r/newborns

I honestly feel like there is no solution to this problem but I will post here in case there's something I'm totally missing here.

I have a 4 month old baby girl and I work from home. My job requires me to be on the phone for 100% of my shift. They're very flexible with what hours I can work, but I have to get 40 hours every week no matter what. Using pto isn't an option. I work in telesales, so the best time to work really is Monday through Friday in the morning and then in the evening. If I work other hours, I risk losing money.

My husband works the same hours I do and has 0 flexibility with his job.

Currently I have absolutely no one who can watch my daughter during the daytime, and I'm limited to what I can afford when it comes to hiring a babysitter. I have a posting on care.com for $16/hr for 20 hours a week, which I realize is not much, but we live in rural AL and most jobs around here pay $15 max. I'm not getting any replies there, which is not surprising considering where I live and what I'm able to afford.

I'd be willing to put my daughter in daycare, except she refuses to take a bottle. I have tried about 7 different brands, 0-3 nipple sizes, heating the nipple, warm milk, cold milk, lukewarm milk, leaving the room, leaving the house, absolutely nothing gets this girl to take a bottle.

I don't have any social media, so posting on Facebook is not an option either. I don't know where else to look for local groups.

Does anyone have any advice or suggestions?

My baby girl is 8 weeks old tomorrow and so far I’ve only had her in sleepers. For some reason I feel a little guilty that I’m not dressing her up all cute with bows, etc. She gets fussy when I’m changing her so I haven’t felt ready to put her in anything more complex but at the same time she’s been wearing the same clothes in all her pics and part of me feels bad about that.

Are you dressing your newborns in cute outfits yet?

Second time mom here, but it’s been 4.5 years since I had a newborn. How many doctor’s appointments is your newborn having? We had one 3 days after birth, a two week appointment, & then they didn’t schedule me again until the end of October when baby is 3 months. They told me they were just so booked up, but I thought there was at least a 1 month and 2 month checkup, or am I nuts??

First time parents here looking for parents’ experiences and perspectives, including whether our approach sounds reasonable or overly cautious.

Our baby is 6 days old and has spent 5 days of those in hospital being treated for an infection. He has been through a lot already including two unsuccessful lumbar punctures. Mum also developed an infection after a difficult labour journey and has been recovering while also focusing on the baby.

We’re now finally at home and settling in our new home routine with a newborn.

Given what he’s experienced as a new baby, we really wanted to avoid (if we can) further illness or complications so want to take precautions where we can whilst he’s still so little.

We have also said that close family are very welcome to come and meet/see the baby, but for now we’re asking people not to hold him, kiss him or visit when poorly. This isn’t meant to be a long term rule, it’s more about giving him and mum time to recover, and giving us space to adjust after a very difficult first week.

However, my partner’s family feels we’re being overly restrictive as they really want to hold the baby. They’ve also questioned whose idea this boundary was, when this is something we’ve discussed and agreed on together as parents.

We understand that all our family members are excited, they absolutely adore him and holding a baby is a natural feeling you’d want to do, but given our recent experience it’s understandable we’re being more cautious.

So, I’m genuinely interested in hearing both sides. What do you think and what would you do in this situation?

My LO is 12 weeks old, but won’t technically be “3 months” until Sept 2 which is still 2 weeks away. I know at a certain point we just jump to months only and I’m sure it’ll come naturally but when did all of you stop counting weeks?

Had an angel baby up until his 2-month vaccines. Ever since then, he’s been so fussy—stomach pains, irregular stools, multiple nursing strikes, and crying what feels like most of the day. His stool still hasn’t returned to what it was before the vaccines (thankfully, no blood). Our saving grace is that he still sleeps pretty well at night (usually a 5–7 hour first stretch, then waking every 2–3 hours).

He’s 11 weeks old now, and for the last two days he has absolutely refused to breastfeed. He’ll take a bottle, but even that is a fight. We’ve only given him about 1 bottle/day since 4 weeks old, using a slow-flow, breastfeeding-friendly nipple and paced feeding, so I don’t think this is bottle preference. It seems like he’s in pain when trying to breastfeed because he immediately arches his back and cries when I bring him into position, regardless of the hold. I’m terrified I’m going to lose my supply.

He also hasn’t latched without a nipple shield since a few days after birth. We’ve continued trying positive nipple exposure and were really hoping to wean off it by now. Our LC keeps saying there’s no rush, which I know, but now that he won’t nurse at all, it feels so much more stressful.

