u/Vast_Poem_3072

I’m from Gwalior, Madhya Pradesh. Last December, I met a guy through an arranged-marriage setup. He’s an Army officer, and I found him decent, modern and open-minded, so I agreed to the marriage after one meeting because our families wanted us to decide quickly.
Over the next few months, we got close and planned to get engaged in July. I was completely honest with him about myself—I’m spiritual, feminist, wear Western clothes, occasionally drink, and had a boyfriend in college whom I couldn’t marry because our parents disagreed over caste. He knew all of this and acted completely accepting.
I also genuinely cared for him and his family. I gifted his sister things for her birthday, made him laddoos, and sent him care packages during his mountaineering course.
In February, our families had a small roka. His family demanded a car, and my family gave him a Creta worth around ₹14 lakh, along with an Apple Watch, AirPods, a gold ring for his grandmother and other gifts.
A few months later, shortly before our engagement, he suddenly said he didn’t want to marry me because our vibes didn’t match.
I accepted his decision. My family initially tried to convince him, but eventually we agreed to part ways. We simply asked for the money/property given during the marriage arrangement to be returned.
It has now been four months, and he has returned only around ₹4 lakh. He refuses to return the rest.
Instead, he has started telling our relatives about my past and portraying me as an “immoral” woman. Things I told him privately because I trusted him are now being used to shame me and my family.
My question is: what does my character have to do with returning money/property?
He has every right to decide he doesn’t want to marry me. I never forced him. But does that give him the right to keep everything my family gave him? And can he use my private personal information to damage my reputation and pressure my family into giving up their claim?
I understand that gifts/dowry have complicated legal distinctions, so I’m looking for practical legal advice, particularly from people familiar with matrimonial/property matters in Madhya Pradesh.
What should our next step be? And can his actions regarding my personal information amount to defamation or another legal offence?
Please keep the discussion focused on the legal situation rather than judging my personal life.

I’m from Gwalior, Madhya Pradesh. Last December, I met a guy through an arranged-marriage setup. He’s an Army officer, and I found him decent, modern and open-minded, so I agreed to the marriage after one meeting because our families wanted us to decide quickly.
Over the next few months, we got close and planned to get engaged in July. I was completely honest with him about myself—I’m spiritual, feminist, wear Western clothes, occasionally drink, and had a boyfriend in college whom I couldn’t marry because our parents disagreed over caste. He knew all of this and acted completely accepting.
I also genuinely cared for him and his family. I gifted his sister things for her birthday, made him laddoos, and sent him care packages during his mountaineering course.
In February, our families had a small roka. His family demanded a car, and my family gave him a Creta worth around ₹14 lakh, along with an Apple Watch, AirPods, a gold ring for his grandmother and other gifts.
A few months later, shortly before our engagement, he suddenly said he didn’t want to marry me because our vibes didn’t match.
I accepted his decision. My family initially tried to convince him, but eventually we agreed to part ways. We simply asked for the money/property given during the marriage arrangement to be returned.
It has now been four months, and he has returned only around ₹4 lakh. He refuses to return the rest.
Instead, he has started telling our relatives about my past and portraying me as an “immoral” woman. Things I told him privately because I trusted him are now being used to shame me and my family.
My question is: what does my character have to do with returning money/property?
He has every right to decide he doesn’t want to marry me. I never forced him. But does that give him the right to keep everything my family gave him? And can he use my private personal information to damage my reputation and pressure my family into giving up their claim?
I understand that gifts/dowry have complicated legal distinctions, so I’m looking for practical legal advice, particularly from people familiar with matrimonial/property matters in Madhya Pradesh.
What should our next step be? And can his actions regarding my personal information amount to defamation or another legal offence?
Please keep the discussion focused on the legal situation rather than judging my personal life.

Hi everyone! I'm a NIFT graduate and textile designer. I previously worked at Trident Group as an Executive Textile Designer. I'm now in the process of launching my own fashion label in Gwalior and am looking for someone with experience in pattern making, garment construction, and a good understanding of the local market.
This is a full-time, salaried opportunity. If you're interested or know someone who might be a good fit, please feel free to reach out!