r/IndianInLaw

I thought to come back with an update 😮‍💨

It’s been two months of blissful no contact for me, and very low contact for DH. We have been so peaceful and are doing great (knock on wood). A lawyer has been engaged and everything house related is going through him. MIL continued, or at least tried to continue with her demands and the lawyer put her straight. She accused DH of breaking up the family, but he is finally seeing it differently. The therapist is also helping healing the child in him. Things are moving in a positive direction, while not all days are easy we are staying strong . We are putting us first. It was a long journey to get here and i thank each and everyone who commented and gave their inputs. I might come back with crazy mil stories in future, but for now we are on a break 😂

For anyone interested they can read my previous posts on here about the nightmare scenarios with MIL.

After many fights and talks and therapy sessions, my bf started to open his eyes to what was actually happening. He acknowledged the toxic behaviour of his mum and the intensive relationship she has with him.

The latest incident:

On Sunday we had MIL over for lunch for the very first time after moving into the new house in Aug. We were under the impression that she is behaving well and we left the past fights in the past. Little did we know we were in for a surprise. To our luck a portion of the porch roof (which has zero structural meaning to the rest of the house) was damaged by the rain and water remains. We didn’t see it as it probably happened during the night, and we spent the morning at home having food and cooking. When MIL came she was the first to see the damage and immediately said she will get a company to fix it. I told my bf she doesn’t have to be involved we are adults we can handle it. He agreed and told her we will call a company and we don’t need her to do anything, he specifically said this to her . She agreed but asked if we would still just keep her in the loop. Stupid of me admittedly, but I did keep her in the loop, i told her that I got an appointment in 1-1.5 weeks, exact date to be determined. Even showed the great reviews of the company. I thought wow this is great we are finally dealing with things like a real family. 2h later after our talk she calls me saying she found another company to come immediately the day after, at 8 AM. Keep in mind it was a workday and both me and bf work full time 8:30-9 till 5/6 depending on the day. On said day I had a doctors appointment at 8:30, and bf wanted to be in office. I said to MIL the other company can come to quote us but not do work on the roof, as she explained that she called them as an emergency service so they had us prioritised. Meaning, where we are located, we pay double the price for said services . I doubled down on saying it is not necessary. She seemed to agree and we hung up. I let my bf now what happened, he was livid. Immediately called her and told her to call the company off. Did she agree? Nope. She still came together with the company at 8 am next morning. Bf was forced to work from home and he did make it clear she crossed a boundary. She then proceeded to ask the company to make the invoice in her name , fine by me, but is now refusing to pay the invoice for the company she hired when we specifically told her multiple times no, and expects us to foot the bill . Bf is standing his ground, and says she needs to pay for it. She threatens with a lawyer/lawsuit again. I wish she would just go ahead and sue us already 😩

Why she wanted the invoice in her name you ask? Wanted to claim tax return benefits on money we spend for upkeep of the house! A nightmare.

BF and I have a united front and aren’t budging. But gosh this is draining… am i overreacting?

Hey everyone, I need some advice because I’m honestly feeling anxious.
I’m currently 7 months pregnant, and my in laws will be visiting us in the U.S. for the very first time. They’ll arrive about 25 days before my due date. My FIL will stay only for a short period, but my MIL will be staying with us for around three months.

The thing is, I’m not extremely close to my in laws, and over the years I’ve had some experiences that have made me uncomfortable, especially with my FIL.

I’ve noticed a pattern where he puts me in awkward situations or says things just to “test my reaction.”

For example, years ago, I wanted to buy a small property with my own savings. During that discussion, he suggested that I put the property in my name and also add my MIL’s name to it. I was shocked because it would have been my investment with my own money and why would I add my MIL name to it?

Another time, when my husband and I bought a property together, he apparently suggested to my husband alone that he should joke about keeping the property only in his own name just to “see my reaction.” My husband refused and later told me about it.

There have also been comments comparing me to my MIL because she spent most of her life cooking and taking care of everyone. I come from a household where both my parents worked and shared responsibilities, so I’ve never believed that being a good DIL means spending all day in the kitchen. Thankfully, my husband has always supported me and has always stood up for me.

