u/Simple_Ad8597

I’ve been like 70/30 on terminating/keeping this pregnancy and I feel like I was just manipulated into continuing..

My partner has been against termination but told me I should do what I felt was right.

My mental health hasn’t been great and we are really behind on finances. Bringing another child into this is just not responsible..

I’ve had the pills and have just been too scared to take them (I only have about 2 weeks left to take them before needing a surgical)

But without telling me my partner told our older children about my pregnancy which now changes everything. I have no been put in a position where I will have to lie to them about why I’m not pregnant anymore. This feels very manipulative on his part to tell them behind my back before I was sure and ready

recently found out I was pregnant again at 35 which is already high risk

I have 3 kids

& I’ve had 3 abortions

this would be my 7th pregnancy and I was 99.99% set on doing a medication termination since it is still so early.

i went to pp and was asked if I wanted to see the ultrasound I told her no but I did want to know if there were multiples (morbid curiosity) she said it is super early but saw 2 sacs which immediately made me uncomfortable and she turned the monitor to show me .. she printed out a picture also even though I declined one.

this pregnancy was so easy mentally for me to end until i found out I’d possibly be aborting twins… which is insane bc I didn’t want to go through another single let alone double pregnancy… instead of going from 3 to 4 kids I’d have 5 if I went through with it.

my issue is my partner will always support me but leans pro life and I know he’s hopeful I’ll keep this pregnancy. I’ve expressed my concern with age and multiples already posing a high risk. I know so many women have complications with twins and I’m worried about something happening to me and my living children suffering from it.

my youngest is 3 and I would’ve liked them to have a sibling closer in age since there’s a large age gap between older siblings.

id say im leaning 80% terminate but 20% right now is weighing possibilities of continuing.

I have about a month to take the pill they said so idk if i should just find out if it’s a viable pregnancy first? The last time I doubted myself and cancelled having an early abortion I found out at 20 weeks there was a defect and had to terminate anyway so I felt stupid bc I could have done it sooner but I had no idea anything was wrong until they did the anatomy scan. part of me wonders if I had an instinct back then bc it’s kind of how I feel now .. something might be wrong and my mind is telling me to terminate before its too late but I’m having small doubts…

please share experiences if youve aborted a twin pregnancy. would the pill be more painful ?