u/Willows_Whiten

I've homeschooled from the start. One of my kiddos has ADHD, and in the younger years it's not been too rough- lots of games, and focus on the essentials (math, reading, writing).

But now that she's older (4/5th grade, soon to be 11yo) and puberty is really ramping her ADHD up, it's really hard to get through to her. I'll tell her something and she'll misquote me massively. She forgets sooo much. She talks a mile-a-minute, still interrupts almost every conversation, asks me questions like a 3yo but also rapid-fire, not letting me answer. It's like she's berserking on caffeine and won't just STOP and be calm for a moment (unless she's watching a movie. She can sit for that for hours if I let her).

And, since I also have a toddler, I'm super overwhelmed because the toddler does this too (age appropriate for the toddler, not so much for the tween).

She's unmedicated.
How am I going to teach her the essentials (math, reading, writing) and also history and science?

She won't go outside to expend energy on a regular basis.

I know ADHD peaks around this age.
I need help. Thoughts. Plans. Ideas.

I've read all the ADHD books- I need homeschool specific ADHD books (I've read How to Get Your Kid Off the Fridge and on to Learning. I need more).

Night four- success!

After our usual routine (jammies, book with warm milk, brush teeth) My toddler went down without a fuss, and while she DID wake up around midnight (as with every other night) SHE DIDN'T SCREAM!
She did a little light crying while she got up from her bed (in my room) and moved to my bed, but then she plopped down and went to sleep next to me without asking for boobie. 🤯

She had a couple more "micro wakeups" (little whimpers but not really awake) but nothing related to wanting boobie, and I didn't have to do anything more than put my hand on her back.

Around 4:00am she did ask for boobie for the first time, and as I braced myself for the emotional onslaught, I told her boobie is still asleep.

And she started to scream...

...for all of one minute!😄

You guys, I think we've crossed a major milestone.

She slept until about 6:00 when we got up for "morning boobie".

I feel like we're on the downward slope! 🙌🏼

Good luck to all you out there getting ready to wean!🫡

You CAN do this!

Night three: https://www.reddit.com/r/weaningsupport/s/oChFCesuyB

Night three basically summed up: just as many wake ups, but less duration each.

She was more amped up before bed this time. Kept getting up from bed and wandering around, and I would remind her it's bedtime and to go lie down.

But, she didn't ask for boobie until almost asleep, then when I said boobie was asleep, she said "okay" and laid her head down and fell asleep.

Again she woke during the midnight hour. Screaming for boobie. Running around. Angry.
Noise cancelling headphones dull the sound but it's still jarring.

This is getting old.

But, she screamed for less time, maybe 15 minutes.

She woke up 2-3 more times, screaming for boobie.
I lost track of the hours.

Unfortunately I had trouble sleeping between the wakeups, and feel totally wrecked today.

I really hope night four she wakes up less and less screaming. 😫

Night two: https://www.reddit.com/r/weaningsupport/s/2LfUSGEcog

The second night was better!
She went down without a fuss.

I did her routine- jammies, warm cinnamon milk with a book, brush teeth, then we rocked in the chair for a bit to help her get sleepy.
After a few minutes, she was ready to lay down.
She asked for boobie just once, and seemed to accept it when I said they were asleep.
She laid on her bed and I rubbed her back while playing her musical seahorse (glows and plays soft classical pieces).
She sat up a couple times for a hug, then went back down and fell asleep.

She stayed asleep until 12:30, at which point she asked for boobie...and then the screaming began.
Screaming, flailing, and running around for a half hour, maybe more, but eventually I was able to pick her up and stand while rocking her in my arms, which soothed her enough to go back to bed, where she fell asleep on my chest while I rubbed her back.
I couldn't sleep for awhile after that.

She woke at 4:00am, screamed and ran around for 15-ish minutes, then let me hold her (standing) to sway and rub her back.
5:00am- same thing.
Lather, rinse, repeat.

And even though the night wakings were hard, the night was overall MUCH better than the first night! She woke for good around 7:00, and I said, "it's morning- see the sunshine? You can have Morning Boobie now!" and we went to the living room to have that first nursing.