Even recently, during a casual conversation, my FIL joked, “What if your wife throws us out of your house one day?” and then looked at my husband as if he expected a reaction. My husband immediately shut it down and said that I’m family and why I do such a thing and it was in middle of a normal conversation which completely weirded me out!

Individually, these comments may sound small, but when they keep happening, they start making you uncomfortable. It feels like I’m constantly being tested or judged, and I don’t understand why.

My husband and I had a love marriage, and I come from a financially independent and highly educated family. Both of my parents had successful careers, my siblings are doctors and engineers, and my parents invested heavily in my education and career, even sending me to the U.S. for my master’s degree.

So it feels strange when comments are made that indirectly make me feel like I’m after my husband’s money or have some ulterior motive. That’s simply not the environment I come from or the values I was raised with.
What hurts even more is that my husband has always been the one supporting his family whenever there’s a major expense like my SIL’s education, emergencies, or other financial needs. So being judged or viewed with suspicion just because I’m his wife feels unfair and honestly very hurtful!

What makes it harder is that my mother-in-law never corrects him. She either stays silent or defends him, which makes me feel like she agrees with these comments.

Now that they’re coming to stay with us especially with me being heavily pregnant and then entering postpartum. I’m feeling nervous and overwhelmed. I want peace during this phase of my life, not unnecessary stress.

Has anyone dealt with a FIL or in laws who constantly make these kinds of comments or try to provoke reactions? How did you handle it? And how did you protect your peace, especially during pregnancy and postpartum?

25F got married 2 years ago through arranged marriage setup. He and his family deceived his income. When I confronted him I was pregnant at that time. There were whole lot of arguments and at the end he and his family ghosted me. Now I am living with my newborn. He has never supported me financially and it didn't bother me for once as I earn pretty well. But what bothers me now is him not being present in my child's life both emotionally and financially. I don't know what to do next because I don't want my child to be in this position.

Me and my husband live in Bangalore. Both of us are working and work from home from our small cozy 2bhk. My in laws (father, mother and sister) are visiting us for 3 weeks and will go back in a week or so. They are a little overbearing but it’s fine, I understand immediate family will come and stay.

However my husbands cousin (22 year old guy, his mama’s son) who studies in a college nearby also comes and lives here on and off. Last June he stayed for around 10 days, then in November he stayed for around 25 days. Now his younger brother (the younger cousin) has also gotten admission in Bangalore and 4 people are coming to drop him. Mama mami elders son and ofcourse the younger son. It gets so difficult to manage house work, and office work. I am not denying that I have a cook and maid but it’s still gets so crowded and overwhelming for me to have them at my house. Also it’s awkward as hell to have two grown up guys living in your house. I feel so restricted and claustrophobic in my own house. My husband helps me as much as he can, but he will not say no to them. I cannot ask him to not have them over and instead book a hotel, this conversation is out of picture.

None of the family member has even once asked me if I am ok having guests like this. We are just informed. I just know the day they are coming, I don’t know when they will be going back. Last time they came in November, they literally came empty handed saying time nahi mila kuch lene ka. Their elder son stays at our house, blocks one room, roams around in hideous shorts, has poor hygiene etc.

What are some ways I can participate as less as possible but still show my displeasure of not being ok with guests coming all the time ?

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I genuinely want to know if I'm overreacting or if this is just one of those generational differences.

My MIL is generally a really nice person, and I truly love her. We usually get along well, which is why this caught me completely off guard.

She was out of town for a few days, and while she was away, I finally cleaned and organized my wardrobe. It had been a mess for months, so I donated some clothes, folded everything properly, and made space. I was actually proud of how it turned out./it came down on my mood

When she came home today, I casually told her, "I cleaned my wardrobe while you were away." Instead of being happy or just saying "nice," she seemed upset. Her reaction surprised me because I honestly wasn't expecting it. She didn't yell, but it was clear she wasn't pleased, and I couldn't understand why.

