u/Sufficient-Dare-2381

I did a successful heist!!! I waited patiently until the human leaved the room and then quick quick I goed to her bag for going away and taked out her food box and I eated it up so good!!!

When human comed back she was all like: why you eated left over salad??? Was just carrots and leaves, not even dressing???

I think she was trying to cover up how good I eated it all up and what a great amazing crime I doed! Picture is of me with my purple monster that I getted at the store by picking it up super duper quick and then the human agreed that we had to get it.

Hello pawyers,
I suffered a huge injustice. Next to mine house lives two old people and they is the greatest and my favoritest and I adores them. I would like to hang out with them every day all the days but some days we don’t.

If we don’t for around one or two days I will inform the human that she clearly forgotted about it and that we should go over. Is very easy to get there cause you can just go into the backyard and then there is a door that you can just pull (even I can pull) and then you go to their door and maybe if they don’t react fast enough or your human is crazy slow and not helping by knocking for you, you might need to bark. But then they will open the door and say Hi, Willy!!! And then you can wag your tail crazy fast and be super duper happy and then maybe they give you a tasty stick and also some treats and also often some cheese and you can be even more super duper happy.

Anyway, I hadn't seen them in probably forever. I usually don't go out by myself into the backyard cause being alone is kinda stupid and I could instead also just go on a walk so idk why the human was so surprised that I runned straight for the old people's house. She called me, but I decided to wait in front of the door. Probably soon someone will open, I figured. But my stupid human comed and picked me up and carried me back into my house. She claims they went on holiday??? But why without me???

I also loves going on holiday, guys! I went before and then I had another bed but it was still comfy and I walked up a mountain and hanged out by a lake and it was a fun time. Why would the old people do fun stuff without me even though they loves me so much? This is no fair. Can I soo for holiday with all my friends???

Also, when they comed back and we goed over to hang out and they talked long time but they claimed they had none cheese cause they had not gone shopping yet. I really wanted some cheese and looked at their cold box very sad. They only gived me a tasty stick and a walnut. This is also no fair. Pictures are of me dreaming of the cheese and also me looking at my old friend whom I love so very much.

Hello pawyers,
Today I goed on a walk, as I do all the days. My human wanted us to walk around near some trees and grass but I have smelled literally millions of trees in my life. I insisted on walking at the street with the stores and the people and if the human went the wrong day I just sat down and stopped moving.

Is much better cause this way people can look at me and say oh, what a cute dog! Like for example, an old lady saied hi to me and a little human called me a baby dog (I is all grown up but I still liked the pets and was happy).

I do not understand why the human is so difficult. Does she not love me the mostest???

At home she tried to cut off my toes (claims just trimming my nails but idk). Also, she gived me barely any cheese even though I saw her eating it and I asked very clearly!!! Also, when she drinked some water in bed I requested some and she said I should just drink mine but mine was all the way down on the floor. I was in bed and tired! I think she needs to be more considerate of my feelings. Is it the law to walk the right way and keep your nails and share??? Picture is me sleeping on a bone which the human didn‘t want in the bed and so I had to go to sofa with it and she still put it on floor again??? Rude.

Hello pawyers,

the other day, one of my best friends comed over, is a nice lady. I has stayed at her house before, but this time she stayed at mine. Mine human, who always stays here cause we live together, said is her mom. This not that important, important is that she is a super nice lady. She bringed me a toy and this made me so happy that I bited of its head right away (see picture).

In the evening, when it was time for long relax the nice lady went to my big bed. This is not an issue, in my opinion, cause it is a big bed and I was planning on cuddling with her anyway. But I was also planning on cuddling with my human who for some reason decided to lie down on some soft stuff she put on the floor?

Because of this way I had to decide between humans and that was just soooo stupid. I went up to the bed and I looked at my human and I telled her to come here NOW! But she did not listen. I thinks she is not supporting my friendship with the nice lady enough. In the night, I kept having to switch where I was sleeping cause I wanted to cuddle with everybody and then I was tired.

The next day, we walked to the underground train station with the lady. I thinked super cool we can ride the train together. I am train expert and was willing to show the nice lady how trains work. But she went to the train without me??? My human forced me (cruelly) to stay outside the station. Then she tried to (cruelly) force me to walk home EVEN THOUGH I WAS TIRED! So I just remained seated. She has two perfectly good arms and can carry me, if she’d like and in the end she did. But she still tried to make me walk (SEVERAL TIMES) and that can’t be legal. Also is she legally required to help me hang out better with my friends??? Can I soo???