u/StellaOC

Photo shared by Rachel DiCarlo on IG, captioned:

“Reunited with the infamous and legendary Susan Sokol — my very first boss and President of Calvin Klein Collection when I began my career in fashion sales (wholesale), all thanks to Susan hiring me in 1989! Susan ran a very tight ship and could be incredibly intimidating and stern, but maintaining the Calvin brand image in the ’90s was no small task — brand image was everything! Clean desks, a minimal and meticulous showroom… I can still vividly picture it all today. The minimal way we dressed — mainly in suits! Those years made such a lasting impression on me before I eventually moved into public relations. And also… funny story — back in the early ’90s, we used to take team photos on ‘show day.’ We called them our ‘class photos.’ The photo was the very first one I was ever part of… I was 22 years old! The OG girl power team. Such an incredible group of women — supportive, inspiring, so kind, and so much fun both in and out of work.”

In a 1996 The New York Times article, it mentioned that Carolyn was recommended to Susan Sokol by a traveling sales coordinator who had visited the Boston store. ''Carolyn fit the bill perfectly,'' said Sokol, who was then a president at Calvin Klein. ''She was absolutely charming, she was completely refreshing, she was completely outgoing. Here was a young woman, who wouldn't feel intimidated working with these kinds of people.''

I also wanted to share this memory from Barbara De Vries, who was hired by Calvin Klein in 1990 as director of design for the CK collections at Calvin Klein, from her Substack 'Stupid Model':

"I’m a few minutes late for my meeting with Carolyn. In my memory, she’s in a slightly elevated position, which can’t be right because the showroom is as flat as any room, and I am a few inches taller than her. She stands next to one of the large black display tables and smiles as if I’m a dear friend whom she hasn’t seen in ages. Her hug feels as warm and uplifting now as it did three decades ago. (It also feels melancholy, since the same memory came to me at the news of her death, only a few years later.)

Our meeting is a moment of happiness during an otherwise dreary, stressful winter day, as we’ll be spending time together choosing my Calvin Klein wardrobe for the following summer. Carolyn is wearing a forest green cashmere sweater over a long flowing CK Collection dress in a similar hue, and black leather boots. I wear a brown woolen CK Collection suit draped to fit as loose and easy as her dress. Her long hair is a tousled mix of light and dark shades of blond, the top layers more bleached than the hair below, which is the same color as mine. I have a boyish Linda cut.

We sit down at the wooden table on the infamous black floor that, for years, defined Calvin’s perfectionism. A cautionary tale for his designers, since the painters never got the color right. He wanted the darkest brown, verging on black, à la Christian Liaigre (the French architect who introduced the iconic blackened floor of the early nineties). To Calvin’s discerning eye, each new layer of the showroom floor was somehow too brown or too black, and eventually the wood was stripped and sanded so many times that it became too thin, and a whole new floor had to be installed. I tell Carolyn its history, the same way Zack had told me, like a rite of passage. We laugh, roll our eyes, and allow Calvin’s extravagance to set the tone for the spending spree that follows.

As Senior VP of CK Design, I have a large clothing allowance and twice a year, I review samples and line-sheets and pick my wardrobe for the next season. It’s the first time I do so with Carolyn’s guidance, who was just placed in charge of private orders. Together we review the Spring ‘93 collections and choose silk slip dresses, linen suits, cotton tops, jackets, pants, jeans, summer tees, linen sweaters and a long silk duster coat.

“Shall I throw in some underwear for your boyfriend?” she asks, as we finish the order. “Does he wear them? Do you like them?”

“Yes, he wears them. But no, I don’t really love it.” I say.

She frowns. “Why?”

“I just don’t like seeing the name of my boss in our bed. In my face. It kind of ruins foreplay.”

Carolyn laughs. Everyone always does. It’s my go-to joke when people ask if Alastair gets free Calvin Klein underwear."

Another memory shared by Elizabeth Hart who worked in the CK Sales Promotion & branding :

"I was there only from ’89–’91. I reported to Barry and Calvin but worked with Marty Staff, heading Sales Promotion and branding with licensees. A few of us were in temporary offices across from Barry while our offices were being built on another floor. When Carolyn was hired, she’d visit us to get away and chat, often sharing flowers from admirers. She reminded me of Elaine Irwin. She was stunning, smart, and effervescent. I loved her, and we’d walk to the train together because she was still living in CT.

I introduced her to my colorist in Greenwich, who gave her a “money piece.” I moved on and then out of state, and when I read that she was dating JFK Jr., it totally tracked. I hated that the press portrayed her as scared and shy—she was such a dynamic personality. The recent love-story craze has just made me sad. Since I worked in advertising with models over the years, people often ask me what it was like working with beautiful people. I’ve always said the most beautiful woman I ever met was Carolyn. Kelly was beautiful too—I didn’t really know her, though. I sat in a few design meetings with her, but that was about it."

I was on a business trip in California, hosted by Patrick Kennedy, when I heard the news, after Patrick left suddenly due to a “family matter.”

There’s so much more to say about my dozen years in the industry in the ’80s and ’90s. People romanticize how glamorous it must have been. It was a tough industry, but I’m grateful for the training I received, first from Ralph and then from Calvin. I used black paper clips before the memo. White flowers on ebony-washed oak. Clean necklines. Futura Light font..."

On this day 32 years ago, the world lost former first lady Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, who died in New York at the age of 64 after a battle with non-Hodgkin lymphoma. John addressed the crowd outside his mother's apartment on May 20, 1994: “Last night at around 10:15, my mother passed on. She was surrounded by her friends and her family and her books... the people and the things that she loved, and she did it in her own way, and in her own terms.... We all feel lucky for that, and now she's in God's hands.”

Following her death, John told his friends “You don't really grow up until both of your parents are gone."

Memory of Jackie’s final days shared by her friend Joe Armstrong:

Carly Simon and I had lunch with Jackie the day before she went to the hospital for the last time. That day was hard because she had no eyebrows, no eyelashes, and an ill-fitting wig, but she wanted to be upbeat. We had to act like it was a regular lunch, but my heart was just breaking inside because it was just, "Oh my gosh, she's so different." She said to me, "Four more weeks and I get my life back." And four more weeks and she was gone. She collapsed the next day, and she was taken to the hospital, and I never saw or heard from her again.

John and I were scheduled to have lunch the day she died. That morning he called and said, "Joe, I'm not gonna be able to have lunch today." I said, "How's Jackie doing?" He said, "Well, it's like a car speeding down the highway and parts are falling off." Carly Simon came over to my house because we'd spent time together with Jackie and we were praying, and I got a call from Marta [Sgubin], who was sort of the house guru, and she just said, "You might want to come over." Carly and I went over there, and Marta said, "I don't know if Jackie would want a man to see her like this." I said, "I’ll just wait here in the living room."

