I DID IT
I dont have many people i can tell irl about this but i just had penetrative sex for the first time and im so overwhelmed with how proud i am of myself and i just never thought it would happen after 8 years of slow progress, and even more years of being undiagnosed and just feeling broken
I dont even know how it happened, im nowhere near a large dilation size, but i have a new sexual partner and idk my body just felt so safe and relaxed with him... we had both agreed to wait for a few months for me to get regularly dilating again after falling off the bandwagon the past year, but when we were doing other stuff last night we both just wanted to give it a try and after a bit of warming up it went in!!
It feels like such a shallow thing but im just so happy with myself and it felt so validating that i could do it