My issue with the performative "cool/weird" persona
I think about this a lot because as I'm closer to graduate college I keep encountering this kind of people, specially young women and girls (essentially because that's the demographic I'm part of) who claime to have this coolness or weirdness about them that makes them so unique and artsy but in reality it's all a curated performance that they're putting for others.
The reason why it rubs me the wrong way comes from the fact that through middle school and highschool I was deemed "weird" but not in a chic or cute way, I was excluded from groups, it was hard for me to make friends, I was struggling with mental issues that were later on diagnosed, I was more quiet and the list goes on; it was never something that gave me the opportunity to connect with people, totally the opposite.
Then you get to college and you meet this kind of girl that claims to be so different and weird when the reality is that they have crafted this very aesthetically looking persona who likes "very niche things" that aren't even niche and there's nothing wrong with it; but then they want to be friends with you because there's something truly different about you that makes you genuinely an interesting person (call it development, call it trauma, it could be a hundred different things). It also plays a part in the fact that once I got diagnosed I worked on myself, a glow up happened because of puberty of course so now I'm conventionally attractive and have a set of social skills that I didn't have back in the day, but this kind of people hadn't gone through anything that challenged them to be better so when they learn that there's something about you that doesn't fit their perfect definition of "cool/quirky/weird" or whatever they become mean and now they want to avoid you and exclude you.
But it doesn't stop there because that's how they deemed EVERYONE who is a little different for the way they dress, for the interests that they have, for the hobbies that they have etcetera so not only they end up making fun of and excluding actual "weird" girls (which at this point is kind of an euphemism to avoid saying "interesting girls" I think) but also have these very strict standards to be friends with them so they're now surrounded by enablers.
This ended up being a longer post than what I intended but I don't want it to sound like I'm invalidating somebody's persona, it is just a very specific way of acting towards others that comes off as not only performative but also mean? I'm kind of going in circles now but I wanted to get it off my chest and if anybody feels the same or has felt the same and wants to comment about it and also get it off their chest just let me know.