I talked to John and he walked us to the door. He just said, "Mummy really loved you two." He had tears about to start rolling down his cheeks. I'd never seen him be emotional. He took it really hard. And now he had to go be composed and be the spokesman.

Robert Littell also shared: “During one of many stress-relieving racquetball games we played that spring, John told me he was grateful that if his mother had to die from cancer, at least it wouldn't be a long battle. He said that she was comfortable with her own fate and that her comfort made him feel better. John stayed by her side as much as she wanted, making his peace with things in her presence.”

Russell Simmons talks with John F. Kennedy, Jr for One World, the lifestyle and entertainment magazine launched by Simmons in 1994:

On a recent drive with John F. Kennedy Jr. and his cousin Bobby Shriver to an event sponsored by GEORGE magazine, I decided to bring up a question I've had on my mind for quite some time. The question, of course, was what was it like for him to be married after his single life? To which he responded, "It is the difference between being in a horror house and a roller coaster."

Bobby and I, being bachelors responded by asking, "Which is which?"

All jokes aside, his answer stuck in my mind and I knew that the next 411 would have to be with him.

RS: Are you a big music fan?

JFK, Jr: Yeah, I listen to music. I try to keep up with what is current. I'm interested in what people in college listen to so I don't feel so old.

RS: Do you listen to Rap?

JFK, Jr: I listened to Dre's and Snoop's records when they first came out. But basically, I'm a rock and roll fan. My musical tastes haven't changed much since college. I think people like certain music because it reminds them of how they felt when they first heard the song. Now that I'm an old married guy I want to be reminded of how I felt in my carefree days way back when.

RS: What is the one thing that stands out on your publishing venture?

JFK, Jr: The irony-in that I got involved with GEORGE, despite the fact that I'm someone who's pursued by the press, and now I'm in the press business.

RS: What made you decide to get into publishing?

JFK, Jr: I think for people who were my parent's age, politics was the venue in which people felt they could influence public opinion-now it is the media. This has a lot to do with why I am putting out a magazine.

RS: To turn people on to politics?

JFK, Jr: I want GEORGE to turn a whole different group of people on to politics, people who thought that it was dull or dry.

RS: By making it popular?

JFK, Jr: Yes. I find it interesting to play by the same rules as people who use glossy or glamorous images to promote music or movies or sports. We want to entertain people like any other magazine. And once they are entertained maybe they'll get involved and go out and vote or join a cause. Ultimately, we hope people will be less cynical about politics.

RS: What things do you consider when choosing a cover? Your covers are quite interesting and different.

JFK, Jr: Since most of our sales are generated from the newsstand, I understand the importance of putting familiar faces on our cover such as Cindy Crawford or Charles Barkley or Tyra Banks. If Strom Thurman sold issues, I would put him on the cover. But, since our goal is to sell issues, we use provocative images by using people like Cindy or Charles.

RS: After an almost notorious single life, how are you finding married life?

JFK, Jr: This would be a good thought for you to ponder Russell. A partnership makes you stronger, and in addition to feeling very lucky to find the person that I did, it is a true revelation how much stronger you are when you unite with someone else.

RS: (Laughs) When I meet that person you'll be one of the first to know.

On October 16, 1993, John was in Asheville attending the wedding of his friend Joshua Tager, whom he had known since their time together at Brown University.

The Asheville Citizen-Times reported:

“Was that really John F. Kennedy Jr. who was spotted in several downtown Asheville locations last weekend? The son of the late president was in town for a weekend wedding at the green door on Carolina Lane, behind and below the Broadway Arts Building, said Bonnie Hobbs, who runs the gallery with her husband, David.

A Charlotte couple, Joshua Tager and Jane Anne Rolston, decided to be married in Asheville, and picked the green door for the occasion, Hobbs said. Kennedy attended as a friend of the groom, she said. Hobbs didn't even realize who the guest was until the evening was almost over, but reported that Kennedy was "very nice" and agreed to pose for a photo with David Hobbs, and the green door mascot-mannequin, “Bernie."

Kennedy was also spotted Friday night at Magnolia's Raw Bar and Grille on Market Street, and stopped in for a bit at the next-door Cinjade's nightclub. Kennedy didn't reveal his identity, said Diane Blackwell of Cinjade's. Cinjade's has hosted a number of stars over the years, from actor Daniel Day-Lewis to magician David Copperfield, Blackwell said.

Kennedy has been making tabloid headlines lately for his own reported upcoming marriage to film star Daryl Hannah, but she was not seen at the green door or Magnolia's.”

Shortly after Carolyn was photographed with John aboard his boat, the PT-109, in Martha’s Vineyard and dining with him at the Menemsha Galley on August 16, 1994, where a waitress reportedly described Carolyn as “beautiful and all over him,” the couple traveled to Washington State, spending several days in and around Poulsbo.

On Thursday, August 18, 1994, John and Carolyn dined at That’s A Some Italian Ristorante. The restaurant later framed John’s dinner receipt and dedicated Table 1 to the couple. John ordered the halibut with lemon-tarragon cream sauce, while Carolyn chose the chicken piccata. They shared a bottle of Pouilly-Fuissé wine with dinner. Afterward, the couple was reportedly seen dancing in the moonlight at Liberty Bay Waterfront Park.

The Seattle Times also reported that John was spotted shopping at Red Apple, a grocery store in Seattle’s Magnolia neighborhood. Cashier Myron Cross recalled that John purchased picnic supplies, including Ice House beer, Sprite, cheeses, chips, and deli specialties. According to Cross, John remarked, “I come here a lot to visit family friends.”

Carolyn was later seen with John at Newark Airport following their return from the trip, as reported by the New York Post on August 22, 1994. John was also reportedly seeing Julie Baker between dates with Carolyn, and A Current Affair reporter Lucy Cornachio told Fox News that she “saw JFK Jr. running by me on the beach and I followed him down and he joined a woman who looked very much like Julie Baker, and they lay down on some towels together and they looked like they were having a really good time.” On August 27, 1994, John attended the wedding of Anthony and Carole Radziwill in East Hampton without a date.

By Jeffrey Slonim for the August 1999 issue of Manhattan File:

I hesitate to write a word on this gruesomely sad subject. We've all noticed that the people running for the media micro-phones tended not to know Kennedy and Bassette very well, and I certainly didn't. I only met him and Carolyn a couple of times. One of my jobs at Allure and a few other magazines is to interview celebrities at events. And while there are few whose media auras I respond to, my heart used to pound when I approached the hypersexy, extraordinarily-looking young beauties. Almost no one in Hollywood-and I run into almost everyone-has a similar effect on me.

When John and Carolyn attended the party for the renovation of Grand Central Station, about three-quarters of the way through the dinner, they locked hands with a row of bodyguards to scoot out of the 42nd Street entrance. But the car wasn't ready, so the couple was just standing there staring awkwardly at the glass doors while large men wearing earplug headsets surrounded them. I'd seen them at four or five other events over the years, but that night I had a vaguely appropriate question to ask. So this would be my first time. I held my breath, approached, and asked John if it was alright to ask a question for Elle Decor.

