I found out he was way more sexually active with his ex-wife & it kills me
I originally posted this in the DeadBedrooms subreddit but the commenters were MEAN over there. I can’t figure out why I deserved that ☹️ So I deleted & figured I’d try again in this sub, in hopes of some kindness here.
My man is divorced from his ex for about 5 yrs. He and I have been together for the past 2 yrs, but over the past year, have dwindled down on the frequency of sex. Like 1-2 times per month MAX. I am an extremely good communicator, so I have told him several times in a calm/clear way, that this is not meeting my needs, I’m feeling hurt and undesired, what can I do to help improve from my end, etc etc etc etc.
He always says the same thing: “it’s not you, it’s just a me problem…” but he REFUSES to communicate healthily & define an actual problem.
I’m not sure what compelled me to ask yesterday (and I regret doing so because I hurt my own feelings), but I asked what the frequency was with his ex-wife. He said 2x PER WEEK. It makes me feel so sick, and retroactively jealous, that she was getting her needs met 2x a week easily, and I can only get my needs met 2x a month if I’m lucky. It sounds evident that the problem IS ACTUALLY me, but he won’t admit it ☹️ Any advice? Am I taking this too seriously? Is there another layer here that’s contributing to my RJ? Idk. Thank you