It's my own wardrobe, in my own room, and I didn't touch any of her things. I wasn't trying to hide anything or be disrespectful—I was just cleaning.

Now I'm sitting here wondering if I unknowingly broke some unspoken rule or if I'm reading too much into her reaction.

Has anyone experienced something similar? Why would someone get upset over cleaning your own wardrobe?

Trust me, I was shocked because i love her right because she's very sweet takes care of me wtv plus I depend on her because I don't have a mom, lost her in 2013.

TL;DR: My generally sweet MIL got upset because I cleaned and organized my own wardrobe while she was out of town. I love her and was genuinely shocked by her reaction. Am I missing some unspoken rule

(P.S. I actually used ChatGPT to help me put my thoughts into words because I was so confused about what had happened.)

To be fair to them, my ILs don’t interfere in my life. We live abroad and visit them once or twice a year, and everyone’s distant but polite to each other. MIL has weird hang ups about eating my cooking (she is Brahmin), but that works out ok since I don’t have to cook. I’ve become thick skinned and don‘t get offended.

However, their incompetence at just running their lives is staggering. To begin with, they have zero savings despite FIL having had a government job with a good pension. True, they were not rich, but they never even tried to save, because they knew my husband is bright and would make money for them. Even that can be excused as normal middle class finances but:

- With FIL’s job, he was eligible for good health insurance. He never did the paperwork. When he had to be hospitalized, we had to pay a lot, which we willingly did, but what a waste when the insurance would have covered some.

- They own an ancestral home in a village. With some work, it could be rented or sold, and help provide them income in retirement. However, it’s been sitting empty for two decades. Because why get your own income when your son will take care of you?

- My husband bought them a flat of their choice. It was a mess because they didn’t do their research. It was shoddily constructed needing a lot of repairs and due to some bungling up, they don’t even have the deed in their name yet. My husband not only had to pay for the repairs but also run around getting them fixed and also identify that things were wrong in the first place, because they didn’t notice! And after all that, it’s not clear they even legally own the place.

- My husband has one brother who doesn’t help either financially or physically, always saying he’s busy. But guess who is the favorite, and which grandkids’ photos are all over the house and which grandkids don’t feature at all?

This is more of a rant than a question. I stay out of all this, but it’s taking up our family money and more than that, a lot of my husband’s time, with minimal gratitude. I’m happy to help support them financially but they’re behaving more helpless and entitled than my six year old kid. Anyone else in a similar situation?

It’s my FIL’s bday this month and ik i can sound irritating to some people here but my FIL has loved me like his own, Stood up for me, took my stand, get me all my fav things to eat, doesn’t pressurise me, only expects me to pay attention to my fitness, career and god.
It’s his first bday with me and i wanna do something nice for him that may make him feel all gooey and senti and he may feel something deep (I don’t have budget to bug gold) (ps: he never had a daughter) (also, he is punjabi but don’t suggest me alcohol bottles lol)

I do not live in India but my brother who lives in Bangalore has been facing mental harassment and physical abuse from his wife last few years as my dad passed away. Suddenly, my mother had to move in with them more than 10 years ago and the wife has made my mother and brother’s life miserable since then there is no solution as my brother has no other place to go, my brother and wife. They have a new apartment in Bangalore, but the daughter-in-law does not want to move there as she wants to kick my mother out of the current home, which is actually paid for and owned by my mother and my brother. I’m sick and tired of this and as my mother is aging, daughter-in-law is increasingly becoming very abusive and I am really worried about her. She’s also started threatening to file false FIR against my mother and brother-in-law and keeps threatening self farm. They have a 10-year-old daughter how do I approach this situation from the legal angle? I do understand the need to collect evidence and I’ve been asking my brother to do so but one he is very scared and second he’s not as sharp and smart. He freezes every time my wife screams. I visited India after 10 years a few months ago and while lyfe was there, she threw a table at my brother for talking to my kids

So I had a love marriage but little did I realize that I was marrying a manchild. It's been around 3 months now but everyday my mil starts her morning by asking me weird questions and every time my Sil is around, they both kind of team up, which I understand, of course she is her daughter, she prefers her over me. But this daughter ( my sil) acts rude to me at times, ignores me at times, gives me unnecessary knowledge at times but I kept ignoring for a long time. But now I am unable to take their shit and apparently my husband is not able to set boundaries with them or even make them understand that they can be wrong at times and now I feel like I am losing respect for my husband and both my Mil and Sil. I feel anxious at the thought of being at my in laws. I mean one morning my mil asked me how do I feel about his son...and when I said ya he is okay, she snapped back saying : no he is too naive for this world and you won't find any guys like him in today's world!! I mean, ????