"Yeah, sure," he agreed, graciously glad-handing me.

"What's next after minimalism?" I queried.

Eunice Shriver and John's brother-in-law Edwin Schlossberg had come up with terrific answers that night. And his mother, who had helped to save Grand Central Station, was such an aesthete that I assumed that an articulate answer would be forthcoming. But the huge, handsome smile immediately shot across young Kennedy's face as he looked at me, shaking his head.

"I'm sorry," he said, "but that is just so way beyond me." He was so candid, that we both just burst out laughing.

That night, and on other occasions, Carolyn tended to touch me when she answered-or didn't answer-my questions for Allure and, of course, with the long, satiny, gloved hand on my dinner jacket, and the field of her pale décolletage and shoulders, and bright silky blonde hair, I melted.

On May 19th, George held an exceedingly glamorous dinner at the Museum of the American Indian in the old Customs House. As cocktails were coming to a close, I was standing talking to Patrick McMullan and Kenneth Cole when Carolyn glided over and began chatting about her allergies with Patrick.

“I can't sit anywhere near you at dinner," she kidded him, "because we'd just talk about our allergies all night long."

Patrick reintroduced us, and she spoke warmly and unguardedly about Allure. She was just so thin, beautiful, and elegant, she could have said anything and worn anything and I would have been mesmerized. As the stately JFK Jr. and Paul Newman and most of the other guests proceeded into the polished marble dining room for the seated dinner, I quietly headed for the stairs to the street.

But out of the corner of my eye, I saw Carolyn rushing across the room towards me. At the door, she rested a hand on my shoulder. When she started whispering to me, it felt as if my face was burning. I was in shock.

"I've heard there have been some changes at Allure," she said quietly, "and I just wanted to tell you that I really hope everything goes well for you."

It was a big night for them, and she was looking me in the eyes. She meant it, and I really admired her. I practically felt tears welling up. Sometimes it gets lonely interviewing celebrities all night, but never really connecting. This was uniquely thoughtful and kind. And it made my night, made my week, really.

I came across these three stories about John on Facebook and thought they’d be great to share. I always enjoy reading things like this, personal encounters and memories shared by people who met him.

(1): Shared by ‘John-Hunter D :

“With all the buzz over FX's Love Story, I thought I’d share my encounter. About 30 years ago or so, I was waiting tables at a place called Park Avalon on Park Avenue South. During a lunch shift, I heard a small frenzy among some of the female staff and, as it turned out, JFK Jr. had just sat down with two other men dressed in suits. This was between his lawyer days and his George days. They were having a quick business lunch and were very focused, spreading papers and files across the table. I remember they ordered right away — no small talk — and asked for the check as soon as the food arrived. They finished lunch and left quickly, as if they were late for a meeting.

When I went over to clear the table, I couldn’t find the checkbook anywhere. I checked with the hostess and the bar to see if they had dropped it off there. No. I asked the other servers and bussers if they had picked it up. No. I went to the manager on duty and told him the check was missing, and I was basically told that if I didn’t find it, I’d have to pay for it out of my own pocket. I couldn’t believe I’d been stiffed by John-John!

About an hour later, the hostess and manager excitedly called me over and said I had a phone call. It was JFK Jr. — he called me personally! He explained that when they got to their meeting and he opened his briefcase, he realized he had accidentally scooped up the checkbook along with his papers. He called to apologize and added, “I hope you didn’t get into too much trouble because of me.” He then said he would send a messenger over to pay the bill. Sure enough, a messenger showed up a short time later with a manila envelope. Inside was the checkbook, cash to cover the bill, and a handwritten note. It hangs over my desk to this day and remains a very special memory every time I look at it.”

(2) Shared by David M :

“I have a story to share about JFK Jr. from when I worked at a hotel in Boston. I’ve never really spoken about it in detail until now, but in light of FX’s new Love Story, I figured I’d finally tell it. Between 1984 and 1986, I worked at the Parker House in Boston as the night audit manager. I generally worked from 10 PM to 6 AM and, after 2 AM, I was essentially the hotel’s night manager. I saw a lot of interesting things over the years, but the most memorable was a visit from JFK Jr.

Let me preface this by saying that the owners of the hotel at the time, the Dunfey family, were very good friends with the Kennedys. Ted Kennedy was often at Parker’s Bar, and other Kennedy family members visited on occasion as well. At roughly 2 AM, while I was auditing the books behind the front desk, an American Express card landed on the counter. I looked down at the card and saw the name John F. Kennedy Jr. I was in semi-shock.

I looked up and saw JFK Jr. standing there with a male friend and two gorgeous blonde women who looked like twins. I’m a straight man, but I can honestly say JFK Jr. was the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. I don’t know for certain whether either of the women was Daryl Hannah, but I don’t think so. I was a big fan of The Pope of Greenwich Village and several of her other movies, and I think I would have recognized her. Besides, these women definitely looked like twins, and neither had the aura of a movie star.

JFK Jr. and his friend didn’t have reservations, so I booked them into two separate mini-suites for $75 each. That was the unofficial Kennedy rate at the time. I also arranged complimentary room service for them. It wasn’t required, but I knew it would be appreciated by the Dunfey family.

One final thing: after I checked them in, one of my coworkers — who was gay and a huge fan of JFK Jr. — begged me for the carbon copies of his American Express receipt slips. I’m not sure what they’d be worth now, but if my friend still has them, I’m certain they’d be something to treasure.”

(3) Shared by Darby N:

“I walked by JFK Jr and Daryl Hannah in a jetway in Denver after they disembarked from an inbound flight on their way to Aspen. I was a flight attendant on my way to my plane a little early. They were having a disagreement, and I had heard a few crumbs of their verbal sparring long before they could see me. As I passed them on the isolated, long, narrow jet bridge, I kept my eyes focused forward, trying not to give any clue that I knew who they were. Would you believe they both apologized to me as I passed? I assured them it was no problem, but I never turned around to look at them. I wanted to, but I knew it wasn’t the right thing to do.”

Date: December 5, 1995

The part when Barbara asked him whether he had any plans to pursue a life in politics, and John replied, ‘I have a life to live before I want to think about that,’ is heartbreaking to listen to. So much potential was lost when he died.

I compiled quotes about Carolyn’s drug use from various books and interviews. Most of these accounts come from people in John’s circle, since, as many of you know, Carolyn’s friends have rarely spoken publicly about her. I also included sources who aren’t his friends. There’s no denying that she used cocaine, but in my opinion, that doesn’t necessarily mean she was an addict. Based on the quotes below, what conclusions do you draw?

