I feel weird about using donor sperm
I was wondering if anyone else out there feels this way.
I've had no problems with the idea of being a single mom and I'm currently a single mom of one to a child from a previous partnership. I've been looking into conceiving a second child via donor sperm and really wasn't expecting that the place I'd get stuck is the idea of using donor sperm.
First is the idea of having donor sperm injected via IUI or ICI. I know it's totally clinical, but the idea makes me feel like I'm having sex with a stranger. I could do IVF to skip this.
Then is the idea of carrying a stranger's DNA in my body.
And finally, it feels weird to have a whole person sitting across from me at the dinner table who is half me and half a stranger. I'd always wonder if there's something I don't recognize, whose traits are popping up--mine or his?
But the even stranger part is that I have none of these qualms with the idea of an embryo that is 0% my DNA, e.g. through embryo adoption or separate egg and sperm donors. The first ick is obviously not relevant. And I'm totally open to carrying and raising a child who is not genetically related to me.
Anyone else feel this way or can help me make sense of why I feel so differently about a halfway related child vs a completely unrelated child?