He’s been incredibly colicky these last couple of days. No fever, constantly giving gas drops, and today I tried gripe water because I’m desperate for something to help. I can’t help but wonder if the rotavirus vaccine somehow messed up his gut. Every time we think we’re finally doing better, we take two steps backward. The pediatrician's office says everything sounds normal and not to worry unless he starts vomiting, but it’s so hard to watch him be miserable.

My partner is back at work and worked 14 hours yesterday and then another 8 hours today. I’m completely exhausted and defeated. I’ve had to put him safely in his crib and walk away for a few minutes multiple times because I just needed to breathe.

I know this won’t last forever, but right now it honestly feels like it never ends.

Has anyone else experienced something similar around 2–3 months, especially after the rotavirus vaccine? Did the nursing strikes eventually resolve? And how did you protect your supply? I know I need to pump, but it’s so hard to remember when you’re spending all day trying to get your baby to stop crying and still hoping they’ll breastfeed at the next feed.

Omg.. I don’t even know what to say. I wish I was lucky enough to have a unicorn 🦄 baby, but good golly Molly this 4 week fussiness is no joke. I know baby is truly waking up to the world. The overstimulation and gas has wrapped up, but jeez I’m so tired. Babe won’t sleep for longer than 30 minutes at a time. I keep reminding myself that this stage won’t last long, better days are coming, sleep filled nights are coming but sh** this is hard.

What on earth is week 6 and 7 doing, previously our baby was able to do longer first stretches and then the next few stretches would be around 2-3hours, now the first stretch is lucky to be 2 hours and then all sleeps after that we get maximum 45 minutes before waking and from like 2am onwards contact sleeping is the only way, is this just because of the week 6-8 changes that occur? Does it get better, because we are so severely sleep deprived 😅😅

Hi! I feel like I’d more than content with only 1 child.
My baby is 6 months now and my absolute life and I can’t image having to split my attention from him.
The reason like most that I think about having more than one child is because I would love for him to have a sibling and have somebody there for the day that I’m not here. I have two older sisters that I have no relationship relationships with. So that’s not even a reliable idea to just have it for that reason cause there’s no guarantees.

For those of you who only had one child, how did it go for you? Is there a part of you that still wanted another child? Is there a part of you that regretted having only one child? Or are you so damn glad you had one child? Would love to hear your experiences with us, please :) thank you!

Is it crazy to be the only one putting my 7 month old baby to sleep since he was born?? On one hand I’m yearning for a bit of freedom but on the other I am finding it hard and complicated to let go. Important to note I am breastfeeding exclusively. But have the ability to pump but barely do

I am 10 weeks pp, I am chronically online so expected the worst, the horrible, the ugly and had a much better experience than I expected. It was and is difficult but it has gotten easier as time has gone on.

A life hack I found early on was using my coffee flask instead of a mug to make my morning coffee. It means I have hot coffee all morning and if I get nap trapped it will still be hot whenever he wakes up.

So what are your life hacks for postpartum life to share with others?

For a few weeks now, I’ve been setting alarms over night every 4 hours to wake baby for a diaper change and feed.

Recently I’ve noticed every time during the night now I’m having to wake baby up (previously sometimes she would wake up before the alarm).

Every parent I’ve spoken to has said don’t wake a sleeping baby and that they would let the baby wake me up when she’s hungry.

Last night, I decided to not set any alarms and let her wake me up. Her last feed was 9:30pm and she woke up around 6. My app said it had been almost 9 hours since her last feed.

I’m concerned about this because what if I just didn’t hear her fuss? Is this safe for her to go that long without eating? My mind can’t help but go to the risk of SIDS.

Her 2 month visit they said she was gaining weight well (but we were still doing middle of night scheduled wakes). I mentioned to her PA that I feel that I’m having to wake her up for feeds at night and he didn’t really say much if I had to keep going that.

Has anyone experienced this? I was prepared for lack of sleep but now I feel like I’m waking every few hours to make sure she’s okay. I’m just anxious.

I don't understand why babies get so upset when you change their diaper. I'm the one wiping their butt, and they're the ones getting angry?! 😅

FTM here! My baby is 7 weeks old, and last few days have been absolutely horrible. My husband and I take shifts, but during our night shifts she’s screaming so the other person doesn’t get any sleep because our anxiety and even with ear plugs. I’ve been trying everything to bouncing on ball, carrier, tracking feeding to make sure by bedtime it hits a certain average for higher probability to fall asleep, different sleep sacs, rocking, bouncing, pacifier, heating pad trick, music, and even letting her hear the shower run which makes her stop crying but then cries as soon as the shower stops. I feel so guilty for wishing this time goes faster. I’m exhausted to the point where I am having break downs and did have my apt with GYN to discuss ppd. Really needing encouragement, I’m trying SO hard. When doesn’t get better??

