u/Top-Platypus-8798

I get catcalled on the street or approached by men if I’m not with my boyfriend. It’s usually young men in flashy cars catcalling me and older/creepy men approaching me. Older women will often make comments about me being slim or young, they often say comparative things like ‘I was so skinny when I was young’. When I used dating apps I got a lot of attention, a lot of it was very sexual and forward. When I was in school girls made rumours about me being promiscuous and boys would lie about sleeping with me, girls would be possessive of me as a friend or possessive of their other friends/boyfriends around me. If I posted a selfie I would get a lot of likes, girls I didn’t actually know from school would comment that I was pretty, I wasn’t popular but the popular girls would comment too. I could never seem to fly under the radar, if I hung out alone boys called me a ‘boner loner’. On my first day of school, everyone’s first day so not many people knew each-other, I tried to sit with a girl that was considered unpopular and she just looked at me confused and asked ‘why are you sitting with me’. In nightclubs I have had men approach me and kiss me without any signal of consent. I went on a date with a man once and we kissed, I turned him down to go further and he started begging me for sex.

Boys I was involved with when I was younger didn’t want anything serious, it was all sexual and often they’d leave after if I did have sex with them. A lot of my boyfriends were quite unattractive. In school my friends called me ‘cake face’, we all wore the same amount of makeup but I got the most attention for it. People think I’m wearing more makeup than I am, people assume I’ve had cosmetic work, and the local lip filler lady would comment on my instagram posts as some sort of self promotion. At work male bosses are kinder, I’ve been hired without having to go through any employment checks. My friend recommended me for a job and the female bosses was rude to me and then after she was rude about me to my friend and said I was under qualified, my friend said that they hired people less qualified all the time and the boss doesn’t get on well with women. I worked with a woman in a senior position who started to wear the same clothes as me, always polite but very distant, felt like she set me up to fail with random things, then I heard she was spreading really nasty outrageous rumours about me. I applied for a promotion and they couldn’t fault anything about my application but I didn’t get the job, the only feedback being ‘I was too young’. I had another coworker who was young and pretty who said that I got treated badly there because I was young and pretty.

I dont understand what this is and why it happens to me, is it because I’m pretty or something else.