me. I want to throw my body into the trash and be separated from it permanently, I don't want it any more.

I am a lonely person, I only have my father, and a few pen pals. This whole ordeal has my father extremely angry and distressed. He wants to go on a John Wick style killing spree until he finds who did this to me (cops couldn't locate him, he hopped into his truck and sped off.) I keep telling my father that I don't care about justice, and I just want to get better and get my old life back, but he he's too blinded by rage to hear any of it. I feel horrible for inflicting all of this upon him, and I know he loves me, but I would almost rather be completely alone because seeing him spiral like this is hard to watch.

When I'm not at work, I just lay on my couch, waiting to fall asleep. My life has become one long, excruciating Twilight Zone episode. I got my burns re-dressed yesterday, and they want me to return every 3 days to have it redone. Despite the extremely painful procedure, I am actually looking forward to my next dressing because the sympathy the nurse offered me has been the only comfortable human interaction I've recieved in these past four days. I don't know where to turn or what to do.

Has anyone here been through a similar feeling, and if so, how did you survive?