u/Systematic34

To preface I am on orilissa and still experience pain, I've had one laparoscopy already and will most likely need another soon. Long story.

I do not mean that I want to be off medication or have crazy amounts of pain, extremely heavy periods.

I DO wish I just had a normal cycle that wasn't extremely painful heavy and to be able to know how my body functions off of hormonal medication. Especially with weight gain because I've been on a steady incline that I can't seem to stop since I was 14 when I started birth control. I am now 22 and I've gained over 100 pounds since then. Also I'm on cymbalta for fibromyalgia so that doesn't help either. But I digress.

I miss having my period and having a normal hormone cycle. And some part of me deep down really wants to get off of hormonal messing meds just to see what would happen. Regardless of pain and other issues.

I (21F) stood up in my mother's and stepdad's wedding on Saturday. I don't live near my parents so I drove an hour and a half to stay at my mom's house starting Wednesday before the wedding.

Some background, my mom and I have a rough relationship. I don't like being at her house or around the family minus a few specific people. And I do have anxiety, depression, and ptsd from living there.

Wednesday was fine, I settled in, unpacked a little and my mom made lunch. My mom wanted to take my sister and I to an old school arcade (gaming cabinets, pinball machines, etc) for a mini bachelorette party. It was fun, I enjoyed myself but I still wanted to see one of my friends that night since I'm not in my hometown often. My mom said no that she wanted me home and that we have to wake up early tomorrow morning for a bunch of errands. I am aware I am an adult and could have said that I was just going to see my friend regardless of what she said but I won't lie I'm kinda terrified of the woman so I folded and stayed home.

Thursday was nails, spray tans, and errands. Nails and spray tan went well but I was exhausted afterwards since I didn't sleep well the night before. I had to take anxiety meds to sleep which is not normal for me. I ended up staying home the rest of the day thankfully and resting. I still couldn't sleep without anxiety meds that night but luckily I slept a little more.

Friday, the day before the wedding. Big set up day and rehearsal in the evening. The venue was at my stepdad's parents' house on the lake. When we arrived some of the tents had been set up and most of the tables and chairs were set up as well. My mom went to check where the wedding arch was to see if she liked it. She ended up moving it to a slightly different spot that was better for pictures and putting chairs. This decision immediately pissed off her MIL who sent her a picture of the arch earlier and my mom said she loved it but in the picture you couldn't really see where it was placed but it looked nice against the background.

My mom's mother started worrying about where chair placements were going to be with the arch and she decided that was all she was going to work on and proceeded to mess around with chairs in the backyard for 2 hours. My sister and I helped my mom set up a bunch of baskets that were holding different goodies. My sister and I were also trying to keep an eye on my mom's dogs because they're not the most well behaved unless they're given drugs.

At one point I went inside the house to get a break from the heat and my mom's MIL asked if the white lace blouse would look nice for the wedding. I told her absolutely not and she needs to wear a different color, after which she grabbed an identical blouse in red. Like wtf.. After hours of stress worrying about setting up and trying to keep peace between family members because they all have to be right despite it only being my mom's wedding we finally got to rehearse.

We got the order of walking down sorted and then we had to decide how to walk back. Keep in mind the groomsmen walked down with my stepdad and my sister and I who were bridesmaids walked my mom down the aisle. Oh and it was extremely important that my sister and I were to hug my stepdad and mom before standing behind my mom. We were yelled at to do this during the rehearsal which was unnecessary. So walking back, my mom and stepdad went and next was going to be the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Silly me I assumed that since we walked down separately we would walk back the same. Noooooo, we must pair up with a groomsman to walk back. In essence fine, but there were so many opinions flying from my mom, her mother, and the MIL, in the middle of walking back I shushed my grandmother by putting my hand in her face and closing it. I walked away while my grandmother shouted after me "Out of the will! Out of the will!" That pretty much ended the rehearsal and everyone started drinking and eating. I just wanted to leave because I was stressed from being with all these terrible people.

Saturday, the wedding day. I got my hair and makeup done that morning and it looked great I loved it. My mom loved hers but my sister HATED hers. To be fair she did look like Marie Antoinette. She went home to fix hers. Getting back to the venue was a little tricky because I hadn't driven there myself before and no one gave me the address until I started texting and calling everyone I could because instead of meeting at the hotel we were going to stay at we were going to meet at the venue and I had an address for only one of those places. It ended up working out, I got the address and it was fine. The rest of the day went smoothly and was great for the most part. The ceremony went perfectly planned and everything was great. Pictures went well, my stepdad started drinking immediately and got drunk quite quickly actually but that didn't seem to affect things too much. Food was good, we all looked great. Eventually I got tired and decided to go to the hotel. About an hour later I got a text from a family friend that was still at the wedding.

My grandmother was scolding my stepdad for not spending enough time with my mom. He was drunk so it turned into a yelling match and he started crying and went to leave but then his own parents started arguing with him and he eventually stormed off. My mom tried defending him but then everyone turned on her and she also ended up leaving in tears.

Sunday my sister and I left without a word to anyone. The most stressful week of my life.

So I finally had endo surgery 3 years ago and I got put on orilissa afterwards to maintain this and it worked great. 6 months after starting the orilissa my gyno wanted me to go back to birth control and I was really nervous but I agreed.

After about a year and a half after I started getting intense pain again. It was gradual pain built up since starting the birth control but it started to be unbearable again.

I went to a new gyno (I moved) and she wanted me to go back on orilissa and try physical therapy. I agreed at the time. The physical therapy didn't really help my endometriosis just the vulvodynia. Being back on the orilissa helped but less than I had hoped. I didn't go back to the after surgery result I had the first time.

I have a hunch that my Endo grew back when I was on birth control and now I need surgery again. Did anyone else have this happen or similar?