u/Tim_Tam_Tommyn

Hello. A horse at the barn when I work has midline dermatitis. I doubt it's noseeum allergy since he did not react this way in summer before 2-3 years ago, and he is now 7. So I've deduced it was caused by threadworms. I know mature threadworms can't be eliminated, but on top of ultra frequent deworming to get rid of the larvae and at least stop the cycle so he may feel better 10-20 years from now (crying? No I'm not crying), what can be done? Isn't there like, some kinda holistic deworming methid that can be used on top? Or some plant that hasn't been studied enough yet tonprove it works, but annecdotaly, it sorta works? He has been given a steroid treatment in the past, I think. I can't remember the name but it was bright blue. Then a second one, white. And another blue one, but this time it didn't stain his tongue. Our vet is out of ideas now.

And what topic ointment do you like best? He scratches himself raw, he spends all summer with open wounds on his face and belly, and rubs out his entire mane and the top of his tail, to the point there's only a layer of crust left. . As for ointments, we have used sudocreme (the white one with lots of zinc that's good for diaper chaffing in babies), green clay, nitrofurazone, something with lots of aloevera... applying green clay 2x a day has helped the most I think, since the barrier it created lasted until the next application, but it's annoying to work with and did not actualy help with healing, it just prevented a bit of damage. But if there's any hay on the ground he'll rub it off on it immediatly! I don't think it actually offers much relief. So if anyone has another suggestion that may work as well or better and be easier to apply...

Hi everyone!

I'd definitly appreciate advice or even encouragement or smt, but this is also half just venting.

It all started yesterday. I was feeling very relapse-y but more in a "ah I wish I got worse so people would see how much I' struggling" way then actualy needing to cope. And since I've been trying to replace sh with different, not much healthier coping mechanisms, ie drinking, nicotine pouches or smoking, that's what I did. And generaly I have a rule, of max 1 consomation per day, and to alternate between the tree, and to let one full week go between each consomation of either substance. But for some reason I've not yet caught, yesterday I forgot that rule and smoked, then drank 2 hrs later, which at least ig they're spaced out, but half my family are alcoholic and half smoke, so I'm usualy somewhat careful. And then that night, I still ended up relapsing, except I was at it for 1hr straight. I am CHOPPED. This morning their was a bug in my bus system mobile app and I didn't get notified of a change in my bus' parcour, it did not stop near my house, I waited 30 minutes in the pouring rain. Ended up getting on an hour late, soaked through my wind breaker/semi permeable vest, late to a gym class I didn't want to go to anyways, but had to go to or else the teacher would fail me because she set the max absences at TWO classes. Even more frustrated knowing I had all along planned to not go because it was team work scheduled, but the week just before that I realised I had forgotten my gym pants, thus did not participate in the end, since I'd've an absence anyway for not proper equipment. During gym class, peak dysphoria. We had to do jumpy exercises and it's technicaly a dance room, meaning mirrors on every wall and no choice but to look at my bouncing chest, blink back tears and pray nobody notices either. Then, spent the whole day feeling super anxious for wtv reason?? No specific anxious thoughs, just... you know the knot forming in your stomach when you feel guilty and you wish the person you wronged would murder you so you'd be quit? Or more like a sphere of emptyness taking up place actualy. All. Day. I want to go at it again so bad. But I don't have any supplies left to bandage with in case I go too deep. Used it all up this morning making sure nothing reopened and bled through during pe. This sucksssssss

And now that I've written it out and tought about it, I've been feeling this knot for a few days already now. I tried to shower without my phone to keep me too busy to notice I'm showering, for the first time in idk how long, thinking I could just focus on the warm water instead and I'd be fine. I was not, in fact, fine. I hate this I hate it. Also I think I'm actualy feeling fearful, not anxious. But not fear in the heart that's like, oh watching a horror movie or riding a roller coaster. Fear in the stomach that's like, going home after school knowing your parent is back from work and they texted you a picture of things they found in your wardrobe they disagree with. And knowing they're about to give you the worst most deafening yelling sesh of your life, make 10 different, unrelated and not interconnected treaths, and in the process make sure to humiliate you in front of all your siblings, who'll then be mad at you for making said parent mad because now they need to stay in their room and not make a sound or else they'll also get yelled at and it's not fair to them. And now a new knot forms in your stomach because you feel guilty for ruining their day one more time.