u/bittersweetvow

Static crackling from the television in the living room wakes me. Not that I was really asleep. I haven’t had a full night's sleep in… honestly I don’t remember when. When you get to be my age the days just start running together, each one a blur of the last.

Forget remembering what I did yesterday, I can’t remember what I had for breakfast.

My Papa always used to say that. Even though he’s been gone for 30 years, I can still hear him chuckling at his joke. Always thought he was the funniest man on earth, even if no one else did.

The static grows louder and I try to ignore it, turning onto my side and covering my head with my pillow even though I know it won’t work though. It never has. It’s just my way of delaying the inevitable. I know that I have to go in there, that the only way that I will ever get any smidge of rest tonight is if I face her.

Still, you can’t blame an old man for trying.

I hold off as long as I can, humming to try and block out the steady SSSSHHHFFFFTTT that grows louder and louder with each passing moment. When humming doesn’t work anymore I start to rock back and forth, making the screams of the rusty old mattress springs join in my attempt to drown the sound out.

The static stops.

My apartment fills with a silence and I freeze. My hands still holding the pillow over my head, holding my breath. I’m beyond terrified to make even the smallest sound.

This has never happened before.

I’ve always had to get up to turn the television off.

A moment passes before I let myself relax, letting my breath out slowly. I begin to move the pillow away when a soft sweet voice begins to flow through the apartment.

Sleep my darling tiny one

Tucked within your bed so tight

Else the old gray wolf will come

And grab you by your side

“S-Sofia?” My voice comes out as a croak, reminding me of just how long it’s been since I have spoken out loud to anyone. There hadn’t been a need for it.

The dead have no use for pleasantries after all.

Her sweet little voice continued to sing, as I push my body off the sagging mattress, swinging my legs over the edge and place my bare feet on the cold floor.

He'll snatch you up between his teeth

If on the bed's edge you sleep

And drag you to the forest deep

Beneath the quaking tree

With each hobbling step I take across my bedroom floor I become more and more aware that I have no control over my body. Her voice is like a beacon to me, pulling me to her like a siren’s song. I have to go to her, I have to end this nightmare.

When I reach the door, I try to stop myself, reaching my hands out to grab the frame. My fingers just graze the wood barely bending at the knuckles in a weak attempt to grab on.

The hallway looks much darker than usual, as if a shadow has been cast, turning my usual short walk into a tunnel illuminated only by the light at the end. That damn television with its static filled screen. As soon as I see it, I can feel tears stream down my cheeks.

I am so tired, so utterly tired of this. I just want it to end.

I make my way into the living room and stand in front of the television, fighting my body as it tries to sit down in my recliner. The tears are flowing now as I lose the battle with whatever force is controlling me.

*CRACK*

My knees buckle and I slam down into the chair. It rocks back at the sudden weight of my body before settling into place. I know there’s no use in it, but I try to push myself up, wanting more than anything to get out of this room as soon as humanly possible. My body is as heavy fighting against me and I know that it’s a fight that I will lose in the end.

Her voice ends its song just then and before the apartment is filled with silence again, the static screen before me blinks off for a second before it’s replaced with a scene I know all too well.

Sweet little Sofia. My baby sister, her pale blonde hair done up in delicate little pig tails, pink bows carefully tied on by our Mama. With her pink lace dress on, she looked just like a porcelain doll.

She is sitting in our family room playing with her favorite toy, a little rag doll that Papa had made for her for her third birthday that year. Even after all of these years I still feel the ping of jealousy in my stomach looking at that damn doll. I was six years older than her and the only thing Papa had ever given me was a swift beating, warranted or not.

The scene of the television switches with a click, showing Sofia walking hand in hand down a worn dirt road with a tall lanky boy that I know is me. I am practically dragging her behind me, barely letting her stand up after she tumbles. She is crying now, upset about the dirt on her pretty pink dress. I couldn’t care less about her tears.

It always made me happy when she cried.

*Click*

I’m leading Sofia up an embankment now. Her face is blood red from crying but I don’t slow. I’m on a mission.

We reach the top of the mound and stand facing the rushing river. Only a small slope separates us from the icy waters and I can see, both then and now, the fear on Sofia’s face. She’s terrified of the river.

I watch me kneel beside my sister and wrap my arms around her in a loving embrace. I hum to her, the lullaby that Mama sang to us every night before we went to sleep. Her sweet little voice begins to sing along.

So close your eyes and fall asleep

Count the little wooly sheep

Tucked so tightly you must keep

Or he will come for you

I can feel the tears start to flow again as I watch her tiny hands wrap around my waist and I pick her up and carry her down the bank to the edge of the river. I can’t see it, but I know I am whispering for her to trust her big brother. She’s nodding as I set her down on the ground beside me and take her hand again.

She watches the river, one hand squeezes onto mine while the other hugs her doll tightly against her chest. I know that she’s scared, but she trusts me to take care of her. A fact that I use to my advantage as I tighten my grip on her hand and swing her into the river. Before she even has time to register what has happened, I have my hands on those pigtails, pushing her head under the rushing water.

