u/Skettles1122

I really don't listen to the advice to make sure I'm sleeping regularly. I used to try so hard to achieve Lucid dreaming. Was only successful once or twice. But mostly I experienced Sleep paralysis. Not even normal sleep Paralysis. I have the most extreme sleep Paralysis I've ever heard of. Mostly I'm tossed and thrown and crumpled, twisted and contorted while I scream for help. My partner can never hear me and when I finally awake I'm so exhausted by the experience I fall back asleep straight back into the horror. I've had aliens digging around in my head. And once where I kept flipping between my room my childhood home before I was born and an 8 yr old kid getting brain surgery. Stopping dream journals and lucid dreaming never stopped the sleep Paralysis. Now I regularly sleep every other day just about. Every time I try to go back to a normal sleep schedule it happens. I got prescribed something that they give veterans to disable remembering their dreams but it only made it impossible to wake up from sleep Paralysis. I only experience the first example anymore. I'm just wondering if sleep paralysis might be part of the STPD or if it's something else.

After discovering schizotypal personality disorder through a vaguely connected series of events. I contacted my current psychiatrist as she's the only healthcare professional I've been half honest with. I spent 8 hours trying to formulate the proper way to open the conversation.I decided 30 min before the appointment I called the office and asked them to inform her prior that I would be specifically talking about my "self diagnosis" of schizotypal. I think it went well. She assured me that she deals with psychosis daily and I wasn't being hyperbolic. I scored a 9/9 on the diagnosis and now have an appointment to confirm with a psychologist. I'm wondering what happens now? I feel like I'm suddenly "unweaving the rainbow" (a book I hate). I don't think I want antipsychotics. Obviously therapy is highly recommended and I'm for that. Should I be seeking a support group? Do I need to start actively destroying my perceived world view? Is it selfish to want to hold on to the magical thinking? Will those close to me benefit from me being medicated? Will I be the same person I was before knowing I was schizotypal?