I just need to rant because this has been driving me up the wall.

Somehow, my mother-in-law has decided that I am the designated communicator for everyone.

She manages everything related to the household staff-hiring, their salaries, leave deductions, and all the decisions. But whenever there's an awkward conversation to be had, apparently that's my job.

She'll literally be standing next to the maid and instead of saying, "Please clean this," she'll turn to me and say, "Tell her to clean it." (It's not a language issue either)

If a maid makes a mistake? I have to point it out.

If leave needs to be deducted? I have to communicate it.

If she wants to let a servant go? She expects me to tell them, even though it's entirely her decision.

And it doesn't stop there.

Whenever we order vegetables over the phone, she'll ask me to make the call to the vendor. Then while I'm already talking to him, she'll keep feeding me instructions every few seconds:

"Tell him to send fresh vegetables."

"Tell him we want good quality only."

"Tell him not to send too much."

"Actually, ask if he has smaller ones."

"Tell him to send a little more."

"Tell him to delivery ASAP"

Instead of just talking to him herself, she uses me as a live relay.

Then there's my husband.

If she wants her son to pick something up on his way home, instead of calling or texting him herself, she'll come into my room and say, "Tell him to bring this."

Why??? am I the messenger? He's literally her son!

It's gotten to the point where I feel less like a family member and more like the household's communications department. I don't make most of these decisions, yet I'm expected to deliver every instruction, request, reminder, and awkward conversation.

I swear, if communication in this house had a flowchart, every arrow would point to me first.

My husband's mother (63ish) is the most annoying person in the world. One of her many annoying behaviours is that she wants everything anybody else has, even if it is NOT something that she needs. She needs an Apple watch, pretty sure it's for show off. She doesn't know that it doesn't work without an Iphone. I guess she'll want an iPhone as well. What for? Show off. She has the habit of taking anything she likes from our cupboard - bedsheets, towels, doormats are a few examples. She asked my husband if she could take it, he said yes. And she would happily send it away to her home. Mind you she never asked me. I had bought those things. Now that she permanently (I hope not) lives with us due to her treatment, she hasn't taken away those things to her home.

But she does it with clothes. I didn't shop much before, so she didn't have much to take away. Whenever we go shopping, she wants tax, God knows what for. Kabhi pyjama laau mai toh she says ki unke liye bhi le aati. Abhi I got a few expensive linen clothes when I went with SIL, woh bhi chahiye tha unko. I bought a tshirt usi shopping session mein for office wear, toh woh bhi poochti thi if she can also wear. Idiot me couldn't say no. I need to say no and stop it for good. I'm anxious to buy stuff because she'll want that too. Why don't her kids and her husband tell her anything about this? I haven't seen anyone who's so "mangta". When I tell my husband that she does this, copies and asks for all that I have, then he says he'll get her that, it's not cut paste, but copy paste. He says imitation is the best form of flattery. I hate it that she copies me. Tell me - why should I do stuff for her when she doesn't do anything in return? And I don't like spending a rupee on her. She's a very toxic person and has made our lives hell.

I had to come to my parents to do office shopping. I'm scared to even take these clothes to where she lives, which is supposed to be my home. Yeh bhi maangne lagengi. What will I tell her if she asks?

