My mom needs help...
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Hi all I need to vent but any help I would be grateful for;
I (26F) have actively searched for a subreddit like this to help my mom (60sF).
For as long as I can remember my mom was financially frugal, and openly spoke about the needs in the family, whether they came a few months later, things got sorted out. My mom has always loved shopping and clothes, so much so numerous members of her extended family would "put up" with shopping with her, because that is what she would choose to do when we visited them in the bigger cities (usually).
Growning up there were about 3-4 rooms of the house that were incrediblly cluttered. Whenever we had company, it was always "take your things and put them away." I had noticed around elementary school, most of my things were already in my room or playroom and I hadn't had much out in the "hosting" spaces. Of course I would help in cleaning up, but it would bug me that i would end up cleaning up my parents mess.
As I got older the rooms which held the most clutter got progressively worse, especially since i moved for college and then again for my first job.
As I spent more time out of my childhood home I realized how I grew up surrounded by clutter really wasnt that normal & how her claim of "this house doesnt have enough space or storage like i wanted." Was ultimately; "i will fill every corner of this house if you give me long enough."
At this moment my mom has taken over the guest room, my bathroom, the office, and the entire dining room & kitchen island. As soon as I remove my remaining items from my childhood bedroom, I know she will be placing even more junk in my closet and bedroom next.
I recognize this is part of a of midlife crisis; as she is purchasing clothes people my age and younger wear. She continually is making comments on "getting" her body back when she sees mine.
More conserningly she has fallen into a horrible habit of collecting skincare for every marketed ad she comes across. Resulting in counters FULL of junk she doesnt use very day or repeate products. Her unmedicated ADHD, and recent phone addiction doesnt help this either.
I know her being surrounded by these piles of old mail, supplements and excessive stuff is paralyzing for her, but I dont even know where to start going through piles.
I hate coming home and seeing her exhausted or overwhelmed so i cant even bring up the topic, but I also hate coming to my childhood home and seeing it such a depressing state.
How can I get through to helping her?
TLTR: my mom has a shopping addiction, and unmedicated ADHD along with an addiction to her phone. The increase in piles junk is effecting her mental health. How can I help her?