u/YogurtPublicStill711

When mine has come to a total stand still. Of course the whole world doesn't care about my dog like I do. But it just feels weird that everyone else is just going on like normal.

I just left my house for the first time and coming home to her not being here has broken me. I don't want to do life without her in it. It's just so god damn unfair.

It only happened yesterday but I can't bring myself to remove the clothes that I was wearing when she left. That I hugged her as she departed and was in my arms for the last time. I keep trying to find her smell on things and it feels like it's disappearing from my home already. I don't want to accept that she's really truly gone forever.

I keep talking to her and I hope her energy is with me but I want her here to touch and love.

I try not to replay her final days. Her final moments. She trusted me to look after her and I feel like I failed in every way or she'd still be here, healthy and happy. She thought a new friend was coming over to see her and instead she was put to sleep. I know it was the right thing, that she couldn't continue to suffer, but it hurts and it was probably my fault for not picking up earlier that she wasn't well and had something serious brewing.

This sucks. I'm sorry to all of you also struggling. Feel free to tell me your stories and about your loved one.

In 15 hours time she'll be gone. I've just tucked her into my bed, under my covers for the night for the last time. I'm so tired from sadness but I don't want to sleep tonight. I don't want tomorrow to come.

I don't know how i face my empty bed tomorrow night. Not feeling her warm soft body against my legs. Not hearing the comforting sounds of her snores as I drift off to sleep. Not waking up to her beautiful little face every morning. I'll even miss being awoken due to being kicked in the back while she chases bunnies in her dreams.

She's only 6. Illness has come too soon and I feel cheated. Robbed of so many more good years. I wanted more years together and to look after her as she grew old and grey. I wasn't expecting this and it's come so suddenly and so fast. I'm glad I can make the decision to put her to sleep peacefully and prevent unnecessary suffering but it feels awful. She deserves more and I want more time.

I'm so heart broken.