"Mera mann nahi tha"

"Nahi, mere se mushkil se shopping hota hai, bohot time lagta hai, kisi aur ke liye shopping is beech nahi kar sakti. Kuch pasand aaye, na aaye, fir return karne ka headache nahi chahiye"

"Nahi, mai share nahi karungi"

"Nahi, aap pehenne ke liye leke wapas nahi karte. Fir apne pehenne ke liye mai aapse maang nahi sakti"

(she did that with the gold jewellery she gave me. Legally it's supposed to be my stridhan even if she gave it to me. She took it away in 2023 and it's 2026. She never returned it. Her cousin gave me gold earrings, she took them away too. She said she would return it to her cuz she can't afford to give that gift at her niece's wedding. What if she gives away the gold to her daughter?)

Pehle I would get stuff for her and SIL whenever I went shopping anywhere. Tab no thank you, nothing. Heck, she doesn't even wear those clothes and passes comments like "yeh toh hamare sthar ka nahi hai".

Yaar she starts talking about how she would wear plain clothes, silk saree, dress, high heels etc. All this even when hum naya dress dikhaate hai. Makes everything all about herself. I'm frustrated, don't know what to do anymore. Help me set boundaries please.

Need some advice

Bf & I have been making plans for our wedding next year.

He earns very well (in $s) is very extravagant, likes to buy expensive things, shoes, clothes, watches etc. Will only travel business class and stay in best of hotels and eat in fancy restaurants over the world. He travels 3-4 times a year, twice of which is holiday. I, on other hand, earn a third of what he earns, live with family so I partly also run my house. I have modest tastes and spend money very judiciously.

During marriage talks, we decided functions would be simple,l and basic but then he wants to have big reception, sangeet etc even though sangeet is not something we do in my community. Now when it comes to gifting he is saying we should buy each other expensive (20lakh +)watch and gold. He clearly said he is expecting it from my father.

I am very conscious of the fact that our spending habits are very different. Honestly he does spoil me every now and then but there is always a hint of it never being reciprocated in the same way by me. He knows I don’t earn as much as he does but I always feel bad and guilty that I am not buying him designer branded gifts. How do I tackle this?

​

My husband and I live in another city for work. My mother‑in‑law has always been very controlling with him. For example, whenever he is out with me, she expects him to call her five times to give updates. Even when we are at home in our place, she calls him multiple times a day to ask what he has eaten, and if he mentions vegetarian food, she makes comments like “so sad” or “how pity,” because he mostly likes to eat non‑vegetarian food. And she makes non veg three times a day at their place.

During my pregnancy, when I was exhausted from office work and household chores, my husband started making his own tea. She criticized this, saying things like, “You never lifted a cup when you were here, but now you make tea daily. You should make it for me too, not just for your wife.” When I complained to my husband, he shouted at me, saying they were “just joking” and that I shouldn’t take their conversations seriously. And especially that i should not over hear their conversations.

As I entered my seventh month, we planned to return to our hometown for delivery and maternity leave. We wanted to book tickets on a weekend, but she insisted we book on the date she chose. After arriving, I went to my parents’ house for my mental peace, while my husband stayed with his parents. I asked him to visit me every weekend, but his mother kept making excuses, arranging last‑minute plans, and even asking him to hide things from me.

Now, in my eighth month, she is forcing him to accompany his brother on a 15–20 day work trip, even though his brother is an adult over 25 and perfectly capable of handling himself. She guilt‑trips my husband, saying as the elder son he must prioritize family. I feel strongly that he should stay in the same city as my due date approaches.

She also insists on tagging along for hospital visits, even entering the consultation room despite my request for privacy. She asks inappropriate personal questions to the doctor, like whether I have stretch marks, and constantly complains about the hospital being “money‑minded,” even though I am the one paying all the medical expenses. In general, my husband only contributes to groceries and rent and my expenses are entirely handled by me, in fact I used to pay him half the rent and stopped after realising that he sends a huge sum of money to his parents on a monthly and quarterly basis, despite my salary being much lower than his.

When the hospital staff called me for a blood test, my husband wanted to accompany me, but she pulled him away to share tea with her. Her controlling behavior, constant nagging, and complaints are straining my marriage. My parents and relatives think this is “normal” mother‑in‑law behavior and advise me to adjust, but I feel it is damaging our relationship. My husband is increasingly irritated with me, and even when he talks to me, the conversation revolves around his mother. And also I stopped contacting him much as my parents and relatives think he is getting suffered and pressurized in between me and his mother.