The Day John Died (book): “It was equally clear to all who knew Carolyn the publicist that she was her own most important client. A regular at such trendy Manhattan clubs as Rex, the Buddha Bar, the Merc Bar, and MK, Bessette, like so many of her young colleagues in the fashion industry, developed a taste for cocaine. It did not, her friends would later insist, develop into a full-blown addiction. "She'd come in a lot," said MK's Eric Goode. "But she wasn't wild and crazy or anything."

Sons of Camelot (book): “When John came home at night from George, there were times when he was confronted by an enraged wife prowling the confines of the loft. Carolyn was on occasion doing cocaine. To her fashion world friends, it was not a problem; it was just part of the scene. Her therapist prescribed antidepressants that she took along with cocaine. She did not try to hide her drug use but did it in front of their friends. To most of them, it also was no big deal, just another of Carolyn's quirks. After her death there would be lurid rumors that she was a coke addict, an allegation contradicted by every one of John's close friends. "When was the last time a really good-looking, immensely healthy-looking drug addict passed your way," laughs Sasha.

Sasha Chermayeff (John's friend): “There was more stuff going on with her than I clearly knew about. There were more serious issues that I wasn't really privy to. Carolyn was in pain. It came from real dysfunction and was dysfunction. She was good at seeming really together but she actually wasn't. Maybe she was a coke addict, who knows?"

Rosemarie Terenzio (John's assistant): “Carolyn drank vodka and white wine. I know she and John both did coke with their friends recreationally. But I never saw her use drugs, and I never saw her drunk.”

Robert Littell (John's friend): “The stories of Carolyn's drug use are widely exaggerated. She definitely partied, sharing a joint and doing the occasional line of cocaine, but I saw no evidence that she had an addiction. I can't say if she took antidepressants, though it's possible. They help a lot of people. She rarely drank, I never saw her incapacitated, and I believe John would have told me if his wife was doing heroin or crack or Ecstasy. He was committed to a very health-conscious physical regimen by then, and Carolyn shared his devotion to the gym. She worked out ferociously, especially during the last year of her life, and seemed to be in top physical condition.”

Billy Noonan (John's friend): “Carolyn was using drugs, too, and it was taking a toll, making her nervous and sometimes paranoid, though, as someone once said, just because you're paranoid doesn't mean you don't have real enemies. Her behavior, and the way she was alienating people, was slopping over into John's world. As an international journalist friend of mine, trying to get some copy from me, commented, "Let's see if I have this right: The world's most eligible bachelor marries a druggy who won't leave the apartment, is that it?" … and in May 1999, Noonan said that John told him “Carolyn was better, she was in intense psychoanalysis: five days a week, plus medication for depression. The recreational drugs had stopped.”

The Kennedy Heirs (book): “At the end of a particularly bad week of being hounded by the press, Carolyn and John were at their home with Anthony Radziwill when a friend came by unexpectedly. He walked into the apartment just in time to see Carolyn doing a line of coke from the coffee table. Both she and John were feeling no pain, he recalled; Anthony didn't seem to be indulging. 'It's been a bad week, John told me as he sat down and did a line," recalled the intimate. "I said, 'John, what the hell is this? This is new. Is this your thing, or is it Carolyn's?' He laughed and said not to worry about it. 'Look, I'm a Kennedy. Do you think this is the first time I've ever done drugs? Please.' Then he lay down in Carolyn's lap. As she stroked his hair and kissed his forehead, they actually looked peaceful together, I had to admit.

"An hour later John said he had the munchies. 'You sure you want to go out there and have to deal with who knows what?' I asked him. He smiled at me and said, 'Sure. Bring 'em on.' He then took Carolyn by the hand, and off we went with Anthony to get some pizza.

John Perry Barlow (John's friend): “Coke really wasn't his thing. John told me he viewed coke as merely a mechanism for getting stoned, whereas he thought of acid and Ecstasy as a way to experience life differently, especially when things started to get out of control because of his relationship to Carolyn. At that point, anything he could do to create the space to put things in perspective was what he would want to do."

Kevin Hynes (John's friend): Hynes, who became friends with Kennedy when they were both New York prosecutors, believes he was planning to divorce his wife over her alleged drug use. "He told me he thought that he would have to divorce her. They'd been to a marriage counselor. They had been to drug counselors. John had looked into all sorts of potential help for her.”

Richard (Lasko) DuPont (John's friend): Richard duPont recalled bumping into John at a TriBeCa bistro called Walker's. "John began questioning me about how I'd recovered from my alcohol and cocaine addiction. He wanted to know about certain rehab clinics, such as Sierra Tucson and the Betty Ford Center. How did it work? What did they do? And so on. I didn't attach much importance to the conversation at the time, but afterward it occurred to me he might have been making inquiries because of Carolyn, though, to be fair, he never mentioned her by name."

Liz Smith (Gossip Columnist): “I once had a letter from Carolyn Bessette. It must have taken guts for her to write a gossip columnist, but she wanted to thank me for some incident regarding cocaine use in which I took her side.”

Julie Baker (John's ex-girlfriend/mistress): “John was conflicted about his marriage. He had heard from many of his friends that Carolyn was abusing cocaine. But she denied it. The biggest issue was whether he should stay with her or leave. John felt that Carolyn had stopped working on the marriage a long time ago. Why, then, should he work so hard to keep the marriage going?”

Sybil Hill (John's ex-girlfriend/mistress): "Carolyn Bessette was dangerously into cocaine. John told me he was miserable. The marriage was a sham. She took a lot of cocaine and Ecstasy and had Jekyll-and-Hyde mood swings."

Steve Gillon (John's friend): “Many close friends suspected that she had begun self-medicating, growing especially fond of cocaine One friend described being on Martha's Vineyard when Carolyn and John started having a loud, angry fight. Carolyn stormed out and did not return until the following morning, "all coked out." While John used cocaine occasionally, his drug of choice had always been marijuana, which he began smoking as a teen. He rarely drank alcohol, and when he did, it was usually beer or an occasional glass of wine. Carolyn used drugs to lift her spirits, while John used pot to calm his racing mind. Carolyn reluctantly attended the most important public events, but more often she hid at home, stewing in private and relying on cocaine to deal with the loneliness.”

Date: December 6, 1993

Theme: Diana Vreeland: Immoderate Style.

The 1993 Met Gala celebrated the Costume Institute exhibition Diana Vreeland: Immoderate Style, a tribute to the legendary Vogue editor and Costume Institute consultant who passed away in 1989. The exhibition and opening night honored Vreeland's dramatic, often surrealist approach to fashion and her transformative impact on costume exhibition. Velvet, furs and upswept coiffures were very much in evidence at the museum gala, whose setting was bathed in the blood-red light Vreeland loved and decorated with the animal prints she made so chic.

In tribute to Vreeland, many of the female guests wore her signature colors, red and black, to the black-tie affair. The evening raised more than $500,000 for the museum, drawing some 650 people at $900 a head.

