u/TheLastHomeSchooler

Hey I want to take classes to become a science teacher or just scientist. But I have a bachlores in an online degree that my family knew wasn't a science I wanted to be a part of.

I was wondering how I'd go about being funded or givent a grant or whatever. Can I still go to a two or four year college? How do I even set something like this up?

Help!

But also I'm worried about becoming a teacher. I'll be witnessing so much that I spent longing for. It might be tortur to go through it for a while. Do students understand, what about other teachers? I can work, but I have a hard time making friends at any job. I can only imagine what it will be like trying to get to know students and parents.

Homeschooling is a scam on a massive level to mess with easily gullible people into a false sense of security. Often homeschooler parents are just as easy to be fooled by slime balls looking for an easy buck. I saw it with my parents and I see it now with AI generated homeschool textbooks.

Crypto currency is the number one currency of human trafficking. Criminals relied on it's success of normal people thinking it was a safe investment. Now we have leaders backing and keeping it safe to further exploit easily gullible people.

Now I want to help all the people who are stuck or feel like their stick stuck. But to write my helpful and emotional opinions or ideas just makes more data to feed some companies database. My identity is something to be packaged and stored and repeated to others (Hopefully in a nice way).

But it doesn't stop there now. I will never know if it's a human being on the other end needing my help. Even if it's not trying to get my opinions for a training set it's also trying to keep me engaged and on a platform.

You mix in bad actors of any sort and no laws in place to keep anything in check.

It break my heart and hurts my head. Why are we like this and why do we keep doing things to harm one another?

All I can do is live my life and separate myself from all those who cause harm. But it all feels like inaction and submission like the home I grew up in. And all I can do is tell others to vote and to donate. But people argue and they'll keep arguing and they'll keep telling me everything is wrong with me.

Everyone thinks I look angry. But I'm really just depressed and tired. I'm tired of seeing how things could be and how they should be. I'm tired of people like my parents who believed everything was sunshine and flowers when isolation was my constant reality and my only safe compainion.

I wish I could live like a normal person and have normal relationships. It seems only trans and gay and foreigners people are the ones to truly understand me. But everyone seems to think I don't care about them. They have no idea how much I worry for them and think about them. But to speak up gets them angry at me.

Truth is I think the smart thing is to limit all internet usage and avoid this website. But I know there are real people here needing real advice. The only best advice I could give is this.

Often the best answer to what troubles two people have between them is the answer neither wants or is happy with.

If I could begin again in my house I would have chosen to be inconvenient to my parents tell they put me in school. But that's just me looking back with my now mature adult perspective. The most hurting fact I have to admit is that my parents would have been happy to kick me around tell I agreed to stay homeschooled. I'm afraid of how many children deal with that now.

I hope that god has mercy on the brain dead people enabling other brain dead people.

I don't know if I should ever return to this website anymore. It's getting toxic and it's more then just people now being toxic. That's the part that disgusts me the most.

I hope for you all! You all keep me going and keep me nice! When I have to deal with angry coworkers I never yell back. But I also don't take their sh!t. No one knows me and I don't really know myself. But I guess some small part of me is still strong enough to stand up when the time is right. That's just being strategic. But I just get called manipulative. Truly I can never feel balanced.

Good luck out there to you all

You could read it anywhere. But FOG is something that effects you when your in a bad relationship. Because Fear or an idea of Obligation or Guilt are clouding your judgment. It's these three things that are effecting you the most in making your own decisions. The people putting you there are fine with whatever horrible thing your stuck with.

So go read about fear, obligation, and guilt. There are better writers out there. But this is an important compass for navigating relationships.

I've been thinking about writing about my homeschool experience growing up at a young at tell I turned twenty. Unfortunately it seems my life is kind of a wasteland of almost nothing that resembles other peoples lives or experiences. Since I'm a creative artist I'm kind of thinking of telling the story from inside my own mind. I can't really imagine it any other way. But like I said before it's almost like there's nothing that was really fills pages and it'd maybe be a bit short.

So, I was thinking of maybe putting something from you all into it. In a way. I think our stories and experiences need to be shown in a graphic novel type setting. But the problem is that I'd need to probably contact people and try to get a hold of them.

But one of those stories that hit me was of someone who had graduated homeschooling and their mom gave them ice cream and paper. They then got to talk to some of their public school friends about their HS graduation and the graduation party afterwards.

I'm thinking it's a story bigger then myself. Even if I didn't get the most worst off homeschooling experience. My life has been a messy thing and I still manage. But I thought I'd ask and hear what others have to say. This place has had a big effect on me.

It's just a thought I'm having. If I'm gonna trying and be the adult I know i can be. Then it's time I make some adult level decisions for myself. I have a million aides and a million skills. But I only have somuch time in my day anymore and I don't want to spend it like I've always done.

I know that people around me all connect through their entertainment and television shows. But that's how I grew up. I know people won't like me a lot for being different and making it harder to connect with me. But television and movies and games and anime kind of make me want to throw up anymore. I can't really explain it and it's hard for others to understand me.

So for now I'm gonna focus on my needs and my wants and maybe even reach my expectations for once. But I'm gonna have to cut back on things.

My list of things I'm sacrificing are.

1. Staying up late.

2. Exercise gaming and screen time.

3. Wasting time on bad relationships.

4. Eating expensive foods and habits.

I'll add more when I think of them. But these seem like a good start at least. The no staying up late is gonna hurt a lot.

What's normal? It's such a foreign word to me and it's always been the thing I hope to strive for. But I'm nothing like the people around me. But something like a whisper tells me it's also a geography one. For some reason I just can't make sense of everyone around me. At one point I thought they knew what they were doing. But it all just turned out they were really confident and that was all it was.

I feel like I'm falling. But I don't care about the approaching ground. I'm just happy to be in the sky and knowing my direction. But I'm not scared to feel this weightless. Sometimes you pass through a cloud and it feels like taking a shower.

I don't mean to frighten anyone, I've always had a small sense of myself all my life. I always assumed I didn't know anything and thought most of my life I was stupid. Like criminally. But the past few years seem to be giving me some sort of sign. I can't really tell what it means. Just that I'm unlike everyone else. But I'm still broken and I'm always going to be beautifully broken as a person.

I get these thoughts these ideas. What I have leaves me a confusing mess and familial scars still ring so deep. I feel hollow. All I can do is maintenance. That's all I can really seem to do for the condition I've been left in cause of my upbringing. I still have my soul, I still have my soul.

Lately the things that have been helping me are reading, writing, and sleeping and walking in the morning. It's good to take the world in first thing in the morning. I huge a tree in my yard and tell it good morning.

I'm gonna start trying to do some studying for something. I'm not sure yet and I have no other sense of direction. But it's good, I'm good.

So I'm gonna start doing these things for my mental health.

1. Bed as soon as I can usually around 10.
2. Wake up and walk for a little.
3. Read, study, or something for a few hours. I got my Coursera Classes for now.
4. Stretch and stuff before bed.