I feel the spark in our marriage is fading, and I don’t know how to deal with her behavior. Once my husband is at his parents’ house, she controls him completely, and it is harming our married life.

I (30F) got married about 6 months ago and my husband and I live abroad. His parents are currently staying with us, and honestly, the experience has been extremely difficult for me.

From the beginning, my MIL seemed to expect me to completely change who I am. I'm naturally a reserved and independent person, but despite that, I've always tried to be respectful, spend time with them, help around the house, and make them feel welcome.

Whenever I didn't meet their expectations, I was criticized. I've been called hurtful names, cursed, and even told things that felt like they were cursing my marriage. They've also said that my husband has become my "slave" since marrying me.

The biggest issue is that my husband has never really stood up for me in the moment. To be fair, he does speak to them privately afterward and tells me that he supports me, but he never addresses it directly when it happens. As a result, I always feel alone during these confrontations.

Over the last 6 months, I've tried to make amends multiple times—at least 5 times. I've apologized, tried to start fresh, and overlooked a lot of disrespect because I wanted peace in the family.

Last week, things escalated again. I stayed quiet and avoided arguing, but afterward my husband spoke to both his parents. Their response was that everything depends on me fixing the situation. The problem is, I genuinely don't even know what I've done wrong.

For context, I work full-time. After coming home from work, they expect me to sit and talk with them continuously and help in the kitchen. I don't mind helping out, but if I spend some time in my room afterward, that becomes an issue. It feels like having any personal space is seen as disrespectful.

Now my husband says that since his parents are leaving the country permanently soon, we should make one final effort to reconcile. He wants me to go to them, say sorry (even though I don't know what I'm apologizing for), and ask everyone to forget what happened.

The problem is that my heart isn't in it anymore. I'm exhausted. I feel like I've been the only one expected to compromise, and the constant criticism has started affecting my mental health. I'm spiraling into anxiety and depression, and I don't know how much more I can take.

Am I being stubborn or unreasonable for not wanting to apologize again?

My husband recently told me something that has shaken me deeply. He said he is “not into me anymore” and that being in this marriage feels like “labor” for him.
The context is complicated. He has been managing several household responsibilities, including going up and down daily to bring food because of strict kitchen rules set by his mother. Due to ongoing tension around kitchen duties, I stopped participating in that part of the household work.
He also handles other tasks like bringing clothes from outside and organizing things like the almirah. Over time, he seems to feel that the responsibilities are uneven and exhausting.
On top of this, he raised issues about my communication style, lack of physical intimacy, and general dissatisfaction with the marriage. Eventually, he said he doesn’t want to continue in the marriage.
I’m trying to process everything without reacting emotionally, but I genuinely don’t understand how things escalated to this point or whether there is any realistic way to fix it.

My husband just like that uses out bad words during arguments, name calls (like bitch and other derogatory words). He says he doesn’t mean them just letting his frustration. Now I am 8 months pregnant, during pregnancy also he has done it so many times, including last week. I break down everytime. Last week it triggered my vomiting and only few days before I was admitted in hospital for diarrhoea and vomiting. I was already very much stressed.He just says he has reduced it so much and I am always making a fuss about this. He can’t try any further it is either divorce or him taking his own life. We have been married for five years after so much dilemma I decided to become pregnant but I regret being pregnant. I think is I told about to
his mom and my mom but even then no change. He fights with me asking why I told them. With baby I don’t know how I things will be. Mostly I have already planned to live separately.

What are some examples of the most ridiculous things that in-laws tell their daughter-in-laws?

I will go first.

Once, I raised concerns about how MIL's emotional abuse, toxicity and taunts are affecting my husband's mental wellbeing (this is truth!) and FIL jumped in to say "why should he have mental issues he is our son he has to listen and tolerate. Before he is your husband, he is our son first. Only after we die he will be your husband".

