Idk if I’m exaggerating these events in my mind
I have not went home in a year and half. I’m in my 30’s and typically would visit my home state 2 - 3 times a year. My dad and step mom are taking it extremely personal. And I understand why they are offended especially my step mom. But as I’ve been in a new space I’ve been thinking about a few things that just bothered me and I’m not sure if they’re big deal or not. I also wonder if I’m just so comfortable in my new life that I’m making these things a bigger deal. Idk. (the new space I’m talking about is healthy/stable period in my life as well as a healthy relationship)
Ok so two things. One - when I just moved in with my dad and my stepmom full time around 14 years old, my dad took me to the doctor. The doctor had me lift my shirt up and bend over and touch my toes. She thought I might have scoliosis. This happened one time at the doctor and never again. After that all the way to my senior year of highschool, late at night typically when my step mom was in the shower my dad would have me come perform the same action. There were times when I would not have a bra on and I would try to cover myself and my dad would say I’m your dad you don’t need to cover yourself. Idk now that I’m older the whole ordeal seems WEIRD! And to be honest I feel like he was self pleasing while I would do this but of course I can’t be sure.
- One night when I was about 16 I was asleep in my bed. I was either naked or just had a shirt on. Anyways he was drunk when he came home. My step mom went to their room and passed out. He came into my room and was intensely trying to cuddle me and kept saying he missed when I was little girl. I kept forcing him away from me and explaining that I didn’t have proper clothing on. Also we never cuddled so this was just weird. The next day I was at work at he called my work phone made sure I was alone and then apologized, asked if I remembered anything like that happening before - I said no because I really didn’t. And then asked me to not tell my step mom because she would not understand.
Just all weird things where I wasn’t really hurt but still just gross ugh. I never told anybody this stuff and wouldn’t ever feel comfortable enough to confront him about this stuff. I just don’t know am I using these incidents as a justification for not visiting home? I won’t tell anybody this happened because I don’t want to ruin anybody’s image