Carolyn attended the gala with her Calvin Klein circle, bringing her friend and office mate Matt Nye as her date (which raises the question—why not Michael Bergin?). Carolyn wore a dress from Calvin Klein’s Spring/Summer 1993 collection. Some people assume this was taken at the 1992 Met Gala, but that’s incorrect. Matt Nye and Noona Smith Peterson, pictured above, didn’t join Calvin Klein until 1993, so they wouldn’t have been part of the group attending in 1992.

The photo above features Wayne Lukas (celebrity stylist); Matt Nye (Calvin Klein accessories designer); Terrence McFarland (Calvin Klein PR); Jessica Weinstein (Creative Services Director at Calvin Klein’s in-house agency, CRK Advertising); Victor Alfaro (designer); Sarah Lord (Director of Fabric for Calvin Klein’s women’s collection); and Noona Smith Peterson (Senior Vice President of Calvin Klein European Public Relations).

Date: December 5, 1988

Theme: From Queen to Empress: Victorian Dress, 1837–1877

Co-chair: Pat Buckley

Ticket price: $850 (approximately $2,330 today).

“When John and I went to clubs or went out dancing, Christina wasn't there. She didn't want to do that stuff. Christina liked the Met Gala, and she took him.... I think he was an unexpected guest, and he was miserable. There are pictures—she looks beautiful. We would joke about it: Christina made me go to the Met Ball.... That's the kind of thing he didn't wanna do.” - Jack Merrill (JFK Jr: Oral Biography).

Fun fact: Anna Wintour officially moved the Met Gala from its traditional November/December slot to the first Monday in May after taking the helm in 1995 to mark the start of the spring fashion season.

It’s often suggested that they should have moved out of the city or were considering property in the suburbs. However, these quotes indicate that neither John nor Carolyn had any interest in leaving.

On November 4, 1996, at the Whitney Museum, John denied a report that they will be leaving downtown for up: "No way. It's a great place to live, We're definitely staying there. We won't be driven out."

Carolyn also told a WWD editor, “I used to step over drunks and crack dealers to get to my apartment. Everybody at Calvin thought I was crazy, but I couldn't imagine coming to New York and living anywhere else. Even with all the weirdness, I felt comfortable and I had fun."

John’s close friend Christian Oberbeck recalled that Carolyn once said she would never move back to Greenwich, Connecticut. The two couples -John and Carolyn, Chris Oberbeck and his wife, Lizzie -occasionally got together for dinner.

“I'd invite them up to Greenwich, but Carolyn always refused. She'd say, I'm not going back to Greenwich.' So we'd meet at restaurants in New York. In her mind, I think she associated Greenwich with her past. She was on an upward path. John was already there. He'd always been there. He was born there. But at some point he began to question himself. He realized he had it all, but one day he asked himself: 'What am I doing with it?' I'm happy to report he found answers in Carolyn Bessette and in George, the political magazine he launched in late 1995."

July 31, 1997:

During the summer of 1997 John flew to Oshkosh, Wisconsin, to attend the weeklong Experimental Aircraft Association show with J. "Mac" McClellan, the editor of Flying. John had been delighted to meet the editor of his favorite magazine, also published by Hachette.

John had a spectacular week, flying with the legendary test pilot Chuck Yeager in a P-51, and going up in a B-17 as well. By the time he headed home he was obsessed with the idea of renewing his determination to learn to fly. "I'm not coming back here until I can fly myself," he said as he left.

There was no word that Kennedy had planned to come to the 1999 air show, but he did plan to come to a show when he had time, Tom Poberezny (president of the Experimental Aircraft Association (EAA) AirVenture Oshkosh) said. A letter he wrote to Poberezny said, in part: "Best of luck with your work at the EAA. The next time I see you at the air show, I intend to fly there... myself."

Kennedy came to the convention in the summer of 1997, and Poberezny remembered his intense interest in aviation.

"Aviation was one of his passions," said Poberezny, who has photographs of Kennedy at the convention hanging in his home. During his 1997 trip to Oshkosh, Kennedy made arrangements to purchase a two-seat ultralight aircraft from fellow EAA member and ultralight manufacturer Chris Howard of Argos, Indiana.

"When he was in Oshkosh in 1997 he said he felt like he was in heaven. I remember he certainly had that look on his face," Howard said. After Kennedy left the convention, he took an intense flying course at a flight academy in Florida and got his license. Before that, Kennedy had taken lessons sporadically because of a busy schedule, Poberezny said.

Sybil Hill recently made a statement on her (now private) Instagram about her past relationship with John and the “affair” narrative she’s discussed over the years. It seems she is now trying to walk back that version of events following the attention generated by the Love Story show.

She claims she became a public figure without her participation, but that’s hard to believe with her earlier actions. In January 2000, she chose to speak with the National Enquirer, where she shared personal details, provided letters and even a napkin with John’s phone number, and participated in a photoshoot accompanying the story. That shows a level of active participation and willingness in making the story public.

She also now says she never commented on his marriage, though she did make snarky remarks about Carolyn in past interviews, including conversations with tabloids like Radar Online as recently as February of this year. In 2016, she was working on a book about her relationship with John called “Painting Horses”, though it was never published.

For context, they did date in 1991, and she has said they met at the Moondance Diner on January 6 of that year, shortly after his breakup with Christina Haag.

Curious how others interpret the shift in her narrative now—similar to how Julie backtracked her narrative in 2024 about seeing John at the Stanhope after years of saying she had.

Link to her book: https://books.google.com/books/about/Painting_Horses.html?id=cuJVMQAACAAJ

Link to a post about her past with John: https://www.reddit.com/r/JohnAndCarolyn/comments/1me3w1d/whats_the_consensus_on_sybil_hill/

Link to a post of Sybil’s letters to John: https://www.reddit.com/r/JohnAndCarolyn/comments/1khp060/sybil_hills_johns_alleged_mistress_love_letter_to/

On July 25, 2004, Tina Radziwill (Anthony Radziwill’s sister) gave a few quotes to an Italian newspaper called “La Stampa” about John and Carolyn.

Tina shared (translated from Italian): “She was a very good person, very human. She didn't like the press and seemed aggressive, unfriendly but it wasn't like that, she was good. She was very close to my brother Anthony who was seriously ill and died shortly after John. She always went to see him".

Carolyn had entered into this family, carving out a slice of it for herself. She also had a very good relationship with Tina, for whom she had organized the engagement party. Many now write that their love was already dead when it sank into the ocean.

But Tina explains: "Ups and downs, like all couples. They were happy to come to my wedding in September, in Sicily, also because Carolyn's mother was from Messina. They had planned everything, even the cruise on the old family yacht, the Marlin, a 16-meter fast commuter, which Diego Della Valle (current owner) had put at their disposal. They had also booked the hotel in Syracuse, Grand Hotel Villa Politi. The reservation was made under a false name: Johnson. A.k.a. John's son."

