I don't think that I can work 5 days a week and idk what to do about it
(English is not my first language, and I write somewhat messy sometimes so apologies beforehand)
I (25f) am in some sort of program that checks my limit as to how much I am capable to do workwise and with the help of them I got to "work" in a daycare while I get paid by them to do so. As of now I work 3 days in a row a week and has currently been there for a little bit over 2 years (it's a slow process in my case) and it's gonna step to 4 days a week in a couple of weeks. I am in this program because I don't have this "drive" to do.. anything unless I get instructed to do so and the people at this daycare were kind enough to take me in and help me.
I got diagnosed w ADD & "generalized anxiety disorder" back in 2018. I went back again to check (because I thought I had a learning disability) in 2022 and my ADD changed to ADHD + they removed the anxiety disorder and instead diagnosed me w "low level" Autism.
I wake up at 6 am and get home at around 6-7-8pm depending on how kind the travel times are to me by not having late buses. I also live with my parent atm and we live in the middle of nowhere.
I really enjoy working this "job" (which is contradictory to the title but we will get there). It's nice working with the kids but the parts I enjoy working with more is helping my coworkers with cleaning tasks while they 'handle' the kids. Idk it just brings me so much joy knowing that I can help with stuff that they don't have time for because they need to get the kids ready for the next part of the day.
The biggest part of my struggles with this isn't even the job, but the time it takes to get to and from said job. I spend roughly 4-5 hours a day getting ready, leaving for work and coming home, and within that timeframe I also walk like.. I think it's roughly 4 km back and forth from work. And that's on a good day considering that I sometimes get home at 7-8 pm now as well. I spend the rest of the week/weekend recovering from the workdays and on fridays I spend most of the day cleaning our home because I want to be at least somewhat useful.
And.. yeah. I don't think that I can do 5 days a week. I really wont know unlless I try but I just feel like I won't be doing anything else in that case. I get home, shower, eat dinner and then go sleep because I don't have the energy to do anything else which sucks.
Ive been on and off about wanting to get a drivers licence but I frustratingly cant. And it sounds so lazy and I am fully aware that it sounds lazy but I just can't do anything. My mind is only drawing a blank and I don't know how to explain it in any other way. It's like one of those invisible walls in video games.
I don't know what kind of response I am expecting sending this, I guess it's mostly for vent reasons. If anyone has advice I wouldn't mind if you shared it but I don't know what kind of advice I am looking for.