I have extreme rage right now.

It’s the third night on the trot I’ve had no sleep with my 6 week old colicky baby. Partner went back to work last week, works in a small office.

He has been getting 6-7 hours straight of sleep, will be snoring next to me, if he does get disturbed he goes straight back to sleep. Yet coming home and complaining how tired he is.

I snapped and said it’s irritating to hear when I feel like I have the flu I’m so sleep deprived. He then said it’s not a competition and he’s tired too.

It’s currently 4am, and I forced him awake because I couldn’t cope with the screaming and being so tired. His solution was to put the baby in between us in bed to calm him down.

I’m just infuriated. I’m covered in sweat and breast milk. I have heat rash all over my neck and chest from baby sleeping on me in the heat. My back is in pain still from my epidural. My boobs are leaking all over the bed because I’ve run out of breast pads. But he’s tired too.

I’m a 36F married to 40M for two years, together 7 total.

I previously posted when I was about 8 weeks postpartum about arguments with my husband over sex. He was dissatisfied with lack of sex after baby and made comments about not being turned on by me in sweats. I’m now almost seven months postpartum, and it continues to be an issue. I work full time and I’m actually the breadwinner in the family. We manage to have sex about twice a week but he’s often complaining about lack of sex or saying our sex life is a joke or he’s bored. I’ve tried dressing up, getting new outfits, being spontaneous….its never enough. Is this normal? I’m trying really hard to empathize with him adjusting to having a new baby but it seems excessive. It’s to the point he’s nasty and cold over his perceived lack of sex.

TLDR: husband has been angry about sex postpartum to the point of being nasty. What do I do?

I soaked it in with my first. I couldn’t understand people who hated the newborn bubble! Turns out he was just an easy baby. And people with easy babies could not be having a more different postpartum/newborn experience.

Every day over the past couple of weeks with my second (5 weeks tomorrow) has been harder than the hardest day with my first.

This one will stay awake for hours. He clearly gets overtired but nothing we do gets him to nap. Eventually he just passes out after fighting us and crying/fussing for hours. He won’t really take a pacifier. He hates babywearing. If he is not asleep or eating, he is probably fussing. I guess the good thing is that he’s hungry all the time, so he’s eating a lot. It goes without saying that I have to hold him for all naps (if he naps), but I was prepared for that.

The assumption is always that it is reflux but I really don’t think it is. He doesn’t really have any of the signs. I actually think he just hates being a baby.

With my first, I was all 🥰soak it in 🥰 we’re gonna look back and miss this 🥰 (when the hardest part of his newborn phase was that he needed to be held for naps like 90% of newborns) but I can guarantee I will not miss this phase with this one. It honestly makes me feel sad and guilty that I am just trying to survive each day and make it through after looking back fondly on the phase with my first. This is just tough.

I have a 3month old. Question, what does everyone do to protect not getting pregnant after having a baby? Birth control? Tracking cycle? I have an irregular cycle so idk how that would work even if I track it, I am scared I will still get pregnant. If you track your cycle how do you make sure you don’t have a scare?

Baby girl will be 3months this Saturday. She does good with tummy time on a Bobbie pillow but when we do tummy time on the ground she is terrible. She can semi get her head up but not much (on the ground). Is this bad for a 3month old? I feel terrible when I see all of these other babies who can do this already. She also isn’t grabbing anything yet like toys. I am trying to not worry but it’s hard not too.

Hello there FTD here

First day we brought our son home fuckkkkk it sucked, we were beyond exhausted, and we were wondering how the fuck we were gonna manage this lack of sleep

During the next day we were watching instagram reels while he was sleeping on us and saw someone say this

This is what we do every night when we sleep and we get sleep till about 1 am then he wakes up to feed, then same at 330, then same about 530, and same at 730 or 8 and then I get up for the day while I let my wife sleep for another few hours

Our son is just about 3 weeks old, we get 2-3 hrs every night in bassinet then have to wake up cuz he cries and we feed him and put him back in and he’s asleep

What we do is use a heating pad, it has 3 levels I put it on level 2, and use my JBL speaker in the bassinet at the back and use my phone to Bluetooth white noise

We also ALWAYS put him to bed at 10 pm no matter what even if he doesn’t have any circadian rhythm

When he’s asleep on my wife’s arms
I take him, take the heating pad out but the mattress is still very warm like we’re holding him, put him down, hold him and just say shhh for about 15 seconds and then hes out for about 2-3 hrs

Hopefully this helps some of yall

Cheers to happy healthy babies❤️❤️