Carole Radziwill also mentioned that she and Carolyn were planning Tina’s bridal shower, which was initially scheduled for August 10, 1999. Carole wrote: “It is summer at the beach, and Carolyn and I plan parties: Anthony's fortieth birthday, Tina s bridal shower. We address invitations and send them out. We call caterers and discuss finger foods as if it were any other summer. As if this year were something to celebrate.”

To me, it doesn’t seem like Carolyn was considering divorce—let alone separation—that summer, especially if she and John had plans to travel to Sicily in September 1999 for Tina’s wedding to Dr. Ottavio Arancio. They divorced in 2005.

Fun fact about the photos above: they were taken by Sasha Chermayeff, but Carole Radziwill neither credited her nor asked for permission to use them.

Photo: John Kennedy became restless while watching the Kamehameha day parade in Honolulu June 11th, 1966.

From the book ‘Kennedys: The Next Generation’ by Jonathan Slevin:

He had reached a difficult age-five. At an August 1966 family wedding at Hammersmith Farm, the Auchincloss estate in Newport, John fought with his cousins, tried to chase ponies into the reception tent, and spattered bathers with sand on nearby Bailey's Beach. "That boy travels 90 miles an hour, at right angles to everyone else," noted a wedding guest.

In June 1968, his uncle Bobby, who had become a surrogate father to John, was also assassinated. Later that year, John was uprooted again when he switched schools. He left St. David's, a Roman Catholic school a few blocks away from 1040 Fifth, that he'd attended since nursery school, to enter the third grade at Collegiate, a 361-year-old unaffiliated Protestant school. The newspapers reported that he had been taken out of St. David's because the school wanted him to repeat the second grade. He was described as restless, disruptive, and inattentive. Jackie was said to have told him, "Don't worry about your spelling. Your father couldn't spell very well, either."

Perhaps another reason for his removal from a Roman Catholic school was his mother's impending remar-riage-outside her church-to the Greek shipping mag-nate Aristotle Onassis. Their affair had blossomed that summer. Onassis spent a weekend at Hammersmith Farm with Jackie's mother, and then a few days with the children and grandmother Rose Kennedy in Hyannis Port. In October, just after Jackie and Onassis were wed on Skorpios, John and Caroline were sent home from Athens while their mother and Onassis honeymooned. Landing at John F. Kennedy International Airport, eight year old John frowned at photographers.

Onassis is said to have been a caring and generous stepfather. He invited Kennedy family and friends along on his and Jackie's summer voyages. "There was a kidding competition among our classmates to get to bicycle for a month on the deck of Ari's yacht," said a Collegiate pal of John's.

At the time, Jackie was said to consider the marriage to Onassis the perfect antidote to America's stifling fascination with her and her children. "If they're killing the Kennedys, then my children are targets," she said. "I want to get out of this country." The threat was real. "There were bomb scares on at least two occasions," said the Collegiate classmate. "We all understood them to be Kennedy-related." There were also "these two characters in the office with their feet on the desk and underarm holsters, reading The Daily News all day," referring to John's Secret Service detail. "John didn't love (having) them following him around."

To the public, John was the Prince of Camelot, but John just wanted to be fourteen and average. At Collegiate, he had found a perfect companion for his quest. The son of a Manhattan surgeon, Wilson McCray was a self-confessed rebel. He was the perfect friend to accompany John when he walked on the wild side. "John and I were in the same class and were really good friends. We were bad little boys," said McCray.

"When we were at Collegiate together, John and I used to run away from the Secret Service together and hang out in Central Park and play Frisbee. It was easy to run away from the Secret Service; they were just there for protocol, unnecessary. When we were about twelve, we went to Madison Square Garden and there was some general article about bad little boys drinking there. The reporter never realized that John was one of them so it was left out of the article."

At fourteen, the two stole a Volkswagen van while vacationing in Switzerland. "We went out and spun it around on the ice, drove it around, then drove it back," said McCray. Stealing the vehicle wasn't John's only illegal teenage escapade. At first, Caroline was his ally. "Caroline grew marijuana in Jackie's vegetable garden in Hyannis Port," said Barbara Gibson. "A patrolman discovered it and went to Jackie and told her. She said that she would deal with Caroline and John and that she wanted us to let her know immediately if anyone discovered them smoking pot or taking any other drugs."

Aaccording to Wilson McCray, John smoked marijuana during his teen years. “At school we were always getting caught for getting stoned," McCray said. There were no repercussions, and John grew more daring and took drugs in his mother's 1040 Fifth Avenue apartment. “We used to go up on John's roof and get stoned," Wilson said. "John would smoke grass in the bathroom."

McCray spent a great deal of time with John and Jackie, occasionally vacationing with them. From his point of view, despite John's wildness, his relationship with his mother remained good. "Like everybody, John had to lie to his mother and bend to her will," McCray said. "She is wild, eccentric and removed; yet very sweet, very fun and loving. She wasn't strict but she kept tabs on him.”

During the mid-seventies, John was listed in the Social Register. He was seeing a psychiatrist regularly, and changed schools again, transferring to Phillips Academy in Andover, Massachusetts. After being held back a year, he graduated in 1979. "He certainly wasn't at the top of his class," says a longtime friend.

John was known at all three private schools as bright, but more rebellious and troubled than Caroline. His most embarrassing teenage moment involved drinking. In 1978, he and Caroline celebrated their birthdays (his eighteenth, her twenty-first) with a bash at Le Club in New York, arranged by their mother. At five in the morning, as the party broke up, Kennedy and his school friends fought with a National Enquirer photographer. "I opened the door and John was lying in the gutter," recalled Patrick Shields, the club's director, who dusted him off and deposited him in a taxi. "Jackie's comment to me the next morning was 'I'm walking on a cloud." Shields didn't think she had seen the morning papers yet.

There have been at least four friends who have mentioned Carolyn’s interest in documentaries and filmmaking.

Joe McKenna: “She thought a lot about going back to work. It was hard for her, because she felt the press was always watching. One option she was exploring was film school.”

Hamilton South: While giving a eulogy at a memorial mass at St. Thomas More Church in New York City on July 23, 1999, Bessette-Kennedy's close friend, Hamilton South, said she wanted to someday have an office in Tribeca where she could make documentary films about people dealing with adversity.

"Her favorite phrase was, 'We need to talk.' That would be the beginning of a two- or three-hour telephone odyssey, a tour of Carolyn's horizon that revealed a range of interest that left you spinning - from this new book to that museum, from fashion to Walt Whitman, from what's in the paper to what's up in town. She could be highbrow and low-down. It left you breathless, exhausted, and hungry for more. To spoof herself, and to cover up what she was really doing, she'd say in these talks, 'Now let's remember, it's all about me.' She made it the permanent subject line in her e-mail: 'It's about me.' But that was just another of her secrets -it was never about her. When you talked to Carolyn it was all about you, and all about life.”

