u/assh0lle

I've been meditating early in the morning for a while now, and I'm not quite sure about a couple of things.

Firstly, how normal it is that my head is not quite working properly yet, I suppose it depends on type of meditation, but generally speaking does the quality of meditation suffer a lot as a result?

I meditate twice a day now, half an hour early in the morning and usually same amount of time before bed; But by the end of the day it feels as though I have more thoughts, and it seems to me that before going to sleep I sort them all out; they're also much clearer, which makes them easier to understand.

I heard from many people that meditation in the morning is the most helpful for starting the day off right.

Just curious how it works for you.

The more I delve into Buddhism the less I understand the meaning of the relationship between a man and a woman, the whole context of friendship doesn't make sense either.

If ultimately, I aspire for my love to be absolute, to love a stranger as if it were the love I feel for my mother; Why then should I have to choose, when my love transcends nature? The question isn't even 'why', but 'how'.

Nevertheless I understand that love comes in many forms, and the love I feel for my family wouldn't be the same as the love I feel for my girlfriend/wife, although I find it hard to explain exactly how. I don't know what's it like to love everyone, and this is probably the reason I can't answer my question.

In that case, living as a hermit is the only sensible, healthy option, however crazy that might sound. it's not necessarily isolating yourself but not getting married and not publicly acknowledging a relationship with anyone other than a teacher and pupil, I suppose.

Maybe I understand it wrong, or missing something, it's very, very confusing to me. Please feel free to share your insights. Thank you.

Lately I've been lost in thought and it seems ive reached a dead end.

About a few months ago i broke up with my girlfriend, and for some reason, i wanted to get through this break up with dignity; I'd already been abstaining, i hadn't been drinking or smoking anything, I've also removed almost every social media i had on my phone, so i can focus on how i feel and why do i feel this way.

I was coping perfectly well with everything; the only thing that troubled me was lust - it had always been very difficult to me to resist. I dont just mean my typical attraction to women; let's say I have certain inclinations that I find very difficult to admit to, I suppose because in society they are generally considered atypical and are regarded as nothing more than filth and vulgarity, and are seen as a sign of weakness.

I found it very difficult to meditate and simply focus because it was in my mind almost constantly and my body was reacting.

I realised that this isnt exactly a sort of thing you can simply isolate yourself from, this is deeply integrated in us by nature, and that's why I'm interested in what Buddhism has to say about it.

I notice it everywhere, and it comes in all sorts of forms, even disguised as signs. I don't know what to think anymore, but I know for certain that it causes me suffering.

Is it something you should accept? Is this actually an addiction or is it just a normal need?

Any reply would be a great help to me, thanks in advance.

I'm very new at it, and at the moment i'm at the stage where i'm trying to get myself used to meditating regularly for my own good. It happened yesterday, I wasn't in the best of moods, so i thought it'd be a good idea to sit down and just breath, meditate, observe this feeling, and it's usually helped me, like a lot, but this time it was hard for me to focus on my breath, i kept finding myself drifting off somewhere and barely breathing, it wasnt that it upset or surprised me - after all i dont meditate regularly. I kept losing focus, getting distracted by my intense stream of thoughts when suddenly i felt something quite significant, thoughts were no longer that loud, its as if they were completely fallen silent, for a few seconds i felt a pleasent sensation, as if id tapped into some high vibrations, honestly it really felt as if i was glowing. When suddenly those vibrations seemed to become too intense, and something deep inside me began to wander about within me. I was thrown out that state and opened my eyes in panic. I suppose it's hardly surprising that i find it very difficult to describe what I experienced. Anyway, i hope i've made myself clear enough, thank you in advance.

I’m genuinely curious how people managed this when starting out.

In Ireland you legally need a fully licensed driver with you while driving on a learner permit, but I know a lot of people still somehow drove alone at the beginning — especially when going to work, lessons, buying a car, or practicing.

If you did it:

how did you manage it?

did you ever get stopped?

what were the consequences?

did insurance get affected?

was it worth the risk?