u/SAjoats

Chris Cocks: Thanks, Fred. Look, I'll be honest with everyone: Magic: The Gathering is the only reason this company is still alive. We had a great quarter entirely because we keep printing cardboard with Ninja Turtles, Marvel, and Disney characters on it, and nerds keep buying it. We call it our "Playing to Win" strategy, which is just corporate speak for milking our IP until it bleeds.

Our new Magic set sold better than anything else because we mashed it up with other people's franchises. People are also buying our old cardboard at record rates. We even charged 23,000 people to stand in a convention center in Vegas just to buy more cardboard. It's a goldmine.

Outside of the card game, we're burning cash on two AAA video games that we swear are coming out next year. On the toy side, kids don't play with physical toys anymore, so we're desperately trying to sell plastic Grogu dolls and Marvel action figures to nostalgic adults. We are completely at the mercy of Disney's movie slate not sucking this year.

Oh, and we got massively hacked. Our IT and operations teams haven't slept in a month and are having a collective breakdown, but we're pretending it's business as usual. Here's Gina to explain how much money we lost on toys.

Gina Goetter: Thanks, Chris. Yeah, Magic is carrying us. We made $1 billion in revenue, and Wizards of the Coast made $298 million in profit. Meanwhile, our toy division lost $41 million. We're calling toy revenue "essentially flat" to keep the stock price from tanking. We also made $41 million from Monopoly Go, which is basically just a mobile slot machine.

We fired enough people to save $37 million, which we're calling "cost transformation efforts."

We're keeping our financial guidance the same for the year, even though shipping plastic from China is getting ridiculously expensive because of oil prices. We're just going to try and cut more costs to make up for it.

And about that hack Chris mentioned? It was a disaster. It cost us $20 million just to clean up the mess. We literally couldn't send out invoices or ship things properly, so $60 million in toy sales got pushed to the next quarter. We're burying that in the guidance. But hey, we're still paying our dividend and buying back stock, so please don't sell your shares. Back to the operator.

I'm new to MTG and would like an easy deck that evryone can enjoy playing againt. I don't know any cards yet, but im looking forward to learning.