Carole Radziwill: Carole Radziwill said that, in the spring of 1999, she had spoken with Carolyn a good deal about getting into documentary filmmaking. "I was doing docs at ABC News, and she was always interested in illuminating other people's stories. I think, because of her upbringing, being raised by a single mom, she identified with the underdog, and now she was in a position to provide insight into the struggles and victories of ordinary people. That really appealed to her."

Unnamed friend quoted in Elizabeth Beller’s book: A friend with whom Carolyn discussed the possibility of documentary filmmaking explained: "It wasn't as simple as just jumping in and going for it. Creating a production company, studying the subject, as well as hiring crew is a labor-intensive job as it is. Carolyn, who was a perfectionist anyway, would need to be very deliberate indeed to actually begin the process of bringing light to stories of humanity that would teach us to not only think about others, but to put ourselves in their shoes-something at which she already specialized. To actually put her toe in the water would have required much more than the usual preparation. For her to even begin, she would've had to have everything one hundred percent locked down at the word go, every i dotted, and every t crossed, or the press would've torn her to shreds. She had only left her job at Calvin Klein two years prior. Add to that, she was on the tour to help save George, traveling constantly to secure ad sales and possibly new investors. For the time being, Carolyn's project would have to be put on ice."

From Cindy Crawford’s book ‘Becoming’:

“I can't remember exactly how the George cover happened, but I'm pretty sure Herb Ritts gave me a heads-up that John F. Kennedy Jr. was going to call me to talk about being on the cover of a new magazine he was-launching.

I had first met John at the twenty-first-birthday party my friend Mark Bozek hosted for me at B. Smith's in New York. At the time. John was on Page 6 every other day-riding his bike around Manhattan, dating so-and-so, or taking the bar exam. He was New York's most eligible bachelor, and I was excited to meet him. Nothing much came of that first meeting, and when I ran into him at other parties and functions, he was always a perfect gentleman.

Nonetheless, I was curious to hear what he had to say. I couldn't help but be flattered that he asked me to be on the cover of his debut issue. Herb was set to be the photographer. All the pieces were falling into place except one tiny thing the concept. Since the magazine was called George and covered politics and pop culture, John and Herb wanted me to dress as George Washington-wig and all! How was I going to look sexy in that? Now, if anyone could pull this off. it would be Herb, but I still had my reservations.

On the day of the shoot, I drove to Smashbox Studios in Culver City: Los Angeles. Herb's talented team had definitely gotten the memo. Carol Shaw did beautiful, if slightly powdered makeup. Peter Savic had created an amazing wig that was a dead ringer for the George Washington I saw on one-dollar bills. Stylist Kate Harrington had gone to a costume house to find an authentic Revolutionary War outfit and then had it tailored. The pants fit like a glove, and she even stuffed the crotch with a rolled-up sock, literally giving me the balls to become our founding father. But her genius, and the thing that really makes this picture work, was her decision to crop the shirt to show my bare midriff. It introduced sexuality to what could have become a camp and predictable image.

I've realized that often it's not the most beautiful pictures that stick in people's minds and become the most iconic. Do I think this is the prettiest picture of me? No. But Herb's ability to turn me into a modern, sexy George Washington. one that helped create the prototype for John F. Kennedy Jr's magazine, caught the imagination of the country. I'll never forget how proud John looked that day as he spun around the cover of his passion project and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, meet George I have to admit. I was pretty proud, too.”

Matt Berman, George Magazine creative director:

“"Herb Ritts is in town, he's a friend, and we're going to talk about the cover." How could I impress Herb Ritts, whơ'd shot a million magazine covers and had twenty-five coffee table books in every bookstore? "Come over at eight or so," John said, walking away. I arrived at John's house way too early and circled the block to kill some time. After a few laps, I rang his buzzer. "Herb? Matt? I can't hear you." John's voice echoed out onto North Moore Street. I shouted, "It's Matt," and heard the front door unlatch. John offered me a Rolling Rock. I sat down and tried to look comfortable. Carolyn sprawled next to me, putting her arm on the back of the sofa behind my head.

Herb arrived and John introduced me. Herb was warm and friendly, and I liked him immediately. John led us to a nondescript local restaurant, not exactly a health food place but almost. We started firing off ideas about who should be on the cover. Within five minutes, we'd mentioned every celebrity in Hollywood. We knew the person had to be an American; apple pie with an edge.

John suggested President Clinton, but that seemed too obvious. Herb said, “How about Cindy?" Not being on a first-name basis with any celebrities except the ones at the table, I wasn't sure who he meant. Carolyn jumped in, “Cindy Crawford's perfect. She's all-American, a self-made woman, sexy, strong, and smart." Carolyn's infectious enthusiasm carried the day.

…Herb asked me what I thought of the idea of stuffing a sock down Cindy's pants. John didn't mind a little shock value, but I didn't feel that chicks with dicks was what he had in mind. Herb said, "Let's do it and we can always take it out later." I knew John would think it was totally gross, but I rolled with it.

About a week after the cover shoot, I received a FedEx package from Herb's studio. I took the box into my office and shut the door. Inside was a thick pile of contact sheets with X's in red grease pencil by some images, circles around others, and stars and circles around others. I brought John into my office and waited for a reaction. The whole thing could have backfired if Cindy hadn't looked gorgeous, but I was pretty sure he'd be pleased, because she looked like George Washington but was beautiful. He was thrilled. And then his attention went right to Cindy's groin. "Maestro, what the f*ck?" I assured him the bulge was removable.

John looked at the final layout and was irritated that the I's of the words Inaugural Issue didn't have serifs. It was a sans serif font, Antique Olive, almost sacred in Paris because it is the beloved logotype of Air France. I had gotten my way with so many bigger things that I agreed to customize the I's and draw serifs on them.

I thought no one would notice, but Jean-Louis saw the change with a glance. "Matt, you have completely destroyed the integrity of the font." I knew that Jean-Louis was right, but John had signed off on so many of my ideas that I felt it was a very small price to pay to make him comfortable.

John, Michael, and Jean-Louis approved the cover design. I sat with Michelle to perfect the details. Michelle zoomed in on the image to check a measurement, and Cindy's face filled an oversized monitor. "Wow," I said to Michelle, "this really looks like something."

(Second Photo above is from Matt’s book, JFK Jr, George & Me. The caption said ‘John's and my first crack at a cover idea over too many beers: Cindy Crawford covered in one-dollar bills-we nixed it because it looked too much like a financial magazine.’)

