AITAH for not being more sympathetic to my husband during his unemployment?
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I, 36(F) have been with my husband, 49(M) for 18 years. We have 4 children, 1 from his previous marriage and 3 together. The oldest child is no longer living at home as he is 21 but our youngest 3 are still living at home.
I work 40+ hours a week but I am exclusively remote. My husband lost his job in May. While he was unemployed, my husband did nothing. I wish I could put more emphasis on the NOTHING. I remained responsible for all household "chores." (I say "chores" that way because I dont feel uts chores when I am a while adult....it's just things that need done) Groceries, sports, doctors, yardwork, appointments, school planning, shopping, cleaning.... i feel like the list goes on and on.
When i would SPECIFICALLY ask for assistance I am met with "oh, I was just about to go do ... blah blah bah" or he would commit to helping but then for some reason would not. (All those excuses were due circumstances beyond his control, of course) (<--insert heavy sarcasm voice)
Ive told him how I am extremely overwhelmed. I have broke down and cried. I have pushed myself to the point of nearly being hospitalized due to last of sleeping, eating, overall depression. I have now committed to a (temporary) medication as my nervous system is completely fried and lack up support.
He tells me I don't understand. He's just stuck. He cannot fall asleep so he plays video games. He doesnt know who he is without a job. He doesn't know what to do.
I hate the fact that I am at the point where im done with the excuses. He is choosing to do nothing. Look for another job. Go to the Dr and/or the gym if your depressed. Go mow the lawn or build a dang tree house or something. ANYTHING other than just sitting there....checking out. Mental Health is a real thing. I have done all I can. I cannot be his mother. He has to make a choice and take a step.
So, AITAH for not being more sympathetic?