Do you think that bitterness initially directed at straight people sometimes ends up hurting queer people?
!None of this behaviour didn't happen on reddit!
I wanted to ask you about the issue that I recently noticed. First, I want to make it clear that I do not believe that cishet people are in any way oppressed by the queer community and my post is not intended to discuss whether "heterophobia" is real.
Recently, I've noticed that some people who feel hatred or bitterness towards straight people can also include people who aren't "queer enough" for them or don't fit into any specific definition of queerness. For example, when a non-binary person who leaned more towards female gender expression was talking about her relationship with a man on TikTok, I saw the comment "Straggot couples trying to be oppressed so bad". And I find this type of behaviour terribly exclusionary.
It reminded me a bit of when queer group I used to hang out with used to say they didn't want to see any straight couples at the pride parade because they'd puke and "that's not even love". Like okay, I get they feel bitter towards heteronormativity (I also don't like heteronormativity), but I immediately think, what about trans or bi people who are in a hetero relationship and still want to celebrate pride? They're still queer individuals. But it's hard to explain it to some people.I tried to discuss this with a girl online, I mentioned that trans people in hetero relationships still experience severe oppression, but she and her group only responded with shortcuts like "Straight people will squeeze into queer spaces and pretend they're oppressed" or "Wow, you can't say you hate straight couples anymore without being called transphobic, racist, or ableist." Personally, I've always considered such relationships part of the LGBTQ+ community. Imagine my surprise when an online friend of mine suddenly posted a video online saying, "Your straight T4T relationship will never be progressive or queer. Love between a man and a woman will never be real, normal, or progressive." Of course, I blocked her.
Until now, I thought it wasn't a particularly serious problem, but I've been thinking about it a lot lately, and I think a lot of people want to hate under the guise of being progressive, but ultimately, they direct that hatred at the rest of the community, not the system of heteronormativity. What do you think?