WIBTA for refusing to go to my dad’s second wedding after he excluded me from most of the planning?
I (23F) have been going back and forth on this for weeks.
My parents divorced when I was 16, and I’ve stayed close with my dad since then. He got engaged about a year ago, and his wedding is coming up next month.
A few months ago, I asked if I could help with planning or at least be involved in some of the decisions, since I thought it would be nice to be included. At first he said yes, but in practice I was mostly left out. Most decisions were made with his fiancée and her family, and I usually only found out things after they were already decided like venue, guest list changes, and even the ceremony details.
I tried not to take it personally, but it started to feel like I was just a guest rather than his daughter. When I brought it up, he said I was overthinking it and that weddings are stressful and it’s easier for him to just handle things with his fiancée.
Last week I found out I wasn’t even listed as part of the wedding party or included in any formal role, which hurt more than I expected. I brought it up again and he said they decided to keep it simple and didn’t want to overcomplicate things.
Now I feel kind of sidelined from something that’s supposed to be a big family moment. I told him I’m not sure I want to attend anymore if I’m just going to show up as an afterthought guest. He got upset and said I’m trying to make his wedding about me and causing unnecessary drama.
My mom says I should still go to support him, even if I’m hurt, because it’s an important day in his life. A couple friends say I’m justified and that I’m reacting to being excluded.
Now I’m stuck between feeling disrespected and feeling like I might be overreacting.
WIBTA for refusing to attend my dad’s wedding after being excluded from planning and involvement?