My clinic told me they would do IUI the next day after trigger shot, so roughly 24 hours, but I know in IVF trigger shot is administered 36 hours before egg retrieval, I am really worrying about the timing thing as frozen sperm only lasts 12 hours, any advice?
We’re Americans in the US and I know what is officially recommended. The reason I’d like to stop traveling with this document is fear of theft, which could have catastrophic consequences, or damage. I don’t like the stress of worrying about it.
I’m a widowed mom to my oldest and he had been to 27 countries with just me before turning 18. I’ve always had his birth certificate and his dad’s death certificate with me but the only time I’d ever been asked for documentation was on a cruise. I’ve had bags lost forever or stolen but luckily never with the documents.
I now have a baby I had solo. She’s been abroad 3 times and I’ve never been asked for her birth certificate. I’m considering just having a scanned copy saved on my phone and calling it good. Maybe a photocopy folded into my passport holder. We have a trip to Norway and Sweden in the fall. Both countries recommend having something but don’t explicitly require it either. I’m kinda thinking of leaving the birth certificate at home.
But I wanted to check here - have you ever been asked for a birth certificate while traveling? And if so, what country are you from and where were you traveling to, and at what stage (e.g immigration, security, boarding etc) did they ask for it?
So I have my first visit with a fertility clinic tomorrow and I want to know what to expect/questions to ask. I’m not planning on becoming a mother right away, but I’m going over my options and setting the groundwork for when I’m ready (around 32 or 33, I’m currently 30). I know I want to ask about what my insurance covers and I know I’ll have to get bloodwork done and I want to find out if iui or ivf is the better choice, especially since I don’t plan on getting pregnant for 2 or 3 years, but is there anything I’m missing?
I’m a 25 year old virgin, never been in a relationship, not interested, but I would love to be a mom one day. Hopefully in a few more years. What’s the process like for IUI? How did you pick the sperm donor?
I’m sure I’ll have so many more questions, but I just can’t think of them right now.
This morning I had my first IUI. Unfortunately, yesterday late afternoon, my 10yr male cat passed away. He’d been diagnosed with a heart condition (HCM), so while this was expected to happen at some point, it happened suddenly and I’m still devastated. I raised him from a kitten, and he’s been with me and my other female cat (9) all this time. I was prepared to be anxious after the IUI, but not grieving. I don’t really know why I’m posting this, just hoping for some support if anyone is able to give it.
Maybe an odd question or even a little dumb, but do you guys stop drinking sugar free energy drinks when ttc? Or do you stop after a positive? I've seen people drink alcohol up until a positive, now i'm not really a huge drinker anyway so I haven't been drinking at all since my last period. However, i do drink energy drinks, not a crazy amount, probably 1 every 2 days if that. I often just have my homemade latte in the morning and then sometimes ill have an energy drink a little later in the day.
Is this something I should stop? I see conflicting things on it on if it's actually harmful, so I wonder what others do
I am 39, F and from London & next month and I’m deciding to be a single mother by choice.
I would love to connect with Similar women.
I am mentally drained right now, and just coming out of a long term relationship.
I’d love the support. This journey just feels so lonely.
Id love to be able to speak and connect with someone ladies. It could be over whattsapp. Text or call. Whatever works.
Hope I hear back from someone x
Hi everyone,
My fertility doctor told me my egg supply is low and because I am turning 40 next April I need to start IUI as soon as possible .After 6 unsuccessful tries of IUI my insurance will pay for IVF but not after April of 2027. What are some reasonable low priced sperm banks ?
On other platforms where SMBC gather they seem to constantly be planning cruises. One of my DC kids is 1 and others are frozen embryos so we’re not ready to partake but that sounds pretty awesome to get our kids together with other DC kids and to meet other SMBC on a low commitment, easy to hide if needed, space. I hate cruises to be honest but it makes complete sense for something like this. But so does an all inclusive in the Riviera Maya... (just throwing it out there to hopefully inspire the Type A moms here to plan in like 4 years).
Anyway, has anyone been on one of these cruises? Or maybe other gatherings? How was it?
My girl has always been partial to men, seems fascinated by them and will often start chats with random men we see in public and has a preference for male members of the family.
