At what point would you cut this friend off
I met her through a mental health support group. I used chatGPT tp rephrase it.
On one occasion, I mentioned to the people in that group that I wanted to visit Coney Island, and she said she was open to going as well. That was when she started texting me.
At the beginning of our texting exchanges, she kept asking me about my relationship with my brother. Her own relationship with her brother was strained, so I think she was trying to relate. I already gave her an answer, but she continued bringing it up every few days.
She used to live in Lakeside and enjoyed going to Jurong Lake Gardens, so we just went there to cycle the first time we met up. During these outings, she would talk a lot about her primary school life and her brother. She tended to talk about herself constantly and rarely asked anything about me.
We went to KidsAmaze together once. Technically, entry is restricted to those under 13, but she told me we could still beg the staff to let us in. After that first visit, she asked me to go again, but I told her I was scared of heights. She kept insisting that I should still go with her.
Then one morning, she suddenly texted to ask if I wanted to hang out, and I said yes. She suggested we go to the Science Centre, and I agreed. She started rushing me to hurry up, and she sounded quite frustrated that I was moving too slowly. She even suggested that I skip buying breakfast and just meet her immediately. Only after that did she tell me that she had already bought tickets for a science show—something I had previously told her I didn't want to watch. The show cost money, so she essentially made me pay for something I wasn't interested in.
We wanted to watch the Northern Lights at Gardens by the Bay, but she started suggesting we go cycling first. We initially agreed to go on the weekend, but she then asked if we could go to the Science Centre instead and postpone the Northern Lights. When I told her I'd prefer to see the Northern Lights first, she said it would be more fun if another girl from the mental health support group joined us, and she started insisting that we wait until that girl was free. She then continued saying we should go to the Science Centre that weekend.
On another occasion, we had planned to hang out, but I suddenly cancelled in the morning—we were supposed to meet in the afternoon. The reason was that I had gone out with my colleague until very late the previous night, and I also had something on that morning before meeting her. She asked me to cancel my morning commitment and just meet her in the afternoon, saying it was bad for me to cancel plans at the last minute.
She suggested going to the Science Centre again, and I said I didn't want to because I felt it was more for kids. I even mentioned that my colleague had said the same thing. She told me I shouldn't listen to my colleague. A few weeks later, she asked me to go to the Science Centre with her once more, and I again said I didn't want to. She started pressing me for reasons and said I should be interested because it's related to IT—even though it's not really related. I suggested she ask other people from the mental health support group to go with her, and she replied with something like, "That's because you don't want to go with me?" I told her I simply wasn't interested. She asked which part I wasn't interested in, and I didn't reply after that.
A few weeks later, I brought up the Northern Lights again, and she said we could go that Saturday. But soon after, she asked if we could watch a movie or cycle around Jurong Lake Gardens instead, and postpone the Northern Lights to the following week. I told her I thought we should see the Northern Lights first, and she agreed. We planned to meet on Saturday, but after I arrived and texted her that I was there, she suddenly replied that she wasn't coming anymore because she wanted to go to Jurong Point with her parents, saying she hadn't spent time with them in a while. So we postponed it to Sunday.
On Sunday, she wanted to cycle around Gardens by the Bay before seeing the Northern Lights, so we did that. Afterward, she asked if I still wanted to see the Northern Lights, saying she felt like going home. I told her I still wanted to go. When we got to the venue, she said she was hungry and asked me to accompany her to buy food—even though the Northern Lights had already started. After a while, I told her I wanted to go see the lights, and she finally went with me.
Later, we planned to meet up again, and I asked if we could cycle at Coney Island—since I'd wanted to go since the start of the year but kept delaying it. She started saying she'd rather cycle at Jurong Lake Gardens instead. She also asked if I could go to KidsAmaze with her again, even though I'd already told her multiple times that I was scared of the high elements there.
I kept telling her I didn't want to go to the Science Centre. On one occasion, I sent her a volunteering opportunity at the Science Centre, and she responded by asking if I could volunteer there with her.
