‘F 18’ ‘M 18’ what do i dooo
I’ve been talking to this guy long distance for a while (six months) and our relationship is really emotionally serious but technically undefined.
He tells me he loves me, his grandma calls me his girlfriend, we talk all the time, etc. He also went on a cruise during my birthday with his family. A couple weeks later i’m on the phone we’re kinda just doing our own thing sitting in silence and one of the family members who was on the cruise comes over his house. she asks him oh how’s that one girl (me) would you consider yall dating and he says after like two minutes yeah i would say im dating her note he knows im still on the phone. she replies back to him saying “that’s not what you told on the cruise” i question him about it later and his justification was that he was waiting till my birthday passed to consider us dating cause of the age difference at that time. But when I asked when he was going to actually ask me to be his girlfriend, he said “not for a while.”
The problem is he also has a habit of disappearing for days at a time. This most recent time he didn’t respond to me for 3 days (once it was 5 the other was like a week) , and during those 3 days I ended up having sex with two other people. Now I feel extremely guilty and like I cheated even though we never officially said we were exclusive (kinda he said that i have nun to worry about?)
I’m scared he’ll find out somehow and I genuinely don’t know if I’m a terrible person or if this relationship dynamic is just confusing. Part of me feels like if he really wanted commitment he would’ve made things official already, but another part of me feels sick because emotionally I viewed him as more than casual.
he also says that he doesn’t want commitment yet because his life isn’t set yet he’s thinking about going to the military taking care of his brothers whom he got depressed from
do i stop messing with him?