Is it okay to tell a man I’m attracted to him, and that’s exactly why I don’t want to talk to him anymore?
I’m wondering if this would be an appropriate thing to say, or if I’m approaching it the wrong way.
There’s a man I’ve become attracted to. He is four years older than me, religious and Salafi. Our interactions have always been formal and respectful. We mostly talk when he asks me something about English, his Master’s studies, etc. I used to teach English when I was younger, around four years ago, so sometimes he asks me about things related to that.
Our conversations aren’t frequent or ongoing. There’s no unnecessary chatting, flirting, or random conversations. It’s basically a question and an answer, as I mentioned before, without small talk or talking just for the sake of talking. He is also respectful and maintains formal boundaries, and I do the same.
The problem is that I’ve been praying for a righteous husband for some time, and somehow I started thinking about him. I find myself unable to stop. Whenever he messages me to ask something or even asks how I’m doing, I end up thinking about him again afterward.
I’m also someone who really dislikes ambiguity or suppressing my feelings. I’ve reached a point where I’m thinking of simply telling him:
“I want to be honest with you. I’m attracted to you, and precisely because of that, I don’t think I should continue talking to you. I don’t want my feelings to develop into something beyond what our interactions have normally been, and I don’t want to get involved in anything that could lead me into something displeasing to Allah.”
I’m not telling him this because I expect anything from him or because I want him to confess his feelings. I actually mean the opposite: I want to remove myself from the situation before my feelings become stronger.
Would saying this be appropriate, especially considering that our conversations have always been formal and that he is religious? Or would it be better to simply distance myself without telling him why?
I’d appreciate honest advice, especially from an Islamic perspective.