u/WhatAShitName

Hi all. Just a small update and vent post for the 10 people who commented on my post a week or so ago about whether or not I should ask a friend out before she moves away.

I thought about it for days, and ultimately decided to ask one morning bored at work. I tried to keep it simple but honest, along the lines of "hey I've been thinking about you, are you free some time next week? I'd like to take you out on a date."

The result? She said she was flattered, but that she doesn't really like dating. I've been fed enough dating content on social media to assume that this is essentially a rejection. I was/am a little sad, but I wanted to leave it light-hearted and said that if she changes her mind to let me know (in the rare case that it isn't an actual rejection). I don't think I want to pry further either as I'm not trying to seem/be desperate (I'm genuinely not). I still want to stay friends - I just wanted to see if there was anything more to it. I guess I misread some things, and I think I've grown enough to admit and accept that.

Asking someone out in real life is tough. All things considered, though, it's not as bad as I thought. I'm hoping that the next couple days of emotional pain and closure will be a lot better than thinking "what if" for even longer. Thanks for listening.

Hi all. I have a friend who I've been getting to know more. She's very interesting and fun to talk to, but she's moving soon to pursue a career in a new city (not far, a few hours away at most).

At a dinner with some other friends, we were reminiscing over some work experiences when the topic of dating came up. For some reason, she brought up that she was playing with the idea of going on a date before moving just as a personal goal, but that she ultimately gave up because modern dating sucks (which it does - I would very much like to stay off the apps) and she has no time. On one hand, I think it would be fun to ask her to a small date just to say she did it and see how it goes, considering we have done lunches and small group functions together.

On the other hand, I have no clue what the fuck I'm doing when it comes to dating - I haven't been on one since before the pandemic. Her circumstances all scream "she's actually not interested/she's too busy," but at this point in my life I would rather be rejected than dream of "what if" anymore.

Would it really kill the friendship if I asked? Should I keep my feelings to myself, or should I take a chance before she moves on to a new chapter of her life? I am in need of anonymous, third-party advice. Thanks.