u/Typical_Grocery4244

https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/s/77W5asgbZc

Imagine a posts where people are judging women for not being or doing something's and saying that women need to be more feminine, secure in their feminity, be more submissive kind of stuff?

When I read the comments, the number of times people were talking about masculinity, men to be secure in themselves or their masculinity. It reminded me of all the times people on the internet try to push men to be not insecure, not angry, advising them to adjust or grow even if the advice for similar posts made by women have a more different, kind, sympathetic tone to them.

And Gods, this shit is so awful, like why tf are these people pressuring men to be all these things.

Insecurities and emotional/mental issues are signs of something gone wrong and need a lot of proper self navigation and more importantly, proper guidance to navigate their their own self, emotions, and are something even most psychologists would approach carefully.

This is kind of f'ed up and would just make most young guys or men try to do stupid shit to get approval from people/society to not be seen as a "toxic" guy, but then they would be called "Performative males/men" and this just goes on without no end.

And gods, we need more people not only preaching about how to be better and good, but also those who explain about these things and teach most men to ignore these bs or fight against them and not just to respect and be kind to other, but also to not accept it if someone doesn't even gives basic respect or kindess towards them.

Women expect too much from men, but are not self aware of half of them, and then make statements like "the bar is so low of men", "a high value or too many is an average women", "being kind, good-looking, well settled is the bare minimum for a relationship".

Like these statements ignore or dismiss the gender norms places on the men and and ridiculing them for not meeting any standards.

Like a man has to be good looking, charming, funny, well settled, intelligent, confident, and more and it just gets more and more insane. Like having enough of these qualities is ok, but a man has to go above/beyond them to even standout and get a date. And most women are not all or even most of these and still expect the man to have most of them.

And having to here "bare minimum" statements, dismissing the efforts it is needed for men to get better without any feedback or guidance or anything, on top of other important things in life.

No wonder most guys are giving up/dropping out of dating.

It seems like the standards for men are being risen more since a few years and it will rise even more.

For men, its being beautiful (height, looks, penis size, er ) and even their personality should not give a hint of mysogyny even if he just hates any sexism, against both men and women. Even if he tries something, there is no proper feedback or guide for it that works and helps men figure it out. Like the return are not worth the effort to look good for men.

And the job and money he makes, which should be equal or more than the women. Like I heard most relationships where the women is the bread winner or earns more money have more abuse than others, if the victim is the man.

And there is a sense of entitlement whenever women mention that they know a women who is highly succesful and intelligent and most men reject here for that and dating has been hard for her. If a guy said said this, people would critisize him for thinking women owe him if he is earning more money or is successful or smart.

And the way men are reacting and how society and everyone is double downing on it, I feel like there will be a lot of men who would either give up or get burnt out and stop dating completely.

And this added with male hate and putting down men is increasing a lot which just makes it much worse for the men to feel positive about life.

Most men just have no self esteem or confidence in themselves.

And it seems like this will go on for a long time.

Edit: like I literally seen some posts here where some dude were arguing with women that most women are lesbian/bi with more learning onto women but date men cause it is hard to date women or that most women are facing comphet and some crazy sht.