She used to shout daddy every time we saw a man collecting their child from nursery (or in the street or on a train) so I corrected and now she says ‘hello man look at me man what am I doin man)
Anyway yesterday the nursery worker says, very sombrely, she wants to bring something to my attention and it’s that my daughter has been saying she wants her own daddy a lot recently. Then on queue my girl starts saying she wants her own daddy and doesn’t stop the whole walk home.
The nursery know the situation and I’ve asked them to just tell my daughter she ‘doesn’t have a daddy’ in a normal tone when she asks these sorts of questions to normalise it.
We have the smbc books and I tell her the reason she doesn’t have a daddy is because she has a mummy who wanted her too much but not sure how else to help her understand and be proud of her roots at this young age.
Have others experienced similar? Any helpful tips or tricks out there?
Didn’t reaaally have any symptoms yesterday, just a headache and some abdominal aching but nothing that i’d say was implantation. I’m just hoping for a sign of implantation, i know a lot of times you don’t even feel it, but it would give me so much hope.
We’ll see what today brings. I’ll start testing in two days! Still early i know but i cannot wait any longer so made the deal with myself that thats the earliest i will let myself test haha
Hi everyone,
I'm not really sure what my post is going to be about exactly, but I feel like I want to put my thoughts down amongst like-minded people.
I am 42 and have pretty much been single my entire life. When I was in my 20s I recall telling an acquaintance that if I was still single when I'm older then I would go and have a baby by myself. Obviously I never imagined that it would actually become my reality, but here we are.
3 years ago I decided to get some basic fertility testing done, and my main reason for not going ahead with solo IVF at the time was because of my financial situation. After telling a male friend (who I was starting to be interested in romantically) that I had the testing done with the view to using donor sperm, he made a "sure I'll do it for free" comment and then after further conversation we decided to see if there could potentially be something between us. Long story short, I invested a lot of feelings in him but things didn't really progress and he eventually just ghosted me. I had started to save money in the meantime anyway and I am now in a much better financial position to pursue the idea of solo IVF.
I have an appointment next Friday for a repeat nurse consultation/bloods. 3 years ago my AMH was 8.4 pmol/l and a few weeks ago I paid to have a home AMH test done and my AMH was 9.29 pmol/l. I'm relieved to know that my AMH has stayed steady in the last 3 years but I also know that my chances are low, considering my age.
I have told some members of my family, who are supportive, but perhaps a bit cautious about encouraging me. For some reason I have found it incredibly difficult to tell my younger sister that I am closest to, and also my parents. Not really sure why this is, maybe I'm worried that they will be 'sensible' about the idea, and discourage me. For some extra context, I still live at home with my parents. My mum has incurable lung cancer and has treatment every 21 days, and my dad has been diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment which is showing up as memory loss/confusion. I obviously worry about whether me trying to bring a child into the home is a ridiculous thing to do, but I also know that I will regret it if I don't at least try to fulfil my dream.
Sorry for the incredibly long post, and thank you if you've made it this far! As I said, I'm not even sure what/if I am looking for advice, or just somewhere to try and process my thoughts amongst like-minded people!
Hello All,
I’m really grateful for this community and would love some perspective from others who may relate.
I had my first IUI last month and it failed. This was more emotional than I thought it would be. I did it mostly unmedicated because of neurological disabilities, but the trigger shot still caused a severe migraine with aura that landed me in the ER on stroke alert. The experience also ended a close friendship, which left me questioning how I could handle solo parenting during emergencies.
The reaction confirmed IVF isn’t an option for me, and now I’m struggling with whether to keep pursuing pregnancy now via natural IUI or wait and pursue donated embryos later. I’m an early-career academic in a high-stress, unstable stage professionally, and finances are tight. In my current position I am entitled to fertility services being almost completely covered and 12 weeks paid leave. I also have a year of fellowship (a year just writing) next year. Academics do get great benefits because we aren't paid a lot, and I am lucky to be at a world-class university which does care that we are treated well. I have two more years in my contract.
