How do I handle a delusional comedy friend when we co-run our only local room?
(Throwaway account to stay anonymous.)
I need some advice on a tricky situation with a stand-up friend. We started doing comedy around the same time, but my progression has been much faster. I write a lot, I'm getting bigger gigs, and I've started doing MC and feature spots for established touring comedians.
Recently, I got her a guest spot on one of these bigger gigs. Instead of doing her best tight set, she brought up only new, untested material and completely bombed. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not the end of the world, but it was uncomfortable and reflected poorly on me since I vouched for her.
The bigger issue is that I can't bring her backstage anymore. She has zero situational awareness and cannot read a room. She doesn’t get drunk or use drugs, but she’s just incredibly loud and tactless around professionals.
Whenever I book a bigger gig, it doesn't take long before I get a text from her. It’s always a passive-aggressive, backhanded congratulations that clearly stems from jealousy.
To make matters worse, her material isn't getting any better. It’s stiff, hacky, and leans into cheap, dirty humor in a way that just isn't funny. I really don't want to be associated with her style of comedy, and I definitely can't bring her on the road as an opener. Yet, she genuinely believes we are at the exact same level. She even talks down to beginners, eagerly lecturing and preaching to them like she's a veteran.
Here is the catch: we co-run local club nights together. We live in an area with basically no local comedy scene, so we have to travel a lot to perform otherwise. We run these local nights just so we can get reps in and stay sharp. Because I need this local stage time, I can't just cut ties with her completely, but the dynamic is becoming really exhausting.
What should I do here? Has anyone navigated a similar situation with a peer? Do I just keep my distance, set strict boundaries, and hope something changes, or is there a better way to handle this without destroying our local room?
TL;DR: I'm outgrowing a comedy peer who is jealous, bombs on gigs I get her, lacks backstage etiquette, and is delusional about her skill level. We co-run our only local room, so I can't just cut her off. How do I handle this?