r/Standup

(Throwaway account to stay anonymous.)

I need some advice on a tricky situation with a stand-up friend. We started doing comedy around the same time, but my progression has been much faster. I write a lot, I'm getting bigger gigs, and I've started doing MC and feature spots for established touring comedians.

Recently, I got her a guest spot on one of these bigger gigs. Instead of doing her best tight set, she brought up only new, untested material and completely bombed. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not the end of the world, but it was uncomfortable and reflected poorly on me since I vouched for her.

The bigger issue is that I can't bring her backstage anymore. She has zero situational awareness and cannot read a room. She doesn’t get drunk or use drugs, but she’s just incredibly loud and tactless around professionals.

Whenever I book a bigger gig, it doesn't take long before I get a text from her. It’s always a passive-aggressive, backhanded congratulations that clearly stems from jealousy.

To make matters worse, her material isn't getting any better. It’s stiff, hacky, and leans into cheap, dirty humor in a way that just isn't funny. I really don't want to be associated with her style of comedy, and I definitely can't bring her on the road as an opener. Yet, she genuinely believes we are at the exact same level. She even talks down to beginners, eagerly lecturing and preaching to them like she's a veteran.

Here is the catch: we co-run local club nights together. We live in an area with basically no local comedy scene, so we have to travel a lot to perform otherwise. We run these local nights just so we can get reps in and stay sharp. Because I need this local stage time, I can't just cut ties with her completely, but the dynamic is becoming really exhausting.

What should I do here? Has anyone navigated a similar situation with a peer? Do I just keep my distance, set strict boundaries, and hope something changes, or is there a better way to handle this without destroying our local room?

TL;DR: I'm outgrowing a comedy peer who is jealous, bombs on gigs I get her, lacks backstage etiquette, and is delusional about her skill level. We co-run our only local room, so I can't just cut her off. How do I handle this?

Idk if this is the right sub for this but I wanted to get opinions from real comedians so here goes. I was in the audience at a show tonight, and I think one of the comedians was flirting with me during his set. There were some suggestive comments and lots of eye contact. We had also had a short interaction before the show started (I didn’t realize he was a comic till he walked on stage).

I looked for him after the show to say hi but he wasn’t around. So comedians of Reddit, I come to you instead with these questions - have you ever/how often do you hit on someone in the audience while you’re on stage? What are the odds that he was actually hitting on me, and that it wasn’t just part of his set to [interact with any woman sitting in the front row]?

To be clear - I didn’t feel uncomfortable, his set was great and I was laughing throughout. I’m just wondering how likely it is that he was actually shooting his shot and not just using me for the punchline.

Also would it have been appropriate for me to flirt back during his set? (I didn’t say anything because I didn’t wanna heckle but I was laughing a lot.) Would it have been creepy/inappropriate for me to talk to him after the show since I’d kinda be hitting on him at his work? Would it be creepy to message him on social media now to shoot my shot? Help a girl out.

I know it’s important to get our reps up but a spot where it’s nearly empty is there still a reason?

If a joke is genuinely funny then even a shitty retelling could get laughs. Delivery just puts the cherry on top.

Why don't they do a presentation with standup s like PPT with ted talks with memes

There are a few YT people posting audio from standup bits and miming. One in particular Sarah Elizabeth Hyde may or may not credit the comic in the comments or description (sometimes she doesn't credit the creator at all). A somewhat talented mime - her videos are monetized with patreon and some are sponsored - so she's getting paid. No idea if the creators are aware and approve but if they aren't and they don't to me this is 10x worse than joke theft as most of the heavy lifting was done by the uncompensated (and sometimes uncredited) comic. But I'd love to hear you all's opinions on the subject.

I get to do shows a decent amount. More opportunities come my way because I work hard to get them. Not really getting paid as much as I like but the amount of stage time is amazing. With that being said. The people I started out doing standup with have been weird recently. Its made me feel a bit lonely. Sometimes I can sense they are jealous or resentful (mainly by how they react when I share good news). Which makes me feel weird because I always celebrate their wins. I want us all to win but some of them just don't work hard enough. Like I really want to do this as a career and not treat it like a hobby. Any thoughts!?