Robert Littell: “When he was in the city, John worked a lot and worked out a lot. His discipline was remarkable, though it was probably not as much of a sacrifice as it looked since he truly enjoyed physical exertion to say nothing of his enjoyment in looking good. He drank in moderation, didn't smoke (except when rendered jelly by a woman), ate vast quantities of healthy food, and maintained a large number of athletic-club memberships.

He belonged to La Palestra, the superluxe buffing center owned by John's good friend Pat Mannochia, as well as the New York Athletic Club, the Downtown Athletic Club, Equinox, Radu's Physical Culture Studio, and the Downtown Boat House. This meant he had a gym in practically every zip code and a well-developed set of pecs. But he had a special affection for the Downtown Athletic Club (DAC) because of its stuck-in-time, old Wall Street charm.

The DAC was where we continued the racquetball competition we'd begun in college. John loved to swim there, take long steams, get massages, and chill out in the TV room. Sometimes we watched the start of a Knicks game before heading down to the Mowbray Room on the third floor for the absolute best worst food in Manhattan. He was on friendly terms with everybody in the building, particularly a good-natured waiter named Victor who had the unenviable task of delivering the barely edible food to John's table. Without a two-hour dehydrating workout beforehand, even the bottled water tasted bad. But the Downtown Athletic Club had more charm than any other gym in the city.

The one thing in his life that John could control was his body. His good looks were genetic. His family name was a birthright. But he, and he alone, was responsible for transforming himself from an awkward, scrawny kid into an Adonis. He spent a lot of time at the gym building up his body, not just out of vanity, but because he could control it—he could decide how big his body was going to get. I think that's one of the reasons he took great pride in it. It was all through hard work that he had put in. He had spent long hours laboring at the gym, working with trainers, pushing himself to his limit to build muscle mass and burn fat.”

John Hanrahan: “John worked out with me at La Palestra in NYC. He was such a great guy. He loved to vary his training and took whatever I threw at him. Walking lunges while carrying a weighted Olympic bar across his neck? A mix of heavy-duty circuit modalities? He loved it all. One day he was finishing some ab work on the wrestling mat and my four year old son Colin came running into the gym and jumped right on his gut knocking the wind out of him. John just laughed like it was part of my workout plan. Sure he sometimes felt like an accident waiting to happen- I once saw him pedal off to Central Park on his bike with his roller blades still on his feet- but that's just who he was. He charmed everyone, and as People's "Sexiest Man Alive", the girls who freshened up the locker room never complained that he left every towel in the place on the floor between his locker and shower."

Radu Teodorescu, owner of Radu's Physical Culture gym: One of the people most responsible for helping mold John's physique and keeping him in prime shape was Radu Teodorescu, whose Physical Culture Studio on West 57th Street in Manhattan soon became JFK Jr.'s second home. With a well-deserved reputation as the toughest personal trainer in town, Radu gradually established a friendship with John.

“I became his personal trainer, but we also became friends outside the gym. Sometime in the summer of '83 or '84, he came to my gym at 41 West 57th Street. Some things in life, you remember—I vividly see him coming in the gym. The elevator opened, and this guy came inside: a sinewy, athletic-looking guy with Rollerblades over his right shoulder and sunglasses on top of his curly hair. New York magazine called me the toughest trainer in town. Everybody wanted to come to my gym because it was the most challenging class. I had all the movie stars, models coming.... John had a great magnetism. He enjoyed being pushed to extremes. He had enormous resolve.

The class was very challenging. I told those macho guys-scuba divers, track people, basketball players, you name it—I said, "Listen, don't try to keep up with these regulars because this class is demanding different qualities and you'll have a very negative reaction. You'll go to the bathroom and throw up." But John, he right away jumped into the class. After the class, I said, "Listen, you did very well. I'm really very surprised you didn't throw up." "Really? People throw up?" "Yeah, but you didn't. Congratulations."

I had him doing exercises on the rings, the trapeze, the high bar, and on the mat. He didn't exercise simply to enhance his appearance, but because he wanted to learn how to control his body. Mother Nature blessed him with good looks and a strong physique. He wanted to go beyond that, to understand how the body functioned. He was a risk taker, but he didn't undertake dangerous pursuits without first preparing himself for them. He took himself seriously enough to exercise care, so that even when it appeared he was being reckless, he really wasn't. He used to ride his bike through the streets of New York like a madman, weaving in and out of traffic at top speed. He did the same on Rollerblades.

When John came to train with me, It's because he loves going on adventures. He's always looking to raise his fitness level to help him meet a new challenge. One time it was for a biking trek; another for a kayaking trip in the Red Sea. He'll tell me what new journey he's getting ready for, and I'll put together a quick program to help get him ready. He'll come in and say, "Hey, Radu, I'm going kayaking in the Red Sea. Gotta get in shape." Then I tell him what he needs to do, and he has the knowledge of exercise and his own body's power and limitations-to go off on his own and do it. He's always functioning at 80 percent of his physical potential, so that when a new and exciting challenge or task comes his way, it is nothing for him to bring himself to 100 percent."

Brian Steel: “John and I were at Radu. It was all sorts of calisthenics, push-ups, chin-ups, and nonstop activity, which John loved. The music was really loud, and John was next to me and there were maybe twenty people in the class, and John whispers something to me and I can't hear him, so I'm like, "What? What?" All of a sudden, he says, at the exact moment that the music goes off, he screams, you see Cindy Crawford?" Everyone turned to look. He was so mad at me and embarrassed.”

Steve Gillon: "The one thing in his life that John could control was his body. He spent a lot of time at the gym building up his body, not just out of vanity, but because he could control it—he could decide how big his body was going to get. I think that's one of the reasons he took great pride in it. It was all through hard work that he had put in. John never met a mirror he did not like, and he enjoyed showing off his body, even in rather inappropriate ways.

Our routine was to lift weights before engaging in intense games of racquetball. Afterward, we would put on our bathing suits and sit in the hot tub or take a steam. There was a sauna in the men's locker room, but the "wet" area with the steam room and hot tub was coed. One day John forgot his bathing suit, so he put on his stretched white underwear and started walking out to go into the hot tub.

“John," I said, "you can't go out there like that." He responded, "Stevie, why are you so modest for me?" I wasn't sure what he meant, but we went anyway. We would then take showers and enter the men's sauna wearing only our towels. John would often strip away the towel, inspect his private parts in full view of other people in the room, or get down on the floor to do pushups.“

Joe Bruno: “JFK Jr. was a member of the Downtown Athletic Club and in the late 1980's we both used to work out at the 7th floor gym, around 5-6 pm weekdays. We really didn't know each other personally, but one time he asked me to spot him on the bench press. After that, we'd spot each other on occasions. And we developed a casual gym-type relationship. He had a solid build, but not bulky, with huge calf muscles. Maybe the biggest calf muscles I've ever seen. He constantly checked himself out in the gym mirrors, too. From all angles. Flexing his muscles. Truth is, if I were that handsome and buff, I'd be doing the mirror bit too.”