Am I the a whole for not wanting my stepdad to propose to my mom?
Okay so I want to know if I’m the a hole or not. So from the start when I was five years old my mom met this dude named Lewis, I truly never let it go that my dad died when I was only four and my mom moved on so fast. Then this is were it all went down because me and my two older sisters lets call them C and G, you see C and G loved each other the did, but they would also fight a lot and I think when he came in they felt uncomfortable, I felt kind of sick when I first met him but I told myself new start right? wrong, how terribly wrong was my five year old brain was. he acted like he was my dad which I hated and my mom would but him back in place which I appreciated because he would sit there and get in my face and yell at me and spit in my face, he did that to C and G as well and thats when they really started to get tired of him. Us four were doing fine together because C and G were smart, mom had a good job and we had a two story apartment if that makes since, I think it was at sandpiper apartments, and I really just being a dumb five year old with my brain cells kicking in. It really wasn’t much of a problem because we were all girls, until he got my mom pregnant with my little sister, I’ll call her A since me, her and my mom name starts with an a which can kind of get tricky but Ill try to keep our names simple. But when he moved in he said he would help with bills and never did and that’s when we got an eviction and had to move to Citronelle to live with my grandma and mom had A in Mobile and A was in the ICU because mom HAD to give birth early from all the stress of moving and lifting heavy things, and this is the part that messed me up he didn’t even try to help, he just disappeare. Then he popped back up when Ava was born and really did visit like that, when I was around 6 or 7 years old we moved into ”The crossings at cottage hill” I will admit me and my little sister was bad, we did a lot of things that would make people gasp, if you looked at us you would think were angles but when you got to know us, oh boy. That when things got bad, he started twisting the narrative on my sisters and yeah they argued and broke things so he used that and to his advantage and make them seem disrespectful and gross and yeah sometimes they would be but only because they had the best reasons and I’ll tell you more about that later in the story because he made me feel that type of way too. one day Lewis and C got into a argument about C using my moms bathroom which was so petty of his even though she did have a bathroom he was just being mean and she told him to get out of her face and he started choking her and she called the police and she showed them the marks and he got arrested. see this is the part my mom was mad about, he told her he was leaving because he kept doing this thing were he’d be there for a while and then disappea for however long he wanted and come back, so when he lied to my mom and did that she was angry but not just that she absolutely hated the fact he put his hand on C. After that is when C and G started going to CPS and telling them some things, and I didn’t make it better because the only thing I did was instigate, and by that I meam telling my sisters something what Lewis and mom said and telling mom what they said, all I did was make it worse and I still hate myself for doing that, because that was what really threw to gasoline on the fire. But we ended up getting evicted from there to because again he did the same thing, say he was going to help with bills and never even glanced at a paper, I only remembered him having one job for about a month before I think he quit or lost the job. So we my grandma came to help us, if I didn’t say this earlier when we moved the first time she helped too, we moved out as much as we could but we didn’t have enough space to carry the glass for the dining room set he convinced mom to get we have the parts of the table and the chairs just not the glass, and to get a new glass is almost $500 to $600. The new king sized bed and dresser mom got that he convinced mom to get, if you notice he always does a lot of convincing, but we lived there for about almost 3 years until my mom saved up enough to get a new apartment, it isn’t in the best shape but it was something. But They had many kitchen incident, I might do that another time because I have way too much on my mind and it’s like 2:21 in the morning that I am writing this, not to mention my 6th and 7th grade year trauma. But he just showed me a ring around 12 something just two hours ago he wanted to prop to mom, to be honest mom was telling grandma about how she really didn’t want him here to begin with because of all he put her through. And also so to get this off my chest, one night we were at the golden nugget and we stayed there for two nights and we had two separate beds for me and A and one for Lewis and mom and I went throug his search history and found porn tabs, like the whole thing was main porn videos and stuff and I was disgusted because this man was 63 and my mom was 40 she really didn’t want to be bothered with his old a anyway, not to mention he drinks and smokes and my mom absolutely hates that, she doesn’t do any of that stuff at all, I haven’t seen that woman drink wine or anything not a day in my life. she hates the taste of any type of alcohol, my mom’s side doesn’t drink or smoke, the least they will all drink is wine and only about two or three times have I seen my moms side drink wine before and mom didn’t even have any. and she absolutely hates when he gets in bed smelling like cigarettes and weed. This was a couple nights before when we were all hungry and he had mom drive somewhere so he could give his brother some food that was literally a grown man thats an acholic meanwhile we were all ready to eat our food, our stomachs were literally growling and he had mom drive somewhere else and tried to ask if he could stay for a drink and mom snapped and she was not having it and she shut that down real fast, we left and went home but the whole car ride mom was pissed and they were arguin. as soon as we got home we went out to drink and smoke and he came in later talking about going to drive to the store to buy some more cigars when he just had one yesterda, and he wasn’t about to drive moms car because he had already wreck her maroon car and she got a white carolla Toyota that a guy he had working on moms car messed it up even worse and mom stopped trusting him with her car. so he walked and had been gone for hours and the store is like down the street, even a snail could go to the store and come right back faster than he did, it was like 2 or 3 when he came back and while he was out he pocket dialed A phone and she gave it to mom and he wasn’t talking crap about how he did this and that and how she was tripping to his friends or whoever, when first off the stuff he got mom already had in the storage and was going to get until he decided to do it. Not to mention the whole time they have been together mom was the only one with a job bedside that one month he had a job. But when he came back she went off, she yelled that he wasnt going to disrespect her house like he used too, she said “if he did it again “then don’t bother coming back and I put that on god, on my life I’m done with that bs” yeah she was really tired of him, the next morning she was on the phone with grandma telling her about it because Lewis had practically destroyed her friend circle. She said he’s not bringing any money for bills and not helping, she was also talking about other things he did like he has a whole big bottle of alchlol and it was almost gone in two days. but a day after that I didn’t see the bottle again so I was vacuuming the carpet and I moved the box that our fireplace used to be in until I finally built it and I look in the box and see the big empty bottle and I said oh hell no. I pushed the box back in the box were it was and left that crap alone, he was supposed to take it to the dumpster but never did because his back always hurts, but it never seems to hurt when he wants some beer or liquor, me and A wanted to go to the pool and he said his back was hurting and never took us. but the thing that got me was he said he was going to VISIT for a little while then said he was staying until August the 11, that’s the whole summer I have to spend with this bum. But what’s been really driving me insane is the living room tv. the walls are thin so you can practically hear the tv, especially because my room is right next to the living room and all I hear are his stupid shows play form early in the morning to almost 3 or 4 in the morning and then he spends all day watching tv then go to sleep then get back up and watch tv and don’t get me started on door, this man will sit here and eat 3 to 4 sandwiches in one sitting and then throw all of it back up, I’ve had to clean off the trash can lid so many times, he does this with almost everything he eats, not to mention his firm pop belly and god please help me say this, his hands feet legs and arms look like pufferfish, especially his feet, they look like they lose circulation everyday. and he spits up mucus randomly and one day I caught him, this grown ahh man look around spit on the floor inside of a store. It takes me a look of power to not actually hurt this man, you know what they say, the best way to a mans heart is through his stomach. I know what I might do will go straight to his heart. JK!!! I’m not that cray cray! But just let me know if any one wants a part two of my crazy life!