u/amerfran

I have somewhat nuanced views here. I've never fully understood the idea of confessing sins to a priest. I often see John 20:22-24 cited as justification for the practice "If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained." To me, all that shows is that priests can perform confessions.

To be clear, I absolutely do believe in examining one's conscience and confessing sins to God. But, I have never seen a legitimate justification for why confession must be done with a priest beyond "that's just the way it is", "they are in persona Christi" or "it makes you feel better after", none of which explains the necessity of the practice and the latter of which seeming to almost be a reason against it.

Whenever I bring this up, I hear most often that we all need to confess because we are all sinners, which we do and we are, but why must it be done through a priest?

Being in a same-sex relationship further complicates things as I would have to, on some level, not be completely honest with the priest, which makes me even more skeptical of the practice.

In your view, what is the justification for confessing sins through a priest?

I have about 60 essays left to grade and I just DO NOT FUCKING WANT TO GRADE THESE PAPERS. I got through 3 of them before I contemplated dumping them all in the trash. The students will be upset because they won't be getting them back next week. But, I physically cannot read another one of these bullshit papers.

So, how can I get rid of them? Accidentally lose my bag with all of the essays? Accidentally take them with me in the shower? Forget to buy toilet paper? Ideas are welcome.

Edit: Wow, I can't believe I have to add this. But, this is tongue-in-cheek. I am not actually looking for a way to accidentally lose 60 essays.

I see a lot of LGBT people say that they struggle with reconciling their sexuality with the Church's teachings. I am openly gay. I am aware of the Church's teachings, but I do not necessarily feel those same struggles; at least not to the extent that others seem to. People will call me a liberal, cafeteria Catholic. If I posted this on the Catholicism sub people would have their pitchforks out, ready to make a human chain blocking me from receiving Communion. Of course, sin can exist within sexuality, but I do not believe that totally suppressing sexuality is healthy for anyone, no matter their situation. Life is rarely black and white. Nuance exists.

I have never once heard a sermon about sexuality. I've only ever heard the culture war rhetoric online. I'm not particularly interested in how my fellow parishioners feel about my situation. As far as I'm concerned, if some holier-than-thou, far-right zealots want to get on their high horse and judge other people, let them. It makes no difference what they think at the end of the day.

Do you feel conflicted by the Church's teachings and/or attitudes that you've encountered within the Church?

I was heavily involved in several music ministries in high school and in college. I LOVED being a part of those ministries. As I came to terms with my own sexuality and accepted it, I started to feel uncomfortable, but stayed put for a while. At one point, my home parish got a new music director. He was extremely talented, but not the most pleasant to work with. A woman in our choir ended up accusing him of sexual harassment. She tried to get me to claim to the diocese that he sexually harassed me too--which he hadn't. At all. That was the first straw. She ended up letting it go and then moving on to attacking him because she found out he was actually openly gay. Then the gossip and chatter started dispersing about how we had a gay music director. That triggered something in me which turned me away from the Church for a while and led to me exploring other denominations. I still sing for Mass very occasionally if a family asks me to sing for a wedding or funeral, but I've recently felt called to return to join a music ministry again.

Fast forward several years from when first left music ministries and I'm the one who is now in an openly gay relationship. Part of me says to just go for it. I'm not particularly interested in how a bunch of church gossipers feel about my situation. But another part of me is reminded of the wholly unwelcoming place the RCC can be at times. Make the wrong person feel uncomfortable and you could easily be ousted from a position such as cantor.

What do you think?