Desperate for more sleep with my three-month old
Hi, we are having some serious issues with our 3 month old. He had always resisted naps but used to be ok at going down for night sleep (fed to sleep since birth, as the only method that actually works for him). We have white noise on and a blackout room. He sleeps in the next to me beside our bed.
Recently he has become inconsolable at bedtimes. He might feed for 45 minutes and be fast asleep but will wake immediately on transfer. We are transferring maybe 4/5 times before we get any chance of success. We have tried rocking, yoga ball, walking around, shushing and patting.
He has never been good at napping (or maybe we are bad at enforcing sleep). It’s really difficult to get him to sleep, and even with a feeding contact nap we generally only get half an hour or so. I have tried to follow wake windows suggested by the app and sweet spot naps but it remains so difficult to get him to fall and stay asleep.
Overall he seems low sleep needs - approximately only 11 hours in 24. This had been consistent since birth. He is no longer swaddled as showing signs of rolling. He is so noisy and active when he is asleep that it is impossible to rest next to him.
I am looking for advice on all of it - naps, getting to sleep, transferring. The lack of sleep is seriously impacting my mental health and wellbeing and I worry about our ability to care for our boy. I worry constantly that he is not getting the rest he needs to grow and that we are failing as parents.