I’m a bridesmaid in my best friends wedding and my boyfriend isn’t invited.
My best friend of almost 3 years asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding and I of course said yes. She isn’t having a maid of honor but I’m standing right next to her in her wedding and that’s essentially my role. I’ve been happy for her and her fiancé up until she told me her fiancé said my boyfriend isn’t invited. He said he doesn’t want a cheater at his wedding. Here’s some backstory: My boyfriend and I met the summer of 2023 and I moved in with him August 2025. After 3 weeks of living together I found flirty messages he was sending to other girls and we broke up. We were both going through some things at the time and I only moved in because my lease was up and I hadn’t found a new place. We took some time apart and got back together in December. We have since worked through things and have been happily living together since April 2026. Our relationship has not been perfect by any means but we love each other and make it work. Her relationship is by no means perfect either. She’s told me about an incident where her fiancé was messaging girls on instagram and lied about it until he eventually blocked her, which just makes it seem a little hypocritical. Her wedding is in May 2027 and I have been along for the ride touring venues, and will be part of planning her bachelorette, etc. I can’t help but be a little down any time she brings up her wedding knowing I would have to go alone. How do I stand next to her during her wedding and celebrate their love when the person I love doesn’t get to be there? I understand it’s their wedding and they are free to invite who they want, but he’d just be my plus one, not actually in the wedding. It almost feels like I have to choose between my boyfriend and my friend. If I go without him, he’ll be hurt, but if I don’t go, she’ll be hurt. The four of us have also hung out together multiple times since my bf and I got back together and everything has been fine. Everyone gets along and has fun, which is partly why I was shocked when she told me. There’s still time for things to change, but I have no idea what to do if her fiance doesn’t change his mind. Even if he does, the whole situation has me feeling some type of way. I haven’t told my boyfriend any of this because I know he’d not only be hurt, but probably not ever want to hang out with them again. My friend has also made it seem like he was included and going to be a guest, so now it’s not just that he isn’t invited, he’d basically be uninvited. I’m not sure how to bring this up to her or my boyfriend, or if I even should.