Am I being unreasonable for wanting a small henna night?
Salam alaykum,
I need honest opinions on a disagreement I’m having with my fiancé about our wedding.
We’re planning a very simple wedding in 2027 (around 30 guests max) because we also want to buy a house shortly after, so we’re trying to be very careful with money. He strongly prefers a minimal wedding and wants to keep everything as simple as possible. He is also okay with us having a nice honeymoon to a destination I choose.
On my side, I completely understand and respect his vision and the financial priorities. However, I would also really like to have a small henna night just for women (close friends, my mother’s friends, and both of our female relatives). It’s something culturally and emotionally important to me and my mother. It would be very simple: decoration, music (DJ), and a small gathering. I would cover most of the cost myself.
He is against it because he sees it as an unnecessary extra expense and believes everything should be included in one single event.
I feel torn because I don’t want to create financial tension or delay our goals, but I also feel like I might regret not having this moment that means a lot to me.
Do you think this kind of compromise is reasonable in a Muslim marriage, or is his refusal justified?