I am curious if it's just my in-laws who say ridiculous things like this or others too.

I'm a 28F living in Bangalore in a flat owned by my mom. I've been staying here for the last four years without paying rent, although I do pay the maintenance charges and have spent my own money on the interiors.

Recently, my mother sent me a legal notice asking me to vacate the flat. I intend to leave, but I wanted to know whether she can legally do this even though I've invested money in the property.

She has also sent a legal notice to my boyfriend demanding rent for the two years he stayed here, claiming he owes around 15 lakhs. There was never any rent agreement, I believe this is being done to harass us and pressure me into ending my relationship, as my parents strongly oppose my boyfriend and don't want me to marry him.

On top of this, my parents wants me to sign a declaration stating that if I marry my boyfriend against their wishes then

• They will not be responsible for me in any way and they will disown me if I choose to marry him against their wishes.

• suppose If anything happens to me in the future, they will have no liability.

• If my boyfriend or his family ever demand money for any rituals or expenses, my parents will have no obligation to pay anything.

I think this declaration is being used as a means of pressuring me into breaking up with my boyfriend. Can my mother legally recover two years' rent from my boyfriend when there was never any rent agreement?

I'm planning to consult a lawyer, but I'd appreciate some general legal guidance before I do.

I do not live in India but my brother who lives in Bangalore has been facing mental harassment and physical abuse from his wife last few years as my dad passed away. Suddenly, my mother had to move in with them more than 10 years ago and the wife has made my mother and brother’s life miserable since then there is no solution as my brother has no other place to go, my brother and wife. They have a new apartment in Bangalore, but the daughter-in-law does not want to move there as she wants to kick my mother out of the current home, which is actually paid for and owned by my mother and my brother. I’m sick and tired of this and as my mother is aging, daughter-in-law is increasingly becoming very abusive and I am really worried about her. She’s also started threatening to file false FIR against my mother and brother-in-law and keeps threatening self farm. They have a 10-year-old daughter how do I approach this situation from the legal angle? I do understand the need to collect evidence and I’ve been asking my brother to do so but one he is very scared and second he’s not as sharp and smart. He freezes every time my wife screams. I visited India after 10 years a few months ago and while lyfe was there, she threw a table at my brother for talking to my kids.

Hey, sorry to post it here I just created this account so I don't have karma or age required and I'm in lot of trouble rn so please bear with me

So I'm 24M from Chhattisgarh, I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend (Marwari, from Rajasthan) for the past 4 years, we know each other well and love each other. We're both from tier 1 colleges, so we're independent and earn good money.

Lately, my girlfriend's parents have been asking her to get married soon. According to them, it's already very late that she's 24 and still unmarried and they're constantly pressuring her.

She has talked about me to her parents and fought to let her marry me. After a lot of convincing, her parents finally agreed to a love marriage, but with the condition that we get married within a year they don't want to wait at all.

Now, 24 feels too early for me. I have my whole life ahead of me, and marriage is such a big decision that I don't want to rush into without fulfilling my other goals. I really love my girlfriend and want to marry her down the line, but the timing isn't right for me now. I promised her and her parents that we could get engaged now and marry 5 years later, but no one is willing to consider it.

They're saying that if I back out 5 years later, no one will marry my girlfriend, since her age is already an issue and there isn't much time left for her to decide.

I understand how much my girlfriend fought with her parents to convince them and she's just asking for one thing, so I don't want to hurt her feelings or make her think I'm doing everything on my own terms.

I'm feeling so torn, Idk what to do. On top of that, my parents aren't happy with this rush either. They're okay with me marrying my girlfriend but even they're saying it's too early as none of my cousins or friends are married yet.

They also don't want me to get married before my sister, who is 30 and still unmarried. Idk theirogic but they want her to get married first.

Also my girlfriend's parents see my unmarried 30-year-old sister as some kind of red flag about my family idk how my sister being unmarried at 30 is such issue for them, I don't understand how does it matter if she is unmarried.

I was preparing for my masters abroad and now all this pressure to get married now making me go berserk, I'm feeling really torn and have no idea what to do.