u/The_Turtle-Moves — reddlx

Their favourite fork

When they moved out, and I eventually learned where to, I made sure my ADHD and possibly autistic 15yo had their Favourite Fork at their father's. He had not bothered making sure they had it.

I didn't then know I might not have them stay with me again. It was still "I want to stay with dad for now until I know how I want to split my time" and not yet "If you don't give dad full legal parental rights and full custody, I don't want any contact"

Sometimes, the brain goblins are very strong, and the doubt settles in "Was it something I did?" "Maybe I really am the problem?"

I look then, to this framed fork, identical to the one I brought to them, and I am reminded a person, who in their darkest hour, when their life has been ripped out from under them, when their heart is in a million pieces, makes sure the child has their Favorite Fork, is not the problem, the abuser, the narcissist.

One day, we'll take it down, and they'll use it. Here.

With me.

u/The_Turtle-Moves — 3 days ago

▲ 16 r/ParentalAlienation

I just need to say this to people who will understand

I miss them so much it hurts. How did it end up like this? How can he be allowed to do this? What did I do wrong? I had two teenagers who said "I love you mum" and hugged me spontaneously. I was the default parent. Now I haven't seen or heard from the two oldest since mid December. In two days it's our constitution day, and my facebook will bring me memories from earlier years with them in their finest clothes, celebrations, happy times and I just want to dig myself down somewhere. But I can't, the youngest is here with me this week, he's been so far unsuccessful in alienating her, but I fear the three weeks she will spend with him this summer. Will I get her back? Why does grieving this loss feel like giving up?

What did I do to deserve this.

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u/The_Turtle-Moves — 7 days ago

▲ 25 r/WitchesVsPatriarchy

Some context: I have an ex-husband who, though not diagnosed cuz that would require him accepting he might have a problem, I strongly suspect is a narcissist. We had an open marriage/poly towards the end, but my ex did not expect my relationship with my boyfriend would last. My boyfriend and my ex have known each other for well over 20 years, and my boyfriend considered my ex to be one of his closest friends.

Now that the veil has been lifted, and we see my ex for what he is, manipulative, false, abusive and entitled, my boyfriend is naturally grieving the illusion of the friend he thought he had.

He, my boyfriend, has been almost constantly ill the last 6 months or so. He is exhausted, frequent infections, feeling down, and I'm starting to think he's been hexed

I should probably add my ex is an energy worker. I know karma is gonna get him for how he uses his powers, but in the meantime, is there a ritual my boyfriend can do to rid himself of the bad influences? I have little experience in rituals, I've been going with intuition.... Also, it doesn't feel like I should do any rituals on my boyfriend's behalf, I'm too invested in both parts of the ritual.

Me and my ex have children together, and he has two of them under his cohersive control, so there are some ties I can't cut

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u/The_Turtle-Moves — 18 days ago