Spouse has lost almost everything. But hasn’t hit rock bottom.
My spouse is a Vyvanse/Adderall addict. He’s been in active addiction since 2021/22… the longest he’s going is 30 days. Since that thirty days the script goes way faster this time. Every month since 2022 at least he has said he will get off of them and then never does. Last month he filled and I chose to separate. Told him I wouldn’t come back to him or allow him in our house with drugs or alcohol. He spiral, filled about 2 weeks ago. And I called him out on it and of course he lied. I seen him at about 7 days and could tell he was WD and wanted to stay in bed. I just seen him again last night and he his knees just wouldn’t stop shaking. Which he has significant adhd. Always has shook his knees because he can’t sit still but last night it was so bad. Maybe I had just grown use to seeing it. Today he stopped sharing his location. I honestly don’t know what to do? He currently is staying in an RV. I stopped paying his bills. He makes BARELY enough to make the payment on that, his truck and rent. Sadly, the truck and RV that he is in our his moms and she said he’s close to having those repossessed. I tell him no when he asks for money. He uses THC when he’s off meds to cope or alcohol. He drives under the influence of something all the time. He is super reckless and impulsive. He asked for the kids and I said no because of that. What do I do next? Will he actually get clean in rehab? What it take for this kind of addict to go to rehab? Or to get clean and stay clean? Both of us have been long followers of stop speeding. I’m doing my part by not enabling and encouraging him to go. Hell my own brother runs a recovery. He’s offered to take him. But my spouse always wants something before he will go. Get me a computer, or this time it was get me the job that I want up there and I’ll go. (This recovery is a year program and requires you to work). I just feel stuck. I know I can’t control it, but I know what I’m feeling is like how the hell do I help push him to rock bottom? Should I cut contact with myself and the kids? File for legal separation? Divorce? He’s already lost a vehicle to repossession, two jobs, we had to sell our custom build home, he’s blown through his retirement and his mother’s. I had a talk to her today but stop giving him money. Don’t help him. Because it just keeps him comfortable on his addiction. Idk this place has been the best place for the best brutally honest advice and that’s why I came here. Thanks