Visitors in the first few weeks - disagreements with partner
My partner and I are expecting twins this fall. His mom and my parents are planning to stay with us to help.
I want to be extra cautious about illness during those first few weeks. I’ve told family and friend especially those who would have to fly or take a bus to see us that we’d rather they wait until later to visit.
Recently, one of my partner’s friends mentioned she’d be in our city on vacation and wanted to stop by. I said I was okay with her briefly visiting if she wore a mask and stayed away from the babies, which upset my partner. He eventually agreed to that, but then said he wanted to go out to lunch or dinner with her afterward. I told him that felt contradictory to our goal of minimizing exposure, especially since she’d just traveled internationally.
He said we can’t live in a bubble. He called me “extreme,” said I have an overly negative view of illness and the world, and argued that life is full of risk.
I see this as a temporary precaution during a unique period when our newborns are especially vulnerable, not a permanent lifestyle. He says if he got sick while out with her that he’d just stay away from the babies, but I don’t understand why we’d voluntarily increase the risk in the first place.
Am I being overly cautious, or is it reasonable to avoid optional social gatherings with recently traveled friends during the first few weeks with newborns?