*Click*

I grip the arms of my recliner as I watch her tiny body shudder before finally going limp. I watch as her doll, that damn doll she had clutched tight until the very end, floats down the river. I contemplate letting her do the same, but I know that’s not an option. So I lift her up in my arms, cradling her against my chest and I run. I run as fast as I can towards our house.

SSSSHHHFFFFTTT

The television cuts to static again and I loosen my grip on my recliner. The nightmare was finally over, now I could try to get some sleep again. I should have known better than to try to stop it. I let out a small yawn and push myself up.

Except I don’t move.

I try again, using every bit of strength I can muster to get out of my chair but the more I struggle the more I feel my body being held back. The static of the television grows deafening, pounding against my ear drums.

SSSSHHHFFFFTTT *Click*

A beautiful woman’s face appears on the screen, her blonde hair falling in curls around her heart shaped face. Crystal blue eyes glare at me intently through the screen.

*Click*

Her lifeless body lays on a moss covered forest floor, those blue eyes now glossed over. Blood trickles from her plump lips.

*Click*

Another woman’s face is on the screen now. Blue eyes and blonde hair just as gorgeous as the first.

*Click*

The bruised flesh of her naked body stands out stark against the dark blue carpet she lays on. Vacant blue eyes stare at me through the screen.

*Click*

Short blonde hair, dark blue eyes, same beautiful heart shaped face

*Click*

A bludgeoned face, red with blood and brains, blue eyes staring back at me.

*Click*

Another.

*Click*

Another.

*Click*

*Click*

*Click*

One after another they appear on the screen. All of them, every single blue eyed, and blonde haired woman I ever took the life of. My heart is pounding hard and I can feel the bile rise in my throat. What the hell is happening? This has never happened before. It’s always just Sofia. Always my sister.

The first.

The only one I had ever felt any true remorse for.

The television cuts to static again and the sound blares around me, vibrating throughout my whole body. I can feel blood drip from my nose. My tears are hot now as they stream down my cheeks and it takes me a moment to realize why.

They aren’t tears

It’s blood.

I try to scream for help but my voice cracks from the years of disuse.

SSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTT

Oh God, please make it stop.

My plea is answered as the television cuts to black, my apartment silent once again except for my heavy breathing. I begin to sob.

It’s over. It’s finally over.

And then she’s there.

Sweet, beautiful, innocent Sofia. Her pale blonde hair in pigtails, pink bows tied ever so carefully. She raises her head and her black eyes meet mine.

“Trust me, Lee. I would never hurt you.” She smiles at me, blood flowing from her mouth as she stretches a wretched hand towards me.

*Click*

Static crackling from the television in the living room wakes me. Not that I was really asleep. I haven’t had a full night's sleep in… honestly, I don’t remember when. When you get to be my age, the days just start running together, each one a blur of the last.

Forget remembering what I did yesterday, I can’t remember what I had for breakfast.

My Papa always used to say that. Even though he’s been gone for 30 years, I can still hear him chuckling at his joke. Always thought he was the funniest man on earth, even if no one else did.

The static grows louder, and I try to ignore it, turning onto my side and covering my head with my pillow, even though I know it won’t work. It never has. It’s just my way of delaying the inevitable. I know that I have to go in there, that the only way that I will ever get any smidge of rest tonight is if I face her.

Still, you can’t blame an old man for trying.

I hold off as long as I can, humming to try and block out the steady SSSSHHHFFFFTTT that grows louder and louder with each passing moment. When humming doesn’t work anymore, I start to rock back and forth, making the screams of the rusty old mattress springs join in my attempt to drown the sound out.

The static stops.

My apartment fills with a silence, and I freeze. My hands still holding the pillow over my head, holding my breath. I’m beyond terrified to make even the smallest sound.

This has never happened before.

I’ve always had to get up to turn the television off.

A moment passes before I let myself relax, letting my breath out slowly. I begin to move the pillow away when a soft sweet voice begins to flow through the apartment.

Sleep my darling tiny one

Tucked within your bed so tight

Else the old gray wolf will come

And grab you by your side

“S-Sofia?” My voice comes out as a croak, reminding me of just how long it’s been since I have spoken out loud to anyone. There hadn’t been a need for it.

The dead have no use for pleasantries after all.

Her sweet little voice continued to sing, as I pushed my body off the sagging mattress, swinging my legs over the edge and placing my bare feet on the cold floor.

He'll snatch you up between his teeth

If on the bed's edge you sleep

And drag you to the forest deep

Beneath the quaking tree

With each hobbling step I take across my bedroom floor, I become more and more aware that I have no control over my body. Her voice is like a beacon to me, pulling me to her like a siren’s song. I have to go to her, I have to end this nightmare.

 When I reach the door, I try to stop myself, reaching my hands out to grab the frame. My fingers just graze the wood, barely bending at the knuckles in a weak attempt to grab on.

The hallway looks much darker than usual, as if a shadow has been cast, turning my usual short walk into a tunnel illuminated only by the light at the end. That damn television with its static-filled screen. As soon as I see it, I can feel tears stream down my cheeks.

I am so tired, so utterly tired of this. I just want it to end.