After that, I got frustrated and blocked her. I unblocked her after a while, and she texted to ask why I was angry with her. I tried to explain that I didn't appreciate her constantly pushing me to go places I didn't want to go, and that whenever I wanted to visit somewhere, she would delay it and suggest her own preferred places instead. I don't think she really understood what I was saying. She asked if I was angry because she cancelled plans last minute, and then said she was also angry that I had cancelled last minute before. I told her that wasn't the issue—it was about her continually pushing me toward places I wasn't interested in, while delaying the places I wanted to go. After that, we just stopped texting each other.
We accidentally ran into each other in January 2025. She looked shocked to see me, apologized for what had happened between us before, and offered me a spare ticket to a Mayday concert—she made it clear I wouldn't have to pay. But during the concert, she walked ahead on her own, moving very fast and expecting me to chase after her. She also wanted to leave halfway through, but I didn't feel like leaving. She started speaking loudly, saying there was still school the next day. The concert was at Stadium MRT, yet she wanted me to travel all the way to Lakeside MRT just to pick her up and then turn back to Stadium.
Shortly after, she told me she didn't have her class timetable. Every day, she'd ask me to take a photo of mine and send it to her—which I found odd because we weren't even in the same classes.
We stopped talking for a while. Then one time, another girl from the mental health support group and I decided to meet up with her just for fun. We noticed she seemed better—she was actually asking about us instead of always talking about herself like before.
December last year, we started hanging out again. We went to USS and played badminton at the void deck downstairs from my house. At one point, I went home to grab something, and she followed me right up to my front door—which made me uncomfortable because my mum was sitting in the living room and didn't know my friend was standing right outside and normally my friend will just wait for me downstairs if i want to go home to take something
Another time, when I showed her a photo on my phone, she took it and scrolled through my entire gallery without asking and even look at my entire whatsapp convo with another person also. Whenever I'm using my phone next to her, she'll ask to see what I'm looking at and look at my phone
Then we video call and she notice i was looking at something on my laptop and she keep asking me to show her what am i looking at when i don't really want to
This year, she's been asking to hang out, but she always wants to meet at Lakeside. She used to stay at lakeside but now she move to bukit batok. She keeps asking me to visit her old block, and she'll walk up to her old unit and just stand there to talk. Then we will always play badminton at lakeside and got one time i ask if can play at my house downstairs and she say she dw
But i wanted to go pulau ubin and she didn't go with me until recently i tell her about it and she finally got go with me
Now she still constantly talks about her primary school life and her older brother, and how she drifted away from all her friends
She even asked me to bring my primary school report book to show her, and said she'd show me hers and her brother's in return. She also bring her baby photo album around to show me.
She teaches part-time tuition, and she knows her student often goes to the community club to study. She keeps asking me to go to the CC with her so she can try to see her student. Another of her student will go to the playground to play. One time, we are at Bukit Batok and she suddenly insisted we go all the way back to the playground at Lakeside to look for her student because she knew they'd be there. I felt like her student must have been uncomfortable having their tutor randomly show up at the playground. I remember her parents started looking at me with that look when they saw me and her at the playground.
Nowadays, she also keeps talking about how much she misses Lakeside Primary School and her old house, and how affected she feels that she's no longer close with her brother. She also mentioned her mum's friend son who used to live near her and moved to New Zealand—they recently returned to Singapore, and she keeps talking about how much she misses them.
That said, she has told me that if I'm ever uncomfortable with anything, I can tell her and i feel like she is better. Still, I find her very annoying, and she seems stuck in her childhood.
She even cried and video-called me once, saying it was because she started thinking about her childhood and how everything has changed. But sometimes she straight away video call me without asking or she ask if can video call then i never reply then she just straight away call
she constantly texts me to the point where it gets irritating. She also mentioned that all her other friends have ghosted her. I feel very annoyed when she keep talking about her primary school and her mum's friend son
She asks questions like whether I went to student care in primary school, and what my PSLE score was. My other friends won't ask all these. She keeps talking about drifting apart from her primary school friends. She also keeps asking me to eat Pizza Hut with her.
My friend suggested she might have some trauma related to her primary school years and might be stuck in the past.