[26M/23F] Am I delusional or does this girl actually like me? (NEED ADVICE)
Last year around July, I attended a youth debate conference in Toronto and met a girl there — let’s call her Lucia. She’s Asian Puerto Rican, studies at UofT, and I’m from UBC.
During the 5-day conference, we spent a lot of time talking and getting to know each other. I ended up staying in Toronto for 2 extra days after the conference, and during that time Lucia still made the effort to meet me at the St. George campus. She literally traveled from Mississauga to Toronto two days in a row just to hang out, have fun, and spend time together before I left.
On my last day before heading back, we hugged at the metro station and said we’d keep in touch.
Lucia’s personality is kind of ambiverted — she’s logical, reserved, and carries herself in a very professional way, but she’s also fun and easy to talk to once she opens up. She’s also not really into social media. She barely uses it and mostly just communicates through WhatsApp. She’s very focused on self-development, org work, studies, and work, so she’s honestly a pretty busy and disciplined person overall.
Since then, we’ve been keeping in touch mostly through Zoom calls about once a month, and our calls usually last around 2–4 hours. I’m honestly the one who initiates the catch-ups almost every time, which is one reason I’m confused about everything. But at the same time, whenever we do talk, the conversations become really long and meaningful naturally.
One time, though, we accidentally talked for 8 hours straight. I didn’t have classes that day and was just studying while talking to her, but she actually skipped two classes and stayed on call with me until 5 PM. I even told her I was worried I might affect her academics, but she said, “I just enjoy spending time with you.”
There was also another time when we talked from 9 PM until midnight, and I later found out she stayed in the library the entire time because she had already used all her mobile data and didn’t have Wi-Fi at home.
Our most recent catch-up was last month, and during that call she mentioned that I’m one of the only people — and the person who has stayed in touch with her the longest — despite us living far away from each other. She also said she enjoys spending time talking with me. At one point she mentioned that she actually prefers talking once a month rather than every day because “if you talk every day, what’s even left to update each other about?”
Another thing that stuck with me: during my stay in Toronto, we played “Never Have I Ever” with her friends, and she mentioned that she’s open to long-distance relationships. She also joked that she doesn’t really care if a guy is big or small. I honestly don’t know if that was indirectly aimed at me or not.
Now I’m confused because I really like her, but I don’t want to become delusional and assume she likes me back when she’s maybe just being friendly.
My sister keeps saying, “Bro, obviously she likes you,” but one of my friends thinks this is just normal behavior and that it doesn’t necessarily mean anything — especially since I’m usually the one initiating conversations.
The thing is, I’m planning to do an internship in the UK next year, so there’s a chance I might not see her again for 1–2 years. Part of me wants to just shoot my shot and confess either online or the next time we meet.
So I genuinely need advice: does this sound like she might actually like me, or am I reading too much into it?