I make my way into the living room and stand in front of the television, fighting my body as it tries to sit down in my recliner. The tears are flowing now as I lose the battle with whatever force is controlling me.

*CRACK*

My knees buckle, and I slam down into the chair. It rocks back at the sudden weight of my body before settling into place. I know there’s no use in it, but I try to push myself up, wanting more than anything to get out of this room as soon as humanly possible. My body is heavy, fighting against me, and I know that it’s a fight that I will lose in the end.

Her voice ends its song just then, and before the apartment is filled with silence again, the static screen before me blinks off for a second before it’s replaced with a scene I know all too well.

Sweet little Sofia. My baby sister, her pale blonde hair done up in delicate little pig tails, pink bows carefully tied on by our Mama. With her pink lace dress on, she looked just like a porcelain doll.

She is sitting in our family room playing with her favorite toy, a little rag doll that Papa had made for her for her third birthday that year. Even after all of these years, I still feel the ping of jealousy in my stomach looking at that damn doll. I was six years older than her, and the only thing Papa had ever given me was a swift beating, warranted or not.

The scene of the television switches with a click, showing Sofia walking hand in hand down a worn dirt road with a tall lanky boy that I know is me. I am practically dragging her behind me, barely letting her stand up after she tumbles. She is crying now, upset about the dirt on her pretty pink dress. I couldn’t care less about her tears.

It always made me happy when she cried.

*Click*

I’m leading Sofia up an embankment now. Her face is blood red from crying, but I don’t slow. I’m on a mission.

We reach the top of the mound and stand facing the rushing river. Only a small slope separates us from the icy waters, and I can see, both then and now, the fear on Sofia’s face. She’s terrified of the river.

I watch myself kneel beside my sister and wrap my arms around her in a loving embrace. I hummed to her the lullaby that Mama sang to us every night before we went to sleep. Her sweet little voice begins to sing along.

So close your eyes and fall asleep

Count the little woolly sheep

Tucked so tightly you must keep

Or he will come for you

I can feel the tears start to flow again as I watch her tiny hands wrap around my waist, and I pick her up and carry her down the bank to the edge of the river. I can’t see it, but I know I am whispering for her to trust her big brother. She’s nodding as I set her down on the ground beside me and take her hand again.

She watches the river, one hand squeezes onto mine while the other hugs her doll tightly against her chest. I know that she’s scared, but she trusts me to take care of her. A fact that I use to my advantage as I tighten my grip on her hand and swing her into the river. Before she even has time to register what has happened, I have my hands on those pigtails, pushing her head under the rushing water.

*Click*

I grip the arms of my recliner as I watch her tiny body shudder before finally going limp. I watch as her doll, that damn doll she had clutched tight until the very end, floats down the river. I contemplate letting her do the same, but I know that’s not an option. So I lift her up in my arms, cradling her against my chest, and I run. I run as fast as I can towards our house.

SSSSHHHFFFFTTT

The television cuts to static again, and I loosen my grip on my recliner. The nightmare was finally over; now I could try to get some sleep again. I should have known better than to try to stop it. I let out a small yawn and push myself up.

Except I don’t move.

I try again, using every bit of strength I can muster to get out of my chair, but the more I struggle, the more I feel my body being held back. The static of the television grows deafening, pounding against my eardrums.

SSSSHHHFFFFTTT *Click*

A beautiful woman’s face appears on the screen, her blonde hair falling in curls around her heart-shaped face. Crystal blue eyes glare at me intently through the screen.

*Click*

Her lifeless body lies on a moss-covered forest floor, those blue eyes now glossed over. Blood trickles from her plump lips.

*Click*

Another woman’s face is on the screen now. Blue eyes and blonde hair, just as gorgeous as the first.

*Click*

The bruised flesh of her naked body stands out stark against the dark blue carpet she lies on. Vacant blue eyes stare at me through the screen.

*Click*

Short blonde hair, dark blue eyes, same beautiful heart-shaped face

*Click*

A bludgeoned face, red with blood and brains, blue eyes staring back at me.

*Click*

Another.         

*Click*

Another.

*Click*

*Click*

*Click*

One after another, they appear on the screen. All of them, every single blue-eyed, blonde-haired woman I ever took the life of. My heart is pounding hard, and I can feel the bile rise in my throat. What the hell is happening? This has never happened before. It’s always just Sofia. Always my sister.

The first.

The only one I had ever felt any true remorse for.

The television cuts to static again, and the sound blares around me, vibrating throughout my whole body. I can feel blood dripping from my nose. My tears are hot now as they stream down my cheeks, and it takes me a moment to realize why.

They aren’t tears

It’s blood.

I try to scream for help, but my voice cracks from the years of disuse.

SSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTT         

Oh God, please make it stop.

My plea is answered as the television cuts to black, my apartment silent once again except for my heavy breathing. I begin to sob.

It’s over. It’s finally over.

And then she’s there.

Sweet, beautiful, innocent Sofia. Her pale blonde hair in pigtails, pink bows tied ever so carefully. She raises her head, and her black eyes meet mine.

“Trust me, Lee. I would never hurt you.” She smiles at me, blood flowing from her mouth as she stretches a wretched hand towards me.

*Click*