Why would a 2w3 ESFJ respond this way?
Why would a 30-year-old female 2w3 ESFJ respond in this manner? I have an ex-situationship with a 2w3 ESFJ. We ended our relationship about nine months ago after an argument. She lied to me about something, which deeply hurt my feelings, so I ended our relationship initially. However, the next day, I realized I had made a mistake and tried to reconnect. Unfortunately, she declined.
One factor that contributed to the breakup was my plan to move to a different city soon. We had always known that I would move away, but we both thought we could make it work long-distance. She frequently visited the city I would move to, and I traveled for work, so I would return to the city she lived in as well. My attempts at reconnection didn’t go well, and she ultimately decided it was best for us to stop seeing each other.
We share a friend group, so we knew we would eventually run into each other so the ending well sad but amicable.
Fast forward about a week after our breakup, I received news that my move was canceled and that I would be staying in the city we are currently living in. My move was canceled, and I was also broken up with in the same week - it was a difficult week. We weren’t speaking, but word of this spread through our friend group, and she heard about it shortly after I announced it. We remained no contact for a while but continued to follow each other on social media. After about three months of no contact, I ended up unfollowing her, and making her unfollow me as that personally helps me move on.
Fast forward six months after unfollowing, and here we are today. We recently attended a mutual friend’s party and reunited after a long time. It felt like we had never parted ways. Although we didn’t have much time to talk, the atmosphere was comfortable on both sides. I offered to walk her to her car, and she happily accepted. During our walk, she expressed her missed feelings and mentioned wanting to reach out multiple times but stopping herself. I reciprocated her sentiments. She said something like, “If you ever want to grab coffee and catch up, I’m more than happy to invite you. I’d text you tomorrow if I could.” I responded with something like, “I’m still unsure about my feelings, but I’ll definitely reach out soon.” We left it at that, and the mood was very positive.
Two days later, I reached out to her, expressing my happiness at seeing her again, thanking her for coming to the party, and suggesting we catch up over coffee if she was still available. About two hours passed, and she replied to my message, but then deleted it almost immediately. I never got to see what was said. It’s been a couple of days now, and there’s been no response from her.
I’m curious about what might have happened. I’ll never know unless she tells me, but I find her behavior odd. Ultimately, I don’t think I makes a difference as I still have feelings and im not ready to be her friend yet. I would like to express that I would love to be her friend eventually and that my distance has nothing to do with her, but instead my feelings. I just don’t want to get hurt by trying to be her friend (I’m a e7 ofc hahah), however that may end up looking. I contemplated sending that in a text but I didn’t want to regret an opportunity for reconnection. Better to try and have it not work out than to not try at all, imo!
Anyway, If anyone has any insights or guesses about what it could mean or why it happened, I’d greatly appreciate hearing your thoughts!
Thanks!