I love my work and also deeply want to be a mother. I feel pulled in opposite directions. A big part of this is just the way academia works. We usually get tenure and stability around 40 as our training can be around a decade similar to surgeons or other specialists and then tenure takes 5-7 years to earn (if you get it). It's all a very odd system and for me I think it makes sense to try either before landing a TT job while I have time and flexibility or after tenure when I will have more money but less time with more work and will need to use donated embryos.
I think I’m grieving, overwhelmed, and unsure whether wanting to keep trying now is realistic or if I just have a fear of waiting. Ideally I would like a biological child, but I believe family is more than blood. I do not think traditional adoption is for me.
Has anyone else been in a similar position, especially fellow academics or people who realized that the right choice might be to pause TTC because of structural limitations even when they didn’t want to?
Edited for clarity
I (35w pregnant, uncomplicated) always imagined one of my sisters would support me during the birth, but for one reason or another, there’s been a lot of emotional distance w my family during my pregnancy. My friends have been supportive but I don’t see any of them being a birth support person.
Question: have any of you chosen to birth without anyone else present aside from medical personnel? How was it? Did you regret the choice or change your mind mid-labor and call for someone?
For context, I live in a big metro city. Current plan is to labor at home as long as possible before cabbing to hospital and receiving epidural ASAP. Will then let family know (mom/sisters etc) very soon after birth for visits and likely have one of them stay the night w me. My family live nearby so I can always tag someone in during labor.
Edit: I appreciate all the responses. A doula would obviously be ideal but the cost is really prohibitive where I live (min 2k for birth only).
Update: Thanks to all who shared those experiences and feedback ❤️. I obtained a few referrals for lower-cost doulas and will hopefully find something doable.
Didn’t have anyone around to help soothe my 1.5 week newborn, she was getting hungry but can’t hold a pacifier, im at a friends house for my rough c section recovery…..and I had a lunch that was disagreeable with my bowels which had an imminent exit time…..so…I diarrhea-ed on the toilet while breastfeeding her. sigh I know this is SO unhinged and SO gross. But I’m telling myself that most poop spreads via the flushing and baby was definitely not in the bathroom for the flush.
I’ve thought of different things being a SMBC but this was not one of them lol 😂😂😂
Please tell me. What unhinged scenarios have you been in that’s bc you’re a SMBC?
I’m just about 6 weeks, and the queasiness is definitely starting to settle in. I’m not throwing up and I wouldn’t even call the nausea super intense, but it’s enough to basically ruin my whole day lol and make work really tough.
Theres no food or dish that sounds good anymore, and when something is appetizing and I do want it, it will suddenly become completely disgusting to me an hour later. I normally LOVE food, so this has been such a bizarre feeling.
I think I’m mostly just looking for solidarity/reassurance that this gets better 😅 will I enjoy food again? Will I stop feeling vaguely hungover all day? Please tell me this too shall pass 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Hi all, I’m the mother to a wonderful 3.5 month old boy and I had a lot of help the first two months from my mom and aunt. Now I’ve been alone with my son for a month or so and the sleep deprivation is really adding up. This bothers me because I can see how it impacts my mood and I’m starting to have insecurities about whether I’m enough for my son, and thinking that I’m a bad mother/feeling guilty. I can still enjoy a large part of every day but I notice this all getting harder… I have a babysitter come twice a week so I can rest/nap and get some work done.
How have you all dealt with the mental health repercussions of sleep deprivation? Any suggestions? x
Hi everyone, I'm currently 34 years old with a plan of being a SMBC at 38. I've been considering fertility testing to see what my egg count/viability/etc. I want to avoid egg freezing if possible; it just seems really expensive and doesn't have a high success rate. Is it worth it to just get my fertility tested? I don't want to wait until 38 and have any surprises. If I should be looking at fertility, does anyone have any recommendations?
Oh my! thousands for one vial? How many vials are needed? Did anyone have fertility benefits that covered sperm? any ways to get it cheaper?
Got extremely nauseous this morning, i’m a girly who gets nauseous randomly all the time but this was nausea to the point of actually feeling sick to my stomach.
I had crazy twinges and stabbing pains yesterday and today my boobs feel sore to the touch, which i know isn’t uncommon for this time in the cycle, but i don’t have this normally and i’m quite in tune with my body.
I know it’s eaaaarly, but it gives me so much hope