Just getting past that first night, and even though it's still hard it's not as hard. I'll let you know how night three goes. 😂
Eventually I will get more than 2-3 hour blocks of sleep. 🫣

Night one: https://www.reddit.com/r/weaningsupport/s/ws4bobcmMP

I'm night weaning my 27mo.
She would comfort nurse through the night, waking me 3-5x a night (we cosleep).
I needed to start getting more sleep.

Sorry for any typos, I'm exhausted.

Last night was our first night with no boobie. I told her boobie is going to sleep just like she sleeps, and will be awake when the sun comes up (for us that's 5:30-6:00am).

I put on a long shirt (to discourage nursing, and as a symbol to her that boobie is asleep), then we started her night routine: jammies, a cup of warm cinnamon milk to drink with a book, brush teeth, then bed.

She was fine and happy up to that moment when we went to lie down and she asked, "boobie?" as if she hadn't heard me tell her all day that boobie was going to sleep.

And oooohh boy. The screaming. She screamed and screamed until her little body shook. I tried to sing to her and rock, but I could barely hold her she was flailing so much.

My husband came in and held her for a little while just to give my arms a break (she's really strong. How is a toddler so strong??) Then I took her back and rocked her while he distracted her by quietly making two of her stuffies dance like a puppet show. 🤷🏻‍♀️

She fell asleep! Yay!

I stayed in the rocker another 15min to make sure she was in a deep sleep, then moved her to the bed.

Oops. She woke up.
More screams. Here comes round two, and I'm still (figuratively) bloody and bruised from round one.

I put on noise cancelling headphones (RECOMMEND) while trying to hold her flailing body like a badly dancing octopus. 🤦🏻‍♀️

More screaming. She gets up, runs around the room like a shrieking chicken, pulls things off the wall in sheer anger. Falls to the floor and cries.

I glance at my "night weaning encouragement notes" on the wall; remember why I'm doing this.
I play encouraging music in my ear and go pick her up again.

Eventually she wears out and falls asleep on my chest, sweaty and hiccuping.

It's not even 9:00. The whole night still lies before us.

I think she woke up around midnight, but I don't remember. It's kind of a blur.

Then, thankfully she sleeps for a couple more hours, on me. I wake up at 2:00 for some unknown reason, and lie awake for a bit. She rolls off me- better go pee while I can!
I come back quickly.

She wakes up.

Here we go. Round three. Or is it four? Headphones slip on like a boxer donning his gloves. Somber, but determined.

She screams for less time. It feels more brutal because of the hour, but I'll take the positive bit. Gotta stay positive.
She eventually passes out again, on me.

5:30 she wakes. Asks for boobie. I don't want to go through this again.
I can't nurse in the bed though- I have to break that.

So I say, let's go see if the sun's up.

We go to the living room and there's the faintest glow of dawn just beginning, but I take it.

"Look! The sun is rising. That means boobie is awake!" Then I remove the shirt tunic (which will undoubtedly become a symbol of trauma for her 🙄) with a flourish, push the button on my coffee pot, and she nurses. Exhausted, but happy to be reunited with boobie again.

She fell asleep. This is where we are now.
Should I nurse for naptime? Or is that confusing? No clue

For now, she's happy, I'm exhausted but I've got coffee. The house is quiet.

I survived night one. Will night two go better?

Hey all.
My toddler is 2 (27 months), and still breastfeeding day and night.
She has a great appetite for food, so this is purely for comfort.

I want to night wean (just night).
She wakes up 3-4x every night and I'm so tired, it's time.

Thing is, she wants boob for every emotional upset- got hurt? Booby. Sister won't play with her? Doesn't get what she wants? Booby.

She's also been nursing to sleep since she was born... I've been trying to implement a new nighttime routine before we start the night weaning (jammies, teeth, book, bed with song) but lately she just. Wants. Boobie.
No book, fights teeth, even fights jammies.

What I'm planning to do is tell her boo-boo is going to sleep at night, so there will be no boo-boo until the sun is up. Then offer her warm milk with a book.
This worked with my other kiddo, but I don't know...I foresee some ROUGH nights.
I've read some women use bandaids over their breasts? Does that work?

My husband can help some nights but can't take her all night long;

Is this just a grit-my-teeth-and-get-through-this-because-its-going-to-suck kinda thing?

Tips from those who let their toddler fall asleep with boobie?

